Insenstive MIL (vent)

Niftyroses

So, I have been holding on to this for over a week.  But I'm so mad about it I need to vent.  My MIL is a difficult person to be around, she is very negative and any problem you have, her's is always bigger or worse.  My in-laws came over the day after my MC.  

My DH called her before they came over and specifically instructed her not to talk about it.  So of course, the moment she was left alone with me, she began to tell me how disappointed she was about the MC and that she had so many plans that she wouldn't be able to do now.  She planned out a family vacation next summer when they baby would've been 1 yr.  Then she told me that if I hurried up and got pregnant again soon, that we could still go on that trip. When I told her to stop talking about it, she began to complain about her headache and my sister in law's upcoming wedding.  She then went back to whining about the MC.  I finally had to leave the room.

Maybe I'm overly emotional, but I seriously I don't want to speak to her again unless she apologizes.

Fallon621

Thats really Fvcked up!!  I mean COME ON a headache???  You lost your baby!!!  And "if you hurry up" WHAT!?!?  I would have flipped Sh!t.   Did you tell DH about this?  If so what does he think of it?  And you have every right not to talk to her and you deserve an apology!!!  I am so sorry about her ramblings (((HUGS)))

Jen&Louie

(warning: ds in sig)

I am so sorry!  I had a similar experiece with my MIL earlier this week and can completely relate.  Even if on some level she *thought* she meant well, not taking the direction to keep her mouth shut was a bad move.  How did she think guilt tripping you about a future vacation would be anything other than hurtful? I'm so sorry you had to endure all that and good for you for leaving the room.

LDW80

REALLY?  People are actually that insensitive and stupid?  REALLY?  I am so sorry you have to deal with this.  Especially from someone that is suppose to be your support system.  We are here for you though and won't give you the stupid comments you don't need to hear.

HadleyS

LDW80:

REALLY?  People are actually that insensitive and stupid?  REALLY?  I am so sorry you have to deal with this.  Especially from someone that is suppose to be your support system.  We are here for you though and won't give you the stupid comments you don't need to hear.

This exactly.  I am really sorry (((hugs))).  I hope that your husband sticks up for you, it sounds like he was trying to protect you in the first place, so that is good.  Why do some people have to be so dense!?  My mom doesn't get it with me, and I found out that she's had 2 miscarriages!

88eve88

Wow.  That's all I can say.  WOW.  I'm shocked!

I'm so sorry your MIL is being so unbelievably selfish.  I can't even fathom someone being so utterly insensitive either. 

I'm glad you were able to get up and walk away.  But don't you just want to tell her off?!?  I know I do.  It wouldn't necessarily solve anything, but it would feel so good (even for just a moment!).  Some people.  *shaking head*

 

vitan

Niftyroses:

She then went back to whining about the MC.  I finally had to leave the room.

Maybe I'm overly emotional, but I seriously I don't want to speak to her again unless she apologizes.

And keep doing it if she keeps that sh!t up. It is your God given right to protect your family and that includes the little one up in heaven. Don't let her tell you how much of a disappointment your child is. Hopefully she'll get the blatant hint. If not, at least you'll have your sanity. 

I am sorry that your MIL is such a __________. I have one too. 

Mrs.BigCountry

I am sorry for everything you are going through.  Sometimes people *think* they are making things better...

 

I MC at 17 weeks, then 4 months later my SIL MC at 5 weeks.  My MIL (SIL's mom) said "no one could understand what SIL was going through..."  and "no one deserved a baby more than SIL"    um....what?! 

 

So, my advice is keep calm and carry on.  (and vent on TB!!!) 

npilcher506

You are not being overly emotional. There is no defending that. She is soo wrong for doing that to you. I am so angry for you!! I am so sorry she felt like it was okay to talk to you like that. You did not deserve that.I think she owes you a huge apology. I am so sorry for your loss!!