So maybe a dumb question...

CodyGH

So for the past few weeks, I've been having crazy thoughts.  I constantly worry about DS and DH.  I worry that DS will stop breathing in his sleep.  Every morning I check on him and hold my breath thinking that I will find him dead in his crib.  I worry that he will die while he's at daycare.  I worry that DH will get into a car accident and die.  If DH and DS are together and driving, I worry that they will get into an accident and DH will die and DS will be seriously injured if not killed.  I know that we need to do this anyway, but I'm making DH go with me to get life insurance because I'm scared that DH will die and I won't be able to support DS by myself.  I'm also scared that DS will be left alone if we both die, so we are making wills.  So to sum it up, I worry and constantly think about death and my loved ones dying.

So is this a form of PPD?  Or is this just anxiety?  Or what?   I've had problems with anxiety and such in the past, but haven't for a while now.  I haven't taken any medication for over two years and it wasn't really that bad back then.  Anyway, what do you all think?  I was going to go talk to someone, but honestly can't afford going to a psychologist on a regular basis since my insurance kinda sucks.  There's a free service here at work, but they can only talk to me 4 times per issue for free.  After that, they have to refer me to someone else.  I don't know... I just don't want to worry all the time.

jaime5121

Call your Dr now.  Sounds a lot like PPA and Intrusive thoughts.  Most therapists and Drs will work with you about payments (since you mentioned your insurance sucks - I know the feeling).  Please, don't put this off and let it get worse.  I know how that feels.  Here is a good website with a lot of good information:  https://www.postpartumprogress.com/  I didn't find it until I was nearly "cured".  It has a wealth of information though.  But please, call your Dr and let them see if it really is PPD or PPA.

totallyshocked

I def agree with PP that it seems to be PPa def and maybe PPD but it seems you are worrying more than experiencing depression issues. I mean no harm in trying the free services at your work and if they think medication is needed your primary care doctor can also prescribe you medication. GL

klcl8981

I was only diagnosed with PPD, so the PPA posters who have PPA would know better than me if it is that maybe? BUT I can tell you that I have the exact same thoughts, and worse... I never knew how just those thoughts alone could be such a crippling thing. It's exhausting to have them every. single. day... I hope you feel better.

daronsmommy

I have the same thoughts as well. My fear that DS will stop breathing in the middle of the night is so bad that I refuse to put him in his crib. We have been bedsharing since he was 2 months old and got his shots. 3 days after his shots he was so congested he woke up twice gasping for air. He has slept in my arms every night since. Please call your doctor and explain how you feel and what you are thinking. And if you need to talk to someone, we are all here for you. Good luck.

alamo10

This isn't a dumb question. Alot of people feel this way. Worrying all the time is apart of being a parent but I understand worrying too much can pretty much control you. I felt the same way before I started my medication. To me it sounds like you have more anxiety issues rather than depression but medication could really help.