other childrens behavior

beau2ful

So I am seeing a trend and I don't really know what to do about it. Most of my freinds have kids older then mine, between 3 1/2 to 7. Well they don't play nice. Tonight a friend was over and I had to tell her daughter (3 1/2) not to push my daughter, and then the smashed her fingers with a ball on purpose while playing. I don't like things like this. I have noticed it with some of my other friends kids also. We are having out of town friends stay with us in a few weeks with their 3 1/2 year old and I am worried. they have been around each other and she was grabby and kinda pushy.

Is this just the way kids are with other kids? What can I do? I don't want to hang out with my friends because of this. Any one else run into this issue? TIA

Kersbear

Really it depends on the child, but a lot of it is pretty normal.  Well that is if it's a short phase, not something that has been happening for years.  Sadly, other than redirecting, explaining that it's not nice, and keeping your eyes on the kids there isn't too much you can do when it's not your child. 

Now, if the parent of the child is on top of it/correcting the behavior/etc I wouldn't have a problem with it, but if the parent thinks it's funny or what have you I would have an issue with it.

Carter went through a hitting phase and it was just a matter of us staying consistent with the consequence and eventually the phase ended.

 Every child is different and again a lot of it is normal behavior for kids seeing what happens etc.  How the parent reacts is a big thing to me.  Good luck I hope the visit goes well.

shainababygirl

I just keep an eagle eye on the situation and then remove my child if necessary. I have several friends (well, acquaintances) who just don't pay attention to their kids around a baby.

I have 3 nephews (2, 3 & 6) and their Mom (My SIL) is VERY good about making sure that the boys are gentle around Keevs. I've only had to correct one of them, like, ever. And they are RAMBUNCTIOUS. 

I think it really depends on the parents. But I agree, if the Mom or Dad was on top of things, it wouldn't bother me. If they weren't, it'd get on my nerves.

Jelliebean1982

So, what did the parent do when her DD pushed yours or smashed her ball with a finger?  When my child is aggressive towards others I have her make restoration by saying sorry and getting the child a tissue if they are crying.  If she's uncooperative she does a time-out in her bed to regroup before coming back out to play. 

Sharing is a difficult concept for many three year olds.  I try and help sharing with younger children by choosing games carefully.  I've found that Elefun is a good game.  My DD is usually trying to get the butterflies in the air and the younger children grab the ones on the ground.  However, my DD will share if she sees that a younger child doesn't have any butterflies.  

I also like bringing out the play food when younger children come over.  We set up a blanket on the ground and have a pic-nic.  My DD has fun serving the food to everyone and there is a lot of food to play with so there's no arguments over wanting something someone else has.  

 Playing dress-up and having a dance party is another fun activity, as are crafts.  Have fun!  You'll be the parent of a three year old one day.  There's never a dull moment