Teaching a Toddler to Fall Asleep Independently

webMistress0609

Help me with this. I used to not mind staying with Ari while he fell asleep, but he's now using 676957 stalling tactics & taking entirely too long. Naptime & bedtime have been battles since he was about 12 months old. Bedtime routine is fairly calm now, but once it's lights out, there is trouble.

For the past week, I've been leaving if he starts getting wound up. I'm not a fan of the "threaten & leave" approach, but I'm not sure what else to do right now. Ari is also very sensitive to missed windows for sleep, so getting him down "on time" is pretty crucial. Right now he's still awake & we've been trying to get down for about 45 minutes. I'm thinking some of this is separation anxiety related, but waiting it out is not working - it's been 8 months.

Any tips? 

webMistress0609

@fredalina: Yeah, she's pretty pro-extinction from an early age. Not gradual extinction either, full on CIO. I find it kind of weird given the gentleness of the discipline method and was surprised by it when I 1st read the book. I think it's basically a case of pushing "autonomy" at too young of an age. I obviously will be putting my own spin on the sleep advice if it comes up in a class.

Jelliebean1982

Have you tried any stalling tactics yourself? Like I need to go wash the dishes, go potty, switch the laundry...and when I am done I will come back to check on you. At this age sometimes a reasonable excuse to leave works on separation anxiety. I always would leave the door open and DD would fall asleep while waiting for me to check on her.

Sally J

We had to drop the long naps in order to get bedtime to be easier.  Charlotte goes to sleep without us being in the room, but Cooper is unable to keep laying in bed relaxed without one of us there.  After reading books, it's only about 10 min or less we sit in his room.

Making sure he's full and not thirsty helps.  Giving him plenty of loveys and a night light also helps.  A strict routine is important and completely dark room with white noise is also necessary.

I do threaten Cooper that if he doesn't lay still and go to sleep or if he gets worked up then I leave.  I have followed through with leaving and it takes only a 1 min of being gone for him to shape up and fall asleep. 

Good luck!