I would really like to smile again...

fromthewomb

I know this is going to sound like whining and I'm sorry...

After XH and I officially got divorced bc he was cheating on me our whole relationship and gave me a (curable) std, I found out that they are now TOGETHER and he posts pictures of them out together making out all over the internet and emails me copies. Then she started writing me messages on fb giving me detailed descriptions of their sex life. Then she has the gall to tell me that she thinks it very unfair of me to not talk to XH about the baby and I need to realize that they're REALLY in love and our love was nothing more than infatuation. Then he messages me and says that I just don't understand their relationship and I should try harder. Oh and I found all of this out the day after I found out I was pregnant. 

Now they're vacationing with his family in Cancun. Which we were supposed to go do. I had to move back in with my parents which is utterly humiliating. And they like to tell me just how stupid I am for not seeing this sooner and I am the one that chose HIM and I need to stop feeling so damn sorry for myself. Then mysteriously my brand new car was shot up really bad with a pellet gun after I told him that he needs to stop harassing me with all of his crap. I did get the authorities involved and they cannot do anything because it cannot be proven in a court of law.

Now I am failing miserably at work, my friends all seem to have disappeared and I'm still getting morning sickness through the entire day that gets so bad I have to call into work or leave in the middle of that day. 

I feel fat and unattractive and stupid. I cannot even get through a week at work without my manager having to tell me that I need to "step it up." My brain is a total mess right now. I don't know why I had to say all of this... I have a doctor appointment next week to get all of this figured out. What should I say to the doctor? I don't want them to write that I'm not going to be able to take care of my daughter. I could never handle him taking her from me and even worse that nasty skank touching my baby.

alamo10

Oh wow, I'm sorry you are going through this. My story is very similar. When I was around 4 months pregnant, I walked in on my boyfriend with some girl he works with. He broke up with me right there. So I went to the Dr for my first appt and they told me he had given me a STD, also curable but still horrifying to find out. And him and this girl are still together. We didn't speak from that time until LO was 2 weeks old then not again until last week. So I understand what you are going through. But think of it this way, if they were cheating on us with these girls they are with now, wouldn't that mean these girls have the STD too? lol that always makes me feel better.

But hold your head up high and be the bigger person. Ignore their stupid messages and just know that if he'll cheat on you, he'll cheat on her.. just give it time.

And you should share your feelings with your Dr. They can put you on medication and you can feel loads better. Feeling this way is common and they are not going to think you can't be a great mother because of it. And if he does take you to court for custody, bring up the fact that he is harassing you.. that isn't going to get him very far. Hope you start feeling better!

fromthewomb

Thank you! I feel much better knowing I'm not the only person out there... I think I am going to really hate men for a while after this..

alamo10

Oh yes, me too. This whole situation has made me perfectly content being single.