When will this be over?? (long) — The Bump
Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

When will this be over?? (long)

Just went to the Dr. on Thursday for our first ultrasound (10 weeks) and found out I was pregnant with twins but that there was no heartbeats and that they were only measuring about 6 weeks.  My husband and I are absolutley devastated. 

So my question is how long is it going to take for my body to  miscarry?  I know no one has the exact answer but is there anything I can do to help the process along??  I hope that doesn't sound insensitive but I just want this whole nightmare to be over.  All day long all I thing about is the fact that I have two precious babies inside of me that still haven't passed.  I still have all the pregnancy symptoms and this is just torture knowing that they are gone, but not gone. 

I have an appt on thursday with my Dr. but I'm thinking of calling tomorrow and seeing if I can get in to discuss some options.  So that's my next question.....what are my options?  Why hasn't my body miscarried yet and what can the doctor do to help it??  I really feel like I just need to have this miscarriage so that I can have some closure and move on.  I hope this doesn't offend anyone I just don't know where else to turn for advice except you ladies.....

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Re: When will this be over?? (long)

  • First of all I am so sorry for your losses. My first miscarriage was at 10 weeks and the baby only measured 6w as well. I opted to have a D&C because like you my body was not getting the hint and doing anything on its own.

    Your doctor will likely give you 3 options: wait for a natural miscarriage, go ahead and do the d&c, or try a medication like cytotec to speed things up. I tried Cytotec the day before my D&C but it did not work for me (although I'm in the minority so if that is something you might want to try don't go off of my experience). 

    Unfortunately there is no answer as to how long your body will take to realize that a loss has occurred. At some point though there is a risk of infection so your doctor won't let you go for too long. 

    Call your doctor in the morning and see if they can get you in asap to discuss your options and get the ball rolling. You are not being insensitive at all. This is a very hard thing and you just have to do what is right for you. 


    ETA: for typos


    [spoiler] My Blog: Grow Baby Grow

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  • I am so sorry for you losses.  I can't even begin to imagine.  It is completely normal to have that feeling of "just wanting to get things over with."  don't feel guilty for feeling that way.  I was the same way.  I M/C naturally but then my body decided to not let everything go, and my lining remained thick.  I had a D&C thursday, and physically I am doing well.  I am so sorry that you have to deal with this.  I hope that you and your doctor decide on the best intervention for you.  Sending lots of (((HUGS)))!
    TTC #1 since August 2007.
    multiple meds, lap for endo, injections...
    m/c at 7 weeks 1/22/11.
    BFP 3/21/11- au naturale!

    Our little miracle Jonathan Jozsef
    born 11/19/11
    6lbs. 13 oz


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  • I am sorry you are going through this. Hopefully your dr can give you some answers.

    I don't have an answer for you on when you might start to miscarry; with my losses, I started bleeding on my own.

    Good luck to you.  My thoughts and prayers are with you.

    DD#1 11/7/04 DS#1 6/24/06 Chemical Pregnancy 6/08 DD#2 1/28/10 after secondary infertility, Clomid, & acupuncture missed m/c 6/2010 at 8 weeks (baby stopped growing @ 5.5) DS born sleeping 1/13/2011 due to cord accident at 22 weeks. DD#3 3/10/2012
  • i am sorry for your loss. unfortunately everyone on this board knows how you feel. Devastated, alone, why-me, how does this happen, the babies arent alive but i am still carrying them.....it went through my head over and over.

    Hopefully your doctor will have some information for you on the next steps to take


    DC:#1 10/2006 born at 40 weeks (33 weeks PTL)
    DC#2 born silent at 22 weeks 1.11.11
    Dc#3 born vbac 1/2012 <bra DC#4 born VBAC 3/2014
  • I was 10 weeks too when I found out and measuring at 6 weeks and Thursday will be 3 weeks since finding out and I have a D&C scheduled so tired of waiting and still feeling pregnancy symptoms so I know how you feel.

    We actually were not scheduled to go back to the Dr. till Wed but I rescheduled for this past Friday cause I wanted to speed things along so I could too put all of this behind us!

    We did decide to plan a trip for April so now at least we have something to get our mind off things...it doesn't really work though cause I still think about everything all the time!

  • I'm so sorry for your loss. Good luck with the doctor. All of the ladies before me have given great information/ advice.  Take care of yourself.
    DD2- May 2012 Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker 1/26/11- missed m/c @ 12 weeks
  • I'm so sorry for your loss. I just wanted to say that I am in the same boat as you. After my second ultra sound and still no heartbeat, my dr wants to have me back in a week to check my levels again. I just want all of this to be over so that I can move on. I started spotting this weekend, so hopefully my body will naturally take care of everything. If not we are going to schedule a D&C. Good luck with everything. 

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  • I am so sorry for your loss and pain you are going thru. With my experience to "compare" I am on my third week of "miscarring". I thought the natural way to go was best for me, being that I am not a meds kind of person, but had I know that I would bleed this long, I would have picked another option (if I knew that would take less time). Call your doc and have an explanation for each option. Like all of us we all would like this to be over and move on. Big hugs to you
  • I know how aweful  it all feels.

    I found out last monday during my ultrasound that there was no heartbeat and had to wait till wed before I could get my D&C.

    I know the loss and how wrong you feel with your body. and wanting it to just be all over. I'm so sorry you had to go thru this too and hope you can get some answers from your doctor soon enough.

    Good luck, and just know your not the only one! that has helped me so much.


  • I'm so very sorry for your loss. 

    Mine measured almost 8 weeks (found out at just over 8 weeks) and 1 dose of generic Cytotec was all it took for me to get the m/c process going.  I'm glad I went that route... couldn't bear to wait for it to happen naturally and wanted to avoid a D&C.  If you do the Cytotec, take it on a Friday or when you know you will have a day or two off where you don't have anywhere to be.  I was able to get out of the house the next afternoon, but I definitely couldn't have gone anywhere that morning.  Too much cramping as well as the emotional component of all of this.

    Help for Haiti: Learn What You Can Do

    BFP 12.20.2010 :: missed m/c 1/2011 around 8 weeks
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    Stick, little one, stick! EDD October 15, 2012
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