Because we're looking into just about everything....(long)

BlueRidge8

I wish I could pinpoint when it started, but it was a several weeks after LO was born.

There are days, I call them my dizzy days, that I'm walking through a fog. My brain seems hazy and I have a hard time communicating as well as I think I should. I feel sleepy, even when I get a good (for a mom) night's rest. Sometimes, I'm jittery and anxious. My head is literally heavy and I have to use my headrest at work.

I have no libido. None.

I cry easily and have those 'what if I fell down the stairs with DD right now' panic thoughts - though I assume that's normal for new moms.

My midwife mentioned PPD but I dismissed it because I'm not 'depressed'. We've tested for hypoglycemia and hypothrioidism and ruled both out. I've suspected that it's my depo shot (I never took this pre-preg).

Does any of this sound familiar or am I grasping at straws?

 

jaime5121

PPD doesn't necessarily mean you are "depressed" per se.  I think you need to tell your midwife exactly what you just told us.  Can I ask why you are testing for all of these different things?  Are you trying to "prove" that you don't have PPD?  I'm here to tell you there is nothing wrong with a diagnosis of PPD/PPA. 

Yes, a lot of what you are describing I could have written.  I felt like I was in a fog most days.  I now all new parents are sleep deprived.  This was different though.  I had difficulty communicating - almost a hard time finishing sentences at times.  Sex drive - hell what was that?????  I cried constantly.  I would cry for hours and not be able stop.  Litterally - I couldn't stop.  Mine went a step further though - I didn't care about myself.  All of my attention went to LO.  I neglected myself.  There were days I wouldn't eat - I would simply forget.  I would be too tired to shower - I didn't care what I looked like.  Everything went to my child and nothing to me. 

Please, talk to your MW.  Things can get better, I promise.  The most difficult thing  was to admit to myself that something wasn't right.  This was supposed to be the best time of my life.  Guess what, it can be much better.  GL

BlueRidge8

Thank you very much for your response.

Honestly, I've been so frustrated I would have welcomed a Dx of PPD just because it would have been an ANSWER.  I think I initially brushed off the potential of it being PPD because everything felt so physical, not emotional (and clearly my understanding of PPD is not strong).

When I told my MW that I was happy (true) and didn't feel depressed she suggested the potential for a thyroid issue and when that came back normal I've been holding hope that it's Depo (of which I'm not getting my next shot).

I don't feel sad. On my dizzy days I just feel detached. I haven't been very weepy though baby-related things can trigger the tears much easier now. I have noticed that when I'm having one of my days, if I can take a 20 minute nap it makes me feel much much better, like a re-set button.

Who knows. I'm supposed to see her next week and I plan to put it all all there.

Thanks for reading all of this.

totallyshocked

Your dizzy and out of it triggers one thing to me......PPA. I battled PPD and PPA and at times thought the PPA was worse. and until you get anxiety under control u will feel like ur living in a cloud. I know what its like to be scarred to drive and even leave the house.....much less take care of a baby. Most of the meds for PPD also treat PPA or you can get something short term (like xanax or clonazepam) which can bring immediate help to your symptoms while long term meds set in. just do yourself a BIG favor. Keep a diary daily until you go to your doc and right down how you feel, what times, etc and bring that. They can then pin point if its anxiety, depression or both. GL

Unknown

This content has been removed.

astroMom

Yes, everyone feels a little different with PPD and/or PPA.  That's why I think it is good to just be SUPER honest with your physician.  See, I was good at hiding mine.  I still seemed OK at work and still ate, etc.  Inside my head was like a war, though.  It finally took to where I couldn't concentrate and couldn't go to work for me to really say this is enough.  I've always been a super hard worker with great concentration, and it took getting to where I couldn't think straight, or even remember what my husband had just said, to go to the OB.  One of my main things was anxiety over being left alone with the baby, even though I appeared to be a really good mom around others...I think that is why my husband didn't take me as seriously at first, bc it was mostly when I was alone.