Clicky POLL: Which would be better?

almostjennifer

My 4 yr old needs to get a battery of shots at her 5 year check up and is deathy afraid of them and also prone to dramatic tantrums and hysterics.

So...

Do I tell her that this is what is happening before we go to the doctor's office and endure the possible waiting room kicking and screaming, OR wait until we are in the exam room to tell her and risk her feeling betrayed?

[Poll]

healthynut

I voted tell her before b/c I am a child life specialist and the entire profession is about reducing the trauma of a healthcare experience.  We always teach and inform the child about what he/she is going to experience and let them choose what kind of distraction they'd like to have during the experience.  With that age group, we often use I Spy books and start them in the waiting room and then continue during the shots.  They know what's going on, but they are a part of their own distraction.  Good luck.

ali-1411

I told DS he was going to get shots at his 4 yr old appt and the anticipation was awful.  Next time, I wouldn't tell.  Just do it.

foreverMorgan

I voted Tell her before. Would doing a role play at home make her more comfortable? Role playing works like a charm for DS.

Liz342

I definitely would not tell her.  I see what the pp who is a child life specialist is saying but I really think that telling your LO prior is just going to give her added anxiety/fear.  She can either dread the shots the whole day or for 10 minutes at the doctor's office.

My LO is only 2 and probably doesn't really understand anyway but we have never even uttered the word "shot" or told her what was coming.  I know she is probably the exception but 90% of the time she doesn't even cry anymore.  The nurse comes in, she lies down and looks at me like "what's this all about mom" and in an instant it's over.

I can think back to being a little kid and just deading the doctor's office so bad because I was so afraid of shots.  I would try to keep your LO unaware as long as you can and not even talk about the shots!

Andrewsgal

healthynut:

I voted tell her before b/c I am a child life specialist and the entire profession is about reducing the trauma of a healthcare experience.  We always teach and inform the child about what he/she is going to experience and let them choose what kind of distraction they'd like to have during the experience.  With that age group, we often use I Spy books and start them in the waiting room and then continue during the shots.  They know what's going on, but they are a part of their own distraction.  Good luck.

I could not agree more and I have to say i have two friends who are Child Life Specialist and they are amazing, i love them and their jobs! 

susanmosley

I wouldn't volunteer the info before you get there.  BUT if she inquired, I would def not lie, or even fudge a bit - if she asked why or what is going to happen, I would disclose all info

Edited to add - I have always done the opposite of my advice.  I've always told DD all that would happen, but she is 2 and couldn't even really understand until recently, and has never had any issues with shots.  Like I said, in your situation, I would say, "Tomorrow we are going to the doctor" and then follow her lead.  If she hates shots and is 4, there is a good chance she will outright ask, to which you should offer the info.

I'm also willing to accept that others' advice is better and your child has the right to know.   

JenJar

I tell DS beforehand for a couple days leading up to the appt.  I'm honest with him and tell him it will probably hurt but it will feel better really soon.  I even told him the same thing when we went for me to get  flu shot.  He knew mommy was getting a shot and it would hurt a little bit.  I'm all for being honest and preparing him for what's to come.

SweetPeanis

I would rather tell her ahead of time.  We just had to bring my 2 year old into the hospital to do some tests.  One was an ultrasound and the other was a test that they needed to sedate her and put in a catheter.  A few days before her appointment I explained to her exactly what was going to happen.  I know she was nervous on the day of the tests but she did great. 

The nurse said we did a great job preparing her becuase she did really well and didn't freak out.  If you wait to tell her until you are already there, she might feel lied to.  I think being upfront is better. 

Kim&Jim

healthynut:

I voted tell her before b/c I am a child life specialist and the entire profession is about reducing the trauma of a healthcare experience.  We always teach and inform the child about what he/she is going to experience and let them choose what kind of distraction they'd like to have during the experience.  With that age group, we often use I Spy books and start them in the waiting room and then continue during the shots.  They know what's going on, but they are a part of their own distraction.  Good luck.

I did a Child Life Internship!  So glad to hear others are in the profession.  It was awesome, but hard to get a job when I was looking back in 1996....man, I'm old!

I would also suggest role play.  Get a doctor's kit and let her take the temperature, vitals, give shots, etc. to her doll so she can be the one in control.

You may also try figuring out ways to help her relax.  Teach her to breathe deeply during the shot, hug a stuffed animal tightly, etc.  Whatever she needs to do to cope.

lucylea

We are all about telling ahead of time.  DD is just like me and she needs to prepare herself so it works really well.  About a week out we start roll playing with her doctor kit and she gets to give and get as many shots as she wants.  She always brings her doctor kit along as well and our pediatrician and nurse are excellent at letting her give them shots first.  She even got to give the nurse a "flu mist" before she got hers!  

almostjennifer

Thanks for the input everyone!!