Anyone esle like this?

molRN

I'm hoping I can get my thoughts down in a way that makes sense, so here it goes.

My PG was not planned at all.  DH and I were simply not preventing (or at least not regularly).  So when I got a BFP we were....shocked, but happy.  It was so nice to have it just happen and not have to agonize over "the right time", because let's face it, there seriously is never a RIGHT time.  Now with the m/c, it's like everything got thown off kilter.  Now even if we stop preventing, it's basically like trying.  I just don't like the feeling of having to start over, in every sense.  It just sucks! 

It's like, we know now how happy we can be over expecting a LO (DH had always thought that he would be really nervous, as in more so than most).  So it was a really REALLY big deal when he was not only happy, but really less scared than he anticipated.  Now the big question is do we just stop preventing again right away?  Or do we go back to waiting until after our 2yr anniversary?  I just don't know anymore.  When it just happened....it was so nice; so much simpler. 

Now it's even more complicated that it was before becasue now there we have all the questions from before about timing with the added bonus of having a history of m/c.  Like I said....so much simpler before this. 

missy418

I just lost my babies at 20 weeks due to fetal abnormalities, which at first the thought of trying again scared me, but after taking to the high risk specialist I am looking forward for the time to come where we can being trying. Trying talking to a fetal medicine doctor it might make you be prepared more in making this decision. 

MrsMitty08

We were sort of like you.  I went off birth control after August and got pregnant in October but we were totally shocked with the BFP when we found out in November because we just didn't think it would happen so fast.  I thought we'd be trying for a little while first so we definitely had the 'shock' factor but the super happy, yay-this-is-awesome feeling.  And then we miscarried in December.

What an awful, horrible feeling.

We had originally thought we would try to 'plan' our pregnancy around my job (I'm a teacher and would *prefer* a summer pregnancy) and we are planning a big move this summer, but after the miscarriage, that idea seems absurd.... We could be waiting forever if we tried to make it perfect for our schedule.  So, we have decided to go ahead and just TTC and let it happen when it is supposed to.

So, I guess what I would say to you is that it's okay to completely change your 'plan' and the feelings you had when you were pregnant were the real-deal and that tells you right there that maybe you are ready now to TTC.  If you are financially and emotionally ready, then why wait until the 2 year anniversary mark unless there were other factors that you might not have mentioned (like a cruise vacation you'd have to cancel if you were too far along or something ).

Best of luck to you and I hope you and your husband can make the decision together easily...I know for us, I wanted nothing to do with trying again for a couple of weeks after the miscarriage and then it hit me that that was all I wanted---to try again---and we are  

Fallon621

TimAnne07:

We were sort of like you.  I went off birth control after August and got pregnant in October but we were totally shocked with the BFP when we found out in November because we just didn't think it would happen so fast.  I thought we'd be trying for a little while first so we definitely had the 'shock' factor but the super happy, yay-this-is-awesome feeling.  And then we miscarried in December.

What an awful, horrible feeling.

We had originally thought we would try to 'plan' our pregnancy around my job (I'm a teacher and would *prefer* a summer pregnancy) and we are planning a big move this summer, but after the miscarriage, that idea seems absurd.... We could be waiting forever if we tried to make it perfect for our schedule.  So, we have decided to go ahead and just TTC and let it happen when it is supposed to.

So, I guess what I would say to you is that it's okay to completely change your 'plan' and the feelings you had when you were pregnant were the real-deal and that tells you right there that maybe you are ready now to TTC.  If you are financially and emotionally ready, then why wait until the 2 year anniversary mark unless there were other factors that you might not have mentioned (like a cruise vacation you'd have to cancel if you were too far along or something ).

Best of luck to you and I hope you and your husband can make the decision together easily...I know for us, I wanted nothing to do with trying again for a couple of weeks after the miscarriage and then it hit me that that was all I wanted---to try again---and we are  

This ecactly! best of luck to you!

molRN

Thanks ladies! 

We were super happy the first time, I'm sure we will be estatic if we get a BFP when we decide to stop preventing (I was given the green light to try after the first AF, so we may just go for it). 

It's so nice to know I'm not alone. 

PiperS

We were pleasantly shocked too. We were not trying at all and had only not prevented twice lol.

Now that we were expecting we desperately want to be again. I know what you mean about how easy it was the first time. We never had that feeling of waiting to take a BFP or the disappointment of it being negative. It just seemed like it was going to be perfectly easy. Now I think after AF I am going to go out and buy an ovulation kit and give it all I've got. I am desperately hoping it happens in the first month and I am anxiously awaiting AF. It is so much harder now! GL. I hope it happens for you whenever you are ready!