For those with kids born after Sept 1st - school question

soxvyanks

Hi all -

My DD was born in November - 2.5 months after the cut off date for starting school.  She will end up being the oldest in the class, which is fine, but she goes to a preschool program now, and based on feedback from her teachers she is not only on target with her class, she's ahead (coordination, cognitive development, speech, reasoning, etc - all their words), and very mature for her age.  

That being said, (and obviously everyone thinks their kid is the smartest, etc), has anyone found any programs in their area that allow you to go against this policy? Or is it just what it is?

Again, I don't mean to sound like my kid is the smartest, etc, I'm just going on what the teachers tell me which led me to think about if this is going to be an issue.  

Sorry if this sounds dumb... but thanks for any thoughts.

  

MammaBear81

My DS was born Sept 21st but our cut off date isn't until dec 1st or 31st (I can't remember exactly) so he was technically 4 when school started this year.  I think the only way to get around the official cut off date would be to send your DD to a private kindergarten and then "transfer" her to the public school in first grade.  The school district generally won't hold a student back if they have completed a grade level, but I don't think they will budge on the cut off date if you want her to start early.  GL, and I hope it works out.  DS is on the young side and he is above average in his class, I know how you feel. I know he's not the smartest kid ever, but he's ahead of his classmates, and he one of the youngest 5 in his class.

rxqueen918

DD #1 was born in October, and I'm also in MA with a Sept 1 cutoff date. She does make the cutoff for the private kindergarten that her daycare center runs, so we signed her up for that. However, from what I understand talking to other parents from my area, the public school doesn't allow them to go into the first grade from the private K unless they are 6 by Sept 1. While I think DD#1 is developmentally ready to attend the private kindergarten, I do worry about her being bored in public kindergarten learning everything over again. Our choice was to have her repeat pre-K or go into private kindergarten and then repeat it in public school. We figured they were actually learning how to read and write more in kindergarten, so why not have those skills reinforced.

You can always ask your local public school district if they would consider allowing her into the first grade after attending a private kindergarten even though she would not be 6 by Sept. 1.  I know around my area they live and die by those cutoff dates. Having a November birthday myself, I know that being one of the youngest in the class can sometimes be frustrating from a social perspective (being the last of your friends to get your license, turn 18 and not even be an adult when you first go off to college, turn 21), so it may not be so bad if she has to wait. Good luck!

smo321

My DD is the same way. Her b-day in 12/9.   She was the only 2 year old in the 3 yr olds room.  This fall we will probably be moving her up to the VPK room even though she is not old enough to be in VPK.  We are going to be looking into Private schools for DD to go to.  This is the only way around it.  We figure if we dont and make her wait she will be bored with school.  The school system in FL sucks anyways so were going to have to do something to make sure she gets a good education.

GeneGoddess

DD was born on Sept 5.  Cut off here is Sept 1.  If she's "ready", I'll send her to private kindergarten, then regular 1st grade.  My sis was born Aug 28 so was always the youngest in her class and was fine.  Her boys were born late July, and she's delaying their start for a year since they AREN'T ready, so they'll be older.  It all depends on the kid.

jenchris05

Studies show significant advantages for those who are older than others in their class. I an a former teacher and my son has a 9/27 bday - we'll most likely wait the extra time.

penguingrrl

I plan to follow the cut off dates wherever we're living at the time (DH is in graduate school and will be graduating and moving on to a postdoc before DD1 starts school) and she'll either be by far the youngest or the oldest in her class (her birthday is 8/30). I'm more nervous about having her young than old to be honest. My siblings both just made the cutoff and while they did okay with it young, both had serious maturity issues when they started high school and at 13 they were just not ready for the issues high school kids encounter. I won't hold DD back because of this if the cutoff is after 8/30 (this varies by state and/or district) but I wouldn't push a kid to enter early either.

celiabwatson

I have several experiences that relate (although my son is a Jan birthday so the point is moot for him). 

My brother has an Oct birthday and we were on sabbatical the year he turned 5. Since we were living in a new place my parents thought it would be important for him to be in school so he could make friends. They approached the school district and the school gave him a Kindergarten readiness test. He passed with flying colors. (that was in WA state). Then we moved back home the next year and the public school wouldn't let him in to 1st even though he'd been to K. He therefore went through school as one of the oldest and has done fine. He didn't love repeating K but it was with a whole new peer group so he just focused on making friends.

