update (re: officially freaking out)

lhcooper

Thanks, everyone, for the support throughout the day.  It has really helped, especially without DH here (he is flying in tomorrow night).  I'm all alone here in bed (ok, the cats are here too) so any virtual company you feel like sending my way would be very welcome. Sorry it's taken me so long to update; I have mostly been on the phone with DH, my mom, my best friend....

So, my old RE called immediately in response to the text message I sent him and he was very nice.  He agreed that 752 is on the low side but said that (as we all know) that we can't know anything until I do another beta on Saturday.  He believes it is definitely a pregnancy, and that it's just a question of what kind; he's also concerned to be sure it's not ectopic (I currently have no symptoms of that sort, though maybe it's too early?).  

TMI: I am having spotting of the sort that when I pee, the water in the toilet gets tinged.  But when I wipe, it's light pink/brownish.  So far.  Mild cramping.  Definitely larger and sore BBs. 

Anyway, the RE prescribed progesterone just in case it's a viable pregnancy, though here's another story of (rant about) my old clinic's incompetence (or maybe even the RE's).  He said he'd tell the nurse to send in the rx.  An hour later, the receptionist calls to schedule my beta on Saturday morning (7:30, good God).  I try to confirm that the progesterone has been ordered.  She says she doesn't know but will ask the nurse and have her call me back.  No phone call up through the time I leave the office and go to the pharmacy -- some 3 hrs after talking to the doctor -- and the rx isn't there.  I call the clinic and now talk to a *different* receptionist who has no idea what's going on.  I lose it right there in Walgreens:  "I am standing here to get this rx so I can go home and lie down and deal with the unfortunate event I'm experiencing related to pregnancy that I cannot discuss in the middle of Walgreens!"  Then my cell phone loses the connection because Walgreen's has bad reception, and I call back and tell the receptionist to frigging call the pharmacy.  She says she can't reach a nurse, they're all with patients, but she'll try to "run back" and get one of them.  Finally someone (a doctor -- maybe mine?) calls and speaks with the pharmacist and I get my progesterone (oral version b/c the pharmacy doesn't carry the suppositories and the super nice pharmacist who has watched me for 6 months picking up clomid, estrace, femara, etc. doesn't want me to have to travel anywhere else to get some).  AAAGGHHH!!  Makes me think I should have called my new RE but that sort of didn't make sense to me since though I'm sure she would help, it's the IUI from the old clinic that produced whatever's going on now.  Does that make sense? I have to say, I wasn't thinking so clearly when trying to figure out what to do, and I knew I could text my old RE rather than calling reception at the new clinic.

Lying in bed trying to stay calm, trying to be positive but I don't feel especially hopeful.  It is true, as someone pointed out on the other thread, that at least I appear to have gotten pregnant.  Sure, but what if it's the last time for another seven months?  Or ever?

This blows.  Plus at the very same time that I was dealing with this today I got a very disappointing email at work about something I applied for and have been denied for largely bureaucratic reasons rather than anything having to do with my own merit for same (as I've been told).

 

 

shyntrue

Still thinking good thoughts for you! <<Hugs>>

ALF222

Hope it is ok if I chime in... My first beta was 900, so not that much higher than yours. As long as it goes up on Saturday, you should be good! Good luck!

lhcooper

alfontaine:

Hope it is ok if I chime in... My first beta was 900, so not that much higher than yours. As long as it goes up on Saturday, you should be good! Good luck!

Thanks, alfontaine.  The downer is that going by my LMP of 12/22 (if we don't count the one I thought I had last week), I'm 25 dpo or 5w1d today.  So only 4 days behind you but I assume with a much, much lower beta, comparatively speaking. 

 

kbrodie06

Thinking positive thoughts for you. The power of positive and the power of the bump dust is good. Sending lots of both to you and will keep watching for how you are doing!!! Think positive and all will be ok, whichever way ok is.

Kristin

Llamamama

You poor thing!  You have a lot going on right now... I will be sending you all my positive thoughts.  Hang in there!  I will be anxiously waiting your update after the Beta on Saturday. 

Mrs.McIrish

I hope you can get some rest and cuddle with the kitties.  I'm sorry you are going through this and wishing a great outcome!

boymamaco

Hi Coop! I just finally logged on and saw your post from last night and updates today. I will say a prayer for you! Sending you lots of positive thoughts and hoping you get a good nights sleep. Take care of yourself. Saturday is almost here and you will have some answers then. Hugs!

amandaleigh1

I am sending positive thoughts in your direction... I hope things turn out for the best!

pinksandbermuda

Sorry you have to deal with all of this uncertainty-  must be very difficult.   Hopefully Saturday will bring some good news!   Hoping for the best for you!

sadiebird8

Thoughts and prayers are with you.  Hope all turns out well.

oceanangelbeauty

Wow how crazy! I am so hoping for good news on Saturday!!!!!

aurora1974

I am sorry you're going through all this.  But I'm still thinking positively for you that it will all be ok.  I understand your concern about the last time for 7 months but it is a good thing that you got pregnant. And maybe it will need to be the last time for 9 months.  Bump dust sent to you. Good luck!!

CityPixie

i'm thinking of you coop.  Hope all turns out a-ok.

jcath

What a craptastic day.  I can understand why you left that RE.  I'm hoping you've got a fighter in there and Saturday gets here soon and your beta gets you some answers.

UOduckBride2be

I have my fingers crossed for you that everything works out and this is the "take home" baby you have been hoping for.  I am so sorry if my comment on the earlier thread upset you, I honestly thoguht that it was a positive that you got pregnant since you have been trying with different protocols for some time.  To me that means that maybe you and your RE have found the protocol that works for you and you will not have the long wait to conceive again if (god forbid) things don't work out.  I know hearing someone point out the "silver lining" isn't always helpful when you are stressed and I am again so sorry if I added to your stress. 

Thinking of you!  Take Care,

Sarah  

lhcooper

UOduckBride2be:

I am so sorry if my comment on the earlier thread upset you, I honestly thoguht that it was a positive that you got pregnant since you have been trying with different protocols for some time.  To me that means that maybe you and your RE have found the protocol that works for you and you will not have the long wait to conceive again if (god forbid) things don't work out.  I know hearing someone point out the "silver lining" isn't always helpful when you are stressed and I am again so sorry if I added to your stress. 

 

Hi Sarah, no apologies necessary.  You really didn't upset me at all, I think I just couldn't hear what you were saying yesterday.  I totally hear it today and I am pleased that we conceived, though I'm still worried about egg quality and wondering if that's why this one didn't take.  Problem is, this protocol was the same as the previous four, the only difference being that it was the timing I wanted (36 hours after trigger) PLUS having DH around afterwards to back it up.  We'd never been able to have that combination before because of DH not living here, and we may not be able to again before mid-May.  But it does make me rethink whether or not to jump to IVF the way I was about to, that's for sure.

Anyway please don't think you upset me, because really you didn't.