Toddler Separation Anxiety

jday1229

I WAH and DH works out of town about 3-4 days a week. My mom comes over a couple of days a week to help out while I work. So basically, DS is rarely away from me and never away from all 3 of us at the same time. Since December, we've been trying to make it to church more often. The first few weeks he did fine in the nursery but after Christmas it became more difficult to leave him. Now he cries when I carry him into the room, before I've even put him down. Yesterday the nursery worker said he stops crying as soon as I leave (which wasn't true because I've never left him while he was crying, I think she was just making a generalization). I sat with him and played for 15 minutes until he was distracted and then I was able to sneak out. I don't think sneaking out is good but I don't know what else to do. Any suggestions?

sunnyday016

Does he know any of the other kids? Maybe it'd be worth it to get together for a few playdates with another child that frequently attends. DD always goes in easier when she sees her friends are there.

Also, we usually bring her in with us to the first part of the service when we do music. We bring snacks to keep her occupied if she wants to stay for the sermon time too, but usually once the music is over we'll say "want to go play with your friends?" and she's usually eager to do so.

If these don't work, I don't think it's awful to sneak out, or even to leave them when they're crying. He will learn that even though you leave, you ALWAYS come back for him. It may be rough for the first few times, but it should get better. It's a stage and he will outgrow it. 

MrsBeckO

We're just starting DD in school this week and it's the first time she'll be in the care of someone other than me, DH or my mom. Her new teachers told DH and I that we should not sneak out of the room.. That even if she's crying, we should tell her bye and that we'll be back later. They said if possible, we should spend a few minutes with her helping her start an activity before we go. Sneaking out will just leave them confused.

ThePinkHound

Lilia is usually the only one in the nursery unless her "boyfriend" is at church, lol. I have to get her interested in the toys, and then I sneak out. She has had times where I couldn't leave, and I'm thinking there are going to be some more as we hit the separation anxiety at 18 months.

I don't feel bad for sneaking out though. I know she's fine as soon as she starts in with the toys.