Also, I teach at a private school that starts at 3 years old and goes up to 8th grade. We are faced with the question of sticking to the cut off date or not all the time. Over the last several years I have had only a few kids come through who are young for their grade. All of them had been at our school for a while and were truly ready for the grade they are in. We had others who we let start early as 3s and have held back since then because they didn't stay ahead of the curve. That can be hard on the child/family. So, while your child may be ahead now, and may continue to be ahead you also have to be prepared for the fact that they may not stay ahead and making the adjustment later is harder than waiting now. Teachers are taught to differentiate instruction so it's not the end of the world if your child is way ahead of their peers necessarily. Though I will agree that there are better and worse teachers out there. 

laurasuzanne2006

I was born sept 15 and we had a sept 1 cutoff so I was always one of the older kids in my class.  Honestly it was never a big deal.  Doesn't mean your kid is ahead or behind. 

GettinNervous

The principal of the school our kids will be attending (DS starts kindergarten in Sept 2011) told us that it is best to wait esp for girls. She said it might not seem to have a negative effect when they are young, but when they are in their teens it could. I don't remember her exact words, but something about the subjects they learn as they get older and their brain development.

shouldbworkin

She definitely won't be the oldest.  DS has an Aug bday with a Dec 1 cut off and there are kids with bday the October before his (10 mos older than him).  Expect to have kids in your DD's class that are up to 6 mos older than her.  she will do just fine. And, don't forget, you can always supplement her learning at home.  Even with DS being one of the younger kids in class, they don't always go at the same pace that I want to with certain things, so we supplement at home. 

Angela814

This has been a huge topic over on the Parenting board lately since most of us have kids going into kindergarten next year. There are a lot of people with kids born close to the cut off that are considering holding them back an extra year. Academics are just part of kindergarten. The socialization aspect is also very important, and some parents want their child to have the extra year to mature.

DD1 is in 4K this year. Academically I think she's on par or ahead for her age, but she's still learning a lot. Besides academics, she's learning how to interact with the other kids, follow new routines, convey emotions, respond correctly to different situations, etc.

How old is your DD now? She may not be one of the oldest in her class. You might find kids with July-August birthdays that will start kindergarten at 5 years, making her somewhere in the middle in terms of age.

My thoughts are that with the number of parents holding back children, your DD may be at a disadvantage starting earlier where she could be more than a full year younger than the oldest kids. But ultimately you know your DD best, and when the time comes, you'll make the decision that's best for her.

 

susanmosley

There are all sorts of pros to being the mature leader in your class.  And with a November birthday and a Sept 1 cutoff, she won't always be the oldest in her class.  For example, my DD has a mid September birthday.

mrsgin03

My ODD has a late Oct birthday and our cut-off is 9/1, so she will be starting kindy when she's almost 6. I never even considered trying to start her early, and I think the only way we could is if we did private school, which I'm not willing to do.

I was a late-Sept birthday and I went into kindy at 4. They had me takes the tests and I passed them all with no problem, so my parents figured it was no big deal starting so early. While I turned out fine, if I could do it again, I would have asked my parents to hold me back (and they agree, in hindsight) Although it's not a big deal when you're younger, it's hard as you get older. It's hard being the last to get your license, last to turn 21, going to college at 17, etc... I look back at some things I did now and know it was because I was that much younger than my peers, a year can make a big difference in maturity levels when you're a kid.

It will never hurt to hold them back but starting too early could have some negative impact. Your child will be in school for the next 13 years, why not give her one more year of real "childhood"?  If you think your child will be bored, try finding some enrichment activities she can do outside of school to enhance her learning. However, I really can't imagine that she will be so bored that it will make her not like school.

This is just my opinon, coming from someone who's "been there".

ShufflerChick

Public schools are typically very strict about cutoffs, unless it's 1-2 day kind of thing. You're talking 2 months, your DD will not be the oldest in the class. Especially since now the trend is to actually hold kids back an extra year. I completely understand where you're coming from though. We have a Jan 1 cutoff and DD was born Feb 4, so she will be among the oldest too if she goes by those dates. The only way I've found to get around it is to find a private school that either has a different cutoff or allows her in ahead. That said, it really depends on the child and on the makeup of the class. When I asked at one private school, the director said that many children were held back a year by their parents so my DD would be nowhere near the oldest anyway. I haven't yet decided whether I'll push the issue since DD is still a couple years from prek, but I'm looking around at options.