Clicky Poll : Bed sharing — The Bump
Babies: 0 - 3 Months

Clicky Poll : Bed sharing

Re: Clicky Poll : Bed sharing

  • I swore I would not co-sleep BUT

    I believe, you gotta do, what you gotta do so that LO (and momma) can sleep well at night. LO is far too young to pick up on bad habits, so at this point, im not setting myself up for a toddler sleeping in my bed.

    I plan on having DS in his crib by 3 months max!

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  • image racheldaigle46:

    I swore I would not co-sleep BUT

    I believe, you gotta do, what you gotta do so that LO (and momma) can sleep well at night. LO is far too young to pick up on bad habits, so at this point, im not setting myself up for a toddler sleeping in my bed.

    I plan on having DS in his crib by 3 months max!

    It's not so much a no-no due to your kid never wanting to sleep in his own bed as it is due to SIDS. You can possibly roll over and suffocate your child...I think that's what the OP was getting at.

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  • LO's crib is side-carred to our bed. Technically, this is just co-sleeping, but it is pretty close to bedsharing since the crib is just an extension of the bed and I often fall asleep in bed while BFing during the night since I don't even have to get out of bed to get LO. We have put effort into making it the safest arrangement possible and once LO starts to roll/move, we'll make even more changes (like going down  to 1 pillow each).  Here is a good book on bedsharing--most of it is on why it is a great choice to feel good about, but it also gives the most complete list of safety tips I've seen.

  • DS sleeps in a PNP on my side of the bed.  All I have to do to see him is sit up, and I can "rock" the PNP platform while lying down.  Plus, with any luck, it'll be easy to move him to his crib once he's STTN regularly because he's used to sleeping by himself.
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  • Bedsharing isnt necessarily a no-no-it matters what you read. There is research out there that states bedsharing is safer than crib sleeping as statistically more babies die in a crib as opposed to in bed with parents, countries like Japan who bedshare have an extremely low infant mortality rate while America's is really high, etc. Bedsharing is not one of those things that's 100% wrong without a shadow of a doubt-there is conflicting research so you can believe what you want to believe. Personally, I bedshared with DS and there's research that shows children who bedshare are more independent and confident and my DS is the epitome of that, so that's what I choose to believe.

    With that being said, I bedshare with DD part of the night. She gets up between 4-5am and cluster feeds on and off for 2 hours, so we bedshare for those 2 hours until DS wakes up so I can grab a little more sleep. I would bedshare more because I truly believe it's better for baby, but my DD tends to sleep better when she goes down in her own bassinet for the night so it just doesnt work for her.

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  • LOVE this post- and I"m liking the results!  I also swore I would not bed share, but DD had horrible Acid Reflux and I felt more comfortable with her being at an incline in my bed than hers and she slept sooo much better.  We have this square shaped blanket  thing that is really soft and has a pillowish square edge so DH and I can feel exactly where her "box" is all night.  But when I was breastfeeding, she slept right on my chest- which I really miss!  But I sleep much better now with our invisible safety line!
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  • I swore I would never bedshare... until I came home with a 35 week infant that had trouble maintaining his temp and needed the kangaroo care very frequently. I had to sleep at some point, and him sleeping on my chest just became a daily (or nightly) thing depending on his needs at that point in time.

    DH was adamently against cosleeping and bedsharing until he looked at his 5lb son and didn't have the heart to set him in the crib and let him fuss.

    I'm learning that parenting is about compromises at times, and doing what is right for your family. Read the literature, involve your medical team, and make the best decision.

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  • I bedshare with DS for part of the night and for some naps.  He wakes up for his last middle-of-the-night feeding around 4 or 5 am and I bring him into bed with me until DD wakes up around 8 am.  I did the same thing with DD until she started STTN when she was around 3 months old.  I do take safety precautions and feel 100% comfortable with my decision to bedshare.  It is a personal decision just like every other aspect of childcare and parenting.

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  • We decided we wanted to bed share and co-sleep before DD was born. We have had no issues and both of us absolutely love it. It seems like such a special time for the 3 of us and dd seems to totally love it.

    We also have a bassinet next to the bed and I have put her in that a few times when I was really tired and felt a little unsure of having her in there when I was so sleepy.

    I don't want to debate about bedsharing either except to point out that most of the other developed countries do bed share and actually have lower infant mortality and SIDS rates than the US does.

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  • I won't bedshare, but that's more due to my issues than anything else. I have severe Restless Legs Syndrome, Insomnia, Non-Restorative Sleep Syndrome, and Fibromyalgia. Getting relaxed and comfortable enough to fall asleep is so very difficult for me and I wake up every 30-60 minutes unless I take Ambien, which I do on the weekends when DH doesn't have to get up for work & can get up with DD. I also never stop moving all night long. It is hard enough to bedshare with my husband, I can't imagine putting a baby in there too.

    DD is currently in a moses basket next to the bed. If she's having a hard time falling asleep I might pull her in with me for a little bit, but then it's back to the basket. DS has slept in my bed a handful of times in the past 4 years if he was really sick or something, but I didn't sleep those nights at all. 

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  • Other -- we bed-shared for the first 3 weeks or so and then transitioned Nora to her crib. I would have done it for longer, but she is such a noisy sleeper that we all sleep better when she's in her own room.
      norathe girlsamelia
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  • I chose "other" because MH and I decided cosleeping is not for us, but we have done it a few times with DS and the only times that we did it was when he was really sick and all he wanted to do was be close to one of us otherwise he wouldn't sleep.
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  • I chose sometimes. It was all the time - every night, all night until she was 6 weeks. Now she sleeps in the PNP next to the bed until around 4/5AM when she wakes up and doesn't want to go back to sleep. At that time I pull her in bed with me, snuggle, and she falls right back to sleep.

    I don't see anything wrong with it as long as you're careful. She likes to snuggle with me, I like to snuggle with her... I don't see the big deal.

    I also don't plan on putting her in her own room/crib until 4 months or until she's STTN, whichever comes first.

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  • image KyleTrigger:

    We decided we wanted to bed share and co-sleep before DD was born. We have had no issues and both of us absolutely love it. It seems like such a special time for the 3 of us and dd seems to totally love it.

    We also have a bassinet next to the bed and I have put her in that a few times when I was really tired and felt a little unsure of having her in there when I was so sleepy.

    I don't want to debate about bedsharing either except to point out that most of the other developed countries do bed share and actually have lower infant mortality and SIDS rates than the US does.

    All of this for me.  I am not endorsing bed sharing because I certainly do not think bed sharing is for everyone, especially those who are deep sleepers, those with medical conditions, etc.  However, it works awesome for us.   It makes nursing DD so much easier and we all get more sleep because of it.  I did it for over a year with my first DD and it was such a special time for all 3 of us. She transitioned to a toddler bed with no issue.  (I do realize this doesn't always happen!) I will also say that as a working mom, bedsharing is also a great way for me to reconnect with my LO.  I love watching her sleep and hearing her breath after being away from her all day.  Charleigh even joins us early mornings sometimes around 5 :)  DH enjoys it and we will do it with Maggie as long as it makes sense for us.  Maggie is a much easier baby than Charleigh so we may move her into the PNP once she sleeps in longer stretches.  I definitely want her in the same room as us while she is an infant.  As for sex with DH, we were never a bed sex only couple anyways ;)

    I still can't change my siggy btw, Maggie is 3 weeks old today!!


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