"Winging it" with twins

newsbaby

My twins are 5 weeks and 2 days old.

We were on a schedule for a few weeks since they were both on a schedule at the NICU. For the past 2 weeks, we sort of fell off. I hated forcing them to eat if they were not hungry, and I hated making one wait if he was hungry earlier. So now, we are feeding on demand (formula mixed with some pumped breast milk).

Am I doing the wrong thing? I am not following any specific method (babywise, etc) for my children, I am just winging it. It is kinda rough since there is limited time for me to do anything around the house or for myself.

Also, their long stretch seems to be in the early afternoon and that stinks for obvious reasons.

Sometimes they are on a similar time together and sometimes they are not. When they are on a similar time, its good so I can get things done but its bad when one is screaming while I am feeding the other and DH is at work. I can't prop any bottles since DD has feeding issues still and needs my full attention,

Am I a total mess!?! 

JourneyToBaby

Whatever is best for you and your family is the "right" thing, imo.  But I must comment that I have twins and they were not on a schedule for the first 7 weeks.  I was running myself absolutely ragged.  We put the babies on Babywise after 7 weeks and now that they are 9 months, I can honestly say that was one of the best decisions that I have ever made. It was tough at first with sleep training but I cannot imagine not being on a schedule OR leaving them with the babysitters while my husband and I work and them not being on a schedule.  Best of luck to you!!!!

 

Mouseygail

I don't have twins, so I can't comment on that aspect...at the beginning though, it think its just all about survival mode.  You do whatever you need to do to make it through it.  My DS has pretty much made his own schedule overtime...but I can see how with 2, you'd probably benefit from them being on a similar schedule over time.  I hope you get some good feedback here!

Mrs.Babbsy

I assume your babies were preemies? Did they tell the reason you should keep them on their schedule?

 I fed one right after the other, I kept them on the 3 hour schedule. I pumped as well and had to mix their formula. I had to keep this up until they were at least 8 pounds. The problem with letting preemies get hungry and put themselves on a schedule is because it takes a lot of energy for them to eat. They can burn more calories to eat than they are consuming, esp if they already have issues. We were not allowed to try longer than 30 minutes per bottle.

I know how hard that schedule is to keep up with, esp with trying to pump.

This is what my NICU nurses/doctors told me when we were discharged. They stayed on the same schedule, just a half hour difference, because it was one right after the other.

good luck:) I'm not trying to be negative, just telling you exactly why I was told to follow the schedule.

 

 

JustaKidAtHeart

If it works for you then it is right but it sounds like it is not working.  Sometimes it is difficult to "force" one to eat before they are hungry BUT a lot of the time they may be hungry but not as hungry as to be upset.  We kept the boys on a schedule.  They came home on it and we kept it going for my own sanity.

nolachick11

I kept a schedule when they came from the nicu.  Sometimes we would get off schedule and I would have to adjust.  One thing that definitely helped me was a notebook.  I would start a new page each day and under their names I would write what time they ate and what kind of diaper they had.  I kept the notebook up for 5 months. They did eat about every 3 hours.  I would feed one, change one, then feed the other and change.  If I had to feed at the same time by myself, I would sit on the floor with a boppy.  Mine were able to share a boppy for a while, and I would just hold the bottle for them (not sure if that would work for you since you mentioned dd has feeding issues)  Hang in there...it will get easier!!!

newsbaby

Yep they were preemies, born 34w6d. DD was 3lbs 11 oz when she was born, now she's 5 lbs 6 oz. DS was 5 lbs, 11 oz and now he's 8 lbs 9 oz. The NICU never told us we had to do anything specific the weight or timing. 

newsbaby

nolachick11:

I kept a schedule when they came from the nicu.  Sometimes we would get off schedule and I would have to adjust.  One thing that definitely helped me was a notebook.  I would start a new page each day and under their names I would write what time they ate and what kind of diaper they had.  I kept the notebook up for 5 months. They did eat about every 3 hours.  I would feed one, change one, then feed the other and change.  If I had to feed at the same time by myself, I would sit on the floor with a boppy.  Mine were able to share a boppy for a while, and I would just hold the bottle for them (not sure if that would work for you since you mentioned dd has feeding issues)  Hang in there...it will get easier!!!

i have the notebook too. There is no way I can go without it! 

