thoughtless comments

georgia3

So, I went out to dinner with two of my sorority sisters from college last week.  We are all pretty comfortable with talking about where we are in our family planning stages and two of us are currently TTC. 

One of them asks me how things are going and I told her not so great, that I had just finished up a 75 day cycle.  Well, she starts laughing and makes the comment "Wow, maybe you are in the early stages of menopause".

Umm, yeah, that's not really what I want to hear.  And certainly not while you are laughing like it's the most hilarious thing you've ever heard.  It really hurt my feelings, but I didn't have backbone to tell her so.

Just had to get that off my chest- thanks for listening. 

HappyMrsK

Geesh, that's harsh. I'd be upset too if a friend said something like that to me. People can say really dumb things. If only more people would think before they spoke...

MelleTX

I'm so sorry!

I have just recently found myself aware of how I interpret thoughtless comments from other people. And then I realized, I probably said those types of things without even thinking about it before I was where I am today.

Don't be too hard on your friend. It kills me to think how insensitive I might have been in the past. She didn't mean it to be that way.

boymamaco

I'm so sorry. It sounds hurtful. I have both been hurt by a thoughtless comment and made plenty myself. It's not fun to be on either side of the situation. I bet you she thought about it later and realized what an a$$ she'd been.

lhcooper

Just yesterday, a good friend of mine who knows I am still recovering from an ectopic pregnancy was talking at lunch with me and another friend about the fact that she doesn't want kids while her boyfriend does.  Then she said "I'm 40, if I wanted kids I would have had them already, I would have had them 15 years ago."  I burst into tears right there and then (I turn 40 in August).  She felt terrible.  I'm not excusing the thoughtless comment AT ALL.  I'm just saying, even close friends make them without realizing it, which can be really hard to take!

CityPixie

When I was 38 my mom said: "you're too old now anyway"  (granted she didn't know I had any interest in trying.)   Just yesterday she was saying how hard it is for her to babysit her grandchildren by adding "there is a reason people have babies when they are in their 20s or 30s; only young people can handle it."  (sure she meant as opposed to 65+ like her...she just has no idea)

bluebabka

: ( I'd probably email her and tell her how insensitive that was. I'm hoping she didn't realize at the time how horrible that was.