WDYT?!

tri047

DH is no help at all.  He is so grumpy.  Since our NT scan went well yesterday we are finally announcing it to all of our friends.  We cannot tell them all in person so I was going to send out an email.  Here is what I have so far:

WDYT? Honestly...

 

We are now accepting applications for baby sitters!

T___ and I have a big announcement: we are expecting a bundle of joy - or not as some of you may be thinking .  I am 12 weeks and 5 days pregnant!  Our jellybean is due on April 16th, 2009.  I wish we could have told you all individually face to face, but we just couldn't wait to see you all.  We cannot wait to see all of you and are glad to make many of you "aunts" and "uncles" for the first time.

 

?alliebooberz?

if you are worried about it not being personal, why would you send out a mass email? I would email each person individually.

tri047

I am not so worried about it not being personal - just about the wording.  DH said the last sentence sounded weird.  I dunno.  He works with two or our guy friends and refuses to tell them face to face, which I am kind of annoyed about.

tri047

Fred,

You mean send them individually?  I suppose I could do that.

Erin0806

The "or not" part is confusing to me. And the subject line too. Meh. I dunno.

I wouldn't do it individually...I don't think people will care if they get a mass email. I know if I had told every person individually it would have taken hours and hours. 

sgrl

I agree with Erin - this is the only part I didn't care for:

 

- or not as some of you may be thinking

 

 

WinsyWade

It's really cute but the last sentence sounds toomuch like the one before it.

also the part about the bundle of joy, and someone not expecting that was tripping me up while reading.  It might be an "inside" thing with your friends though.

tri047

Thanks Erin.  I may take that out.  The only reason I put that in is because we are the ONLY ones even close to having a baby and the word "baby" freaks out all of our guy friends.  So I guess I was trying to be a bit of a smart ass knowing what their reaction is going to be.

sgrl

I liked the subject line, though.

Erin0806

Ah...I read it more like you thought people wouldn't be happy for y'all.

tri047

How about changing the last line to say something like "We look forward to sharing this with all of you"?

WinsyWade

 For the last sentence...

Our little jellybean is looking forward to meeting all of his/her aunts and uncles in a few short months.

That's ok, but not my best... maybe you can improve it. 

Btw I like the subject line too.  Once I read the first line in your perspective I got it, but it still sound funny.  Maybe you could make that "joke" a seperate sentance?

Erin0806

My thoughts (sorry...I do copy writing for a living Just some ideas.

T and I have a big announcement! We're expecting our first bundle of joy! I am 16 weeks pregnant! Our jellybean is due on April 16th, 2009. 

We wish we could have told you all in person, but couldn't keep the happy news to ourselves any longer! Now you'll all get to be honorary aunts and uncles, and see how NOT scarry it is!

tri047

Thanks Winsy - I am thinking of a way to change it.

wvu2000

I do not like "jellybean". Especially, if you are sending it to your DH's coworkers, it seems a bit childish.  Our baby is due on ....... would work fine.

JMO and congrats!

tri047

Ok...thanks for your opinion, but thats our nickname for the baby.  Everyone here knows that and so does our family.  Why not share that with our friends?

?alliebooberz?

yeah that's all I meant, the letter itself was okay but I would probably use "scary" not "scarry" unless you feel like your baby will be violent

tri047

Erin & Winsy - thanks for your help!  I think it sounds a lot better now.  I changed it around so it didn't sound so confusing.  Now I just have to hit "send".  Ahhh!

tri047

Lol Allie!  I did catch that!   BTW - I spph Buddy Jesus.

wvu2000

tri..If that is your baby's nickname and it is well know, then use it.  It does not sound bad.