Mrs.Babbsy

newsbaby:

Yep they were preemies, born 34w6d. DD was 3lbs 11 oz when she was born, now she's 5 lbs 6 oz. DS was 5 lbs, 11 oz and now he's 8 lbs 9 oz. The NICU never told us we had to do anything specific the weight or timing. 

maybe ask your pedi for thier input, I have it written and was told on both of them. They were discharged at 2 different times.

 

newsbaby

Mrs.Babbsy:

newsbaby:

Yep they were preemies, born 34w6d. DD was 3lbs 11 oz when she was born, now she's 5 lbs 6 oz. DS was 5 lbs, 11 oz and now he's 8 lbs 9 oz. The NICU never told us we had to do anything specific the weight or timing. 

maybe ask your pedi for thier input, I have it written and was told on both of them. They were discharged at 2 different times.

 

Mine were discharged at 2 different times too - DS @ 8 days and DD @ 13 days. I could ask my ped but IMO unless they have twins themselves, they really can't say much. Multiples are a whole 'nother animal! 

Mrs.Babbsy

Agreed, but they can tell you about why they should be on a schedule, such as the weight needing to be 8lbs or using all the energy to eat.

When the girls hit 8lbs it was 4 months and they did great with letting me know they were hungry, but when I fed one I fed the other for my own sanity. It's nice esp when/if you are a working momma.

Only you know what works for, but I am just telling you medically why I kept them on a schedule, not just for my own sanity.

 

newsbaby

Mrs.Babbsy:

Agreed, but they can tell you about why they should be on a schedule, such as the weight needing to be 8lbs or using all the energy to eat.

When the girls hit 8lbs it was 4 months and they did great with letting me know they were hungry, but when I fed one I fed the other for my own sanity. It's nice esp when/if you are a working momma.

Only you know what works for, but I am just telling you medically why I kept them on a schedule, not just for my own sanity.

 

Got it. I appreciate the advice! Our next appt with the ped is 1/28 so I can ask then. 

Million$$Baby

If what you're doing now is working for you, then don't stress about it. However, I found that for my own sanity I needed to keep my kids on the same schedule. Otherwise I would have been doing nothing but feedings all day long, and would have had no time when they were both asleep. I kept an every 3 hour feeding schedule (which eventually became a 4 hour schedule) and when they were very small I just fed them back to back instead of at the same time. So one would eat and then go in their bouncy seat, and usually fall asleep, then I'd feed the other and put him/her in their bouncy seat and they would usually fall asleep too. At night, when one woke up to eat I'd wake and feed the other too, otherwise I would have been up every single hour feeding someone. Really, there is no wrong way to do things, but to make things easier for yourself it may be beneficial to keep them on the same schedule. I did always feel like I was forcing one to go along with the other, but unfortunately when you have two that's just how it is sometimes. And my kids never seemed to mind

Million$$Baby

nolachick11:

I kept a schedule when they came from the nicu.  Sometimes we would get off schedule and I would have to adjust.  One thing that definitely helped me was a notebook.  I would start a new page each day and under their names I would write what time they ate and what kind of diaper they had.  I kept the notebook up for 5 months.

I was just about to add something like this I had a white board in my kitchen where I recorded what time they ate, how much they ate and when they pooped. It helped me keep track of who did what when, and also helped when DH came home so he would know what needed to be done when.

shipoopiisforme

mine weren't on a set schedule but if one woke to eat i would wake the other one too so they were always feeding at the same time. i also learned that in the beginning i could not let my son go more than 3 1/2 hours between feedings or he would completely melt down and it would be impossible to feed him or calm him down.

i also put them down to sleep at the same time as much as i could this way it would at least give me a few minutes to go to the bathroom, shower or whatever. in the end like pp said you have to do what works best for you. and i think no matter what system/schedule you follow the first 2-3 months with any baby, let alone twins is just rough. hang in there mama, you are doing great.