New - dealing with a loss

corndog8

Hello,

I'm new here and saw this board while searching  for something to comfort me tonight.  We recently lost our baby - was due 7/30/11 - first time pregnant.  We went in for our 12wk ultrasound to hear our baby's heartbeat and were so excited.  We were told that there was no heartbeat and the baby had stopped growing at about 9wk.  My Dr. confirmed this for us the next day (I had gone in 8wk5d for ultrasound and all was good).  I had a D&C Thurs. morning and still feel devastated and heartbroken.  It is hard thinking we had made it to 12wk and actually lost the baby 3 wks earlier. 

Reading your posts has helped that others are going through what I am and is comforting to know I'm not feeling this alone.  My husband has been wonderful, but it's nice to hear from other woman.  

Thank you. 

TD1109

 

ekmOC

I'm sorry that you have ended up here, but welcome.  I hope you will find comfort by sharing your story and reading accounts from other mothers.  I think you will find that coming here helps and things will get easier as time goes..

gr8supriz

I sincerely hope you are able to find a fragment of comfort in this outlet.  Somehow this is where I've ended up in my desperate search for I don't even know.  Maybe its because 6 days ago I was over 21 weeks pregnant and now I'm not.  My body is so confused that my breasts are painfully swollen and no matter how much medication I take, my body isn't allowing me to sleep.  I'm so sorry for your loss and wouldn't dream of wishing this on my worst enemy.  I've been through many trying emotional times where I questioned my faith.  This is different.  Numbing emptiness is the only company I have am able to recognize or acknowledge and I pray for the inner strength required to see this through.

Hang in there and feel free to vent to me anytime you feel the urge.

 

 

LDW80

I am so sorry for your loss.  Your story is very similar to mine.  I was due in July too (7/1).  Went in for our first appt. at 9 weeks and everything was great.  Went back 4 weeks later at 13 weeks for routine check-up to hear heartbeat and there was none.  Baby was measuring at 11 weeks.  I thought I was in the clear as well being 13 weeks.  I had found all this out 12/27 and had a d&c on 12/28.  I still struggle as to why this happened and that there is no baby anymore.  The first couple weeks were horrible but with time it is getting "easier" to accept.  I have found this board to be very comforting and I have also found a local support group.  Good luck to you and hang in there.  ((hugs))

Froggy76

I'm so sorry for your loss.

SheLovesMrHip

I am soooo sorry you have to feel like this! You have come two the right place as we have all suffered a loss and our hearts all hurt. Just know we are all here for you one day at a time!!

ziggy23213

I'm so so sorry for your loss, and I hope you find some comfort here. ((((Hugs))))

lavril

I'm so sorry for your loss.  I had the exact same experience as you (due in July too).  Found out at 12 weeks our baby was only measuring at 9.  It's so heartbreaking and devastating    I'm glad you found this board to confide in other women who understand the pain you're going through.  Feel free to PM me if you ever need to talk.   ((HUGS))

Ginkeez

I found out about my baby when I was 15 weeks 5 days.  The baby was only measuring 11 weeks 6 days.  I had heard the heartbeat at what would have been my 12 week appointment, so my baby must have died shortly afterward.  One of the biggest things that causes me pain is how long my baby was dead inside me, and I was completely clueless.  It still haunts me.  How could I have let it go that long?  I spotted for over a week before it worried me.  I feel like I failed my baby in some way, that I wasn't there for him or her when he passed. 

You will always miss your baby, but you will be able to cope as time goes by.  I miscarried naturally and bled for a couple of weeks after that.  I focused on getting back into shape, which felt better once the bleeding slowed down.  I still get upset about it, and will always have an empty place in my heart for my angel baby.  My body got back to normal in a couple of cycles and I am now pregnant again.  I am happy, but it makes me miss my angel baby even more.  I 'm sad that I never got to meet him or her.

corndog8

Thank you all so very much for your kind words, thoughts and listening.  It's nice to have a safe place to go to where you feel understood.   Today was really hard thinking about our loss and I just broke down and cried.  I'm sure there will be more of these days.   It's still hard to even see pics in a magazine or hear about someone who's preg. 

It's also hard when physically I don't feel healed yet from the D&C.  Can anyone else tell me how long it took for them to feel better and/or have the bloating tummy go down?  It's still there and when I look down and see it, it's just another reminder      

 Thx