What I WANT LO to call my MIL......

Julias Table

I want him to call her grandmom, or grandma, or nana, or nona, or anything.....but MAMA!

She calls herself mama!  It drives me nuts when i hear her reach for him and say "come to mama my baby!"

She originally stated when DH and I got married that she wanted to be called MOMMOM.  I put an end to that when she started saying it when i was pregnant, but instead of MOMMOM, she was shortening it to Mama.

I told DH that I didnt like MomMom because it sounds too close to Mom, or mama, which is what I call myself  to LO.    He told MIL that she can be called anything she wanted but we didnt like MomMOm.

DH said she agreed to be called grandmom (which by the way is what everyone in DH's family calls their grandmoms).

So...she is here now and wont stop calling herself "mama"  to LO.  I am upstiars so I dont know if she thinks I cant hear her and is sneaking it, or just plain calling herself Mama because that is how she is , crazy!

Do I say something?  (sorry long vent!)

Aubrianarose

That is super weird and I'd put my foot down IMMEDIATELY.

There is no excuse for that. I'd explain that anything near Mom, mama, mommy is out of the question.

srthomas88

I would say something, Mama is something I would only call my mother.

tSquared1987

Honestly, that would piss me off. And I would .make. my DH say something to her. She is not "mama", you are!

wearenutts

My MIL does this sometimes too. We always correct her when she says it and she just says "oh, I'm just so used to being the mom"

Anonymi

I completely agree that her calling herself Mama is out of line. That should be the first thing your LO should call you (no matter what your future plans of what she will call you is). That should not be your MIL's status at all. I would put your foot down and explain to her the situation and possibly remind her that you are the mother so terms like mom, mama, and mommy are reserved for you since you carried her for 9 months, gave birth to her, and are the one who takes care of her everyday (or at least I'm assuming that's the situation).

Tink0910

I would say something.  There is no way I would want my child calling someone mama!!  HELL NO

Julias Table

Thanks everyone!  I am sure she will deny saying it since no one was downstairs when she did it. and DH will take her side and say "oh she is old and probbaly forgot" or whatever and then i will push the issue with DH and DH will accuse me of attacking his mommy. I will have to wait until she does it again in front of us.

I swear, I need to start taking notes of what i will and will not do when my son has a wife.

 

happyhoopla

Ugg! Why do we have so many posts about psycho grandmas wanting to be called mama or refering to the baby as theirs? Weirdos.  

QueenBee320

That is really insensitive on your MIL part and if it were me I'd be upset too.  I would make my DH say something because I would most likely feel awkward, but I am rather timid sometimes.  My daughter calls my mom "Bea" she made it up herself and my mom loves that she did that. 

AverysMom1118

I would definitely say something!! That would piss me off, especially since you aldready expressed that you didnt like it. 

Rach21

Julias Table:

She calls herself mama!  It drives me nuts when i hear her reach for him and say "come to mama my baby!"

What the crap? You bet your sweet boppy I would tell my MIL in no uncertain terms that my LO will always and only have ONE Mama, and that is me. Normally, I would try to think of a more peace-keeping and tactful way of addressing an issue with my MIL but NOT IN THIS SITUATION. Your MIL raised a boy, your DH. She can take her pills and come to terms with the fact that she is a GRANDMA.

(My MIL told me that my DS looks so much like my DH, it's like DS is hers all over again. I kindly said, 'this time you get to be Noni and I am the Mommy.' I know what she meant, but I wanted to clear up any gray areas right away!) 

hcmamm1

With DS, my MIL tried doing that as well. She would always say "come to mama" and i would turn to DS and tell him to go to his grandma. She got the hint after correcting her. she now calls herself grandma.

islelily

There is no reason your LO should be calling her Mama/mommom or whatever, whether you're taking care of him or if she is all day.

I would feel awkward approaching my MIL about it too, but would probably bite the bullet. Hopefully your DH will mention something to her again.  My mom picked a different name that she wants to be called (Nanny or Nan) by DS and I have the HARDEST time calling her anything but Gram (what I called both of my grandmothers)... so it does take time, but stick with it!  It became a joke with my mom the week we visited with DS. 

wife1014

Yes, you stop it now.  You tell her right out that you are his mama and she needs to call herself something other than that, Mom, or momom.  End of discussion. 

MIL's suck!

jenna3016

Julias Table:

I swear, I need to start taking notes of what i will and will not do when my son has a wife.

 

 

I always think that, too - when I read vents about in-laws.

MrsFv20

holy hell. Every time I click on these MIL vents I swear they get crazier and crazier.

I'm all for trying to find a tactful way to confront people, but I think in this situation both you and DH need to be direct. Tell her nicely but firmly that this is a ridiculous battle to be picking, and she is causing tension and conflict. It's disrespectful to your role as mother, and you aren't being unreasonable. 

Julias Table

Thanks for the support everyone!!!  Just to clarify, she doesnt watch or take care of LO. She visists once, maybe twice a week.