tough love for my picky eater
I'd LOVE to hear from any moms who have personally tried this method with their picky eater.
I read the post below and my DD doesn't have any weight or other medical issues so no worries in that regard for her.
I'm sick and tired of the pediatrician telling me the same tired story over and over: keep offering her different foods and she'll eventually try them. It's NEVER worked. I looked it up online and only find similar type articles along with suggestions.
Getting her to help prepare her own meal = FAIL
Giving her fun shaped food = FAIL
Offering her 1 new food with 1 familiar food = FAIL (she only eats the familiar food)
The other day, she was so constipated and in pain that I needed an OTC medical intervention in the form of a suppository. At this point I'm done letting her only eat carbs because that's just not normal. She HAS to eat more foods so that doesn't happen again.
I have all 3 sneaky chef books and I'll even use those meals for the entire family but there are some days when we have to prepare a separate meal for us and one for my toddler. I'M DONE!
I'd really like some advice from other moms that have done this before themselves. Maybe you can share what worked and what didn't and the outcome.
Thanks so much! 
Re: tough love for my picky eater
My DS doesn't eat vegetables. He will eat most the other food groups (in one form or another) so I just have him take one bite of whatever vegetable we are having. He takes a teeny tiny bite usually but I give lots of positive reinforcement for trying it. DS is served exactly what I make for the family and if he doesn't like it he doesn't have to eat it. Sometimes he'll just eat the fruit or bread, but I'll have him take just one bite of veg or the main dish or whatever he isn't eating. At times he has put it in his mouth, chewed it up and decides he doesn't like it but I still give positive reinforcement for trying it.
I remember my mom forcing my brother to eat vegetables and it was awful. One night he threw up in his plate.
Maybe try to start with serving DD what the rest of the family is eating, there is inevitably something in that meal that she will eat right? So say she eats all her fruit and wants more, tell her you will give her more but you want her to try a bite of....
I have heard that kids need to try something 7-10 times before acquiring a taste for something new.
My 3 yr old used to be adventurous but is not any longer.
I keep 1/2 sandwiches with whole grain bread, turkey and cheese in the fridge. Meals are set out and she will sometimes try it, but typically "I don't like that."
She has to stay at the table, and isn't excused if she doesn't eat. When we clear the table if she hasn't eaten, she has to take a taste, and then is given a sandwich. While she eats her sandwich, the twins get fruit and I clean the kitchen. After the kitchen is cleaned, we all go up for bath. If she really wants the fruit, she'll likely inhale the sandwich. But she used to sit and pick at it. Once it's bath time and the twins are done, her food is removed and we go up. Nothing to eat until breakfast.
I personally am more concerned about food being a power struggle so don't force it. I don't engage in a power struggle I can't "win" and forcing a toddler to eat is NEVER a win for anyone! For breakfast and lunch, if she doesn't eat,she simply puts her plate on the counter when she is done, but it is re-presented at snack time. No Goldfish crackers and raisins for her until she finishes her meal! I have the blessing of the twins, and if they're eating fruit or applesauce or animal crackers, she knows she's missing out!!
She's very good about tasting everything now because she knows she just has to taste, no other expectations. Somedays she'll taste it and then decide it's more appealing than turkey and cheese!
I would definitely start off with very smalll expectations, so the reward for trying is swift. Vitamins are a great idea. My kids also drink Boost once a day.
I had to do the tough love thing after I had DD...I couldn't spend an hour trying to get him to eat while nursing/tending to DD (DH works overnights, so he's not here around for dinner time).
Once I stopped trying to force him to eat, he ate on his own. Not a lot and not every meal, but on average, more than he used to. I just put the plate out in front of him and sometimes he'll eat a few things, sometimes he'll just push the plate away and scream "NO" (he doesn't get it back), and then some days, he'll polish off the entire plate! He usually only eats pasta and tofu. He won't eat any kind of meat, with the exception of KFC chicken, or bread.
But since I started doing this, he went up from 15%ile to almost 30%ile in weight, which to us was a big deal. Meals are sooo much more stress free and doesn't seem to affect him if he skips a meal. I don't offer him snacks..but if he asks for it, I will give him a healthy snack.
I also keep Carnation Instant Breakfast packets around for days when he won't eat anything since I know for a fact he will drink his milk.
im right there with you!!! i dont have advice but wanted to say that dh and i keep saying that once ds is over his cold we are going to buckle down with him. catering is getting old..especially now that dd is here!
I appreciate all the encouragement and the suggestions.
I thought about it last night and starting next week we'll have a very structured day. We eat 5 times a day and I'll start sitting with her at the table for each meal and have the same thing. Right now I'm using meal times as a way to get things done around the house but her nutrition is more important so I just won't get stuff done until nap times.
I'm going to have a weekly menu that lists every meal instead of just dinners like we're doing right now. So we'll have a menu and I won't have to think, just grab whatever is on the list, sit down with her and we'll both eat. Or maybe I'll eat and she'll complain and watch me eat. Maybe after a few days she'll get it and start trying new things.
After the meal is over, if she doesn't want it, I'll package it up and save it for later. If she eats, she eats. If she doesn't I won't force feed her, I'm against that. But I'm done giving her a separate meal from the rest of us. She'll eat what we eat or she won't eat.
She already gets daily vitamins but I'll have to add that fiber vitamin to her diet for sure! I"ll also have to make more fruit smoothies with hidden veggies in them to compensate for what she won't be eating.
Like PP trying to force my DD just back fired, she would just resist more. Sometime I can get her to polish off her entire meal including the veggies and other times I can barely get her to take a bite. What has helped is that if she does not do a "decent" job eating her meal then it gets wrapped up and is the only thing offered for a snack should she ask for one later. Most of the time she will get it.
Also for the constipation, I have started buying the ella's kitchen and organic plum packets. Each packet is a mixture of fruit or veggies. DD loves them because she can eat them herself (they have a small plastic mouth piece so she can just suck it out). I think technically they are baby food but if it gets some fruit and veggies in her I don't mind.