What are your thoughts on this...

ktworm

How do you feel about someone else, such as a family member (brother/sister), disiplining your child or visa versa (you disiplining a niece/nephew)?  I am not talking about major things just small things like throwing a ball in the house or taking toys away from another child.  Myself, I am prefectly fine with another person doing something about it if I don't happen to be there to see it happen.  I would expect that another adult would stop my child's behavior.

FloF9

100% agree

VTbride05

Usually I am okay with it. My son knows right from wrong and if he does something wrong I want him reminded that he can't do that. Of course their are odd times that I feel like someone tells DS to do something that I normally wouldn't mind, but oh well.

ridesbuttons

I would fully expect another adult to discipline my child if I was not around to do so.  If I see something that shouldn't be happening with kids who are not mine (but in my field of authority) then I would discipline or provide direction as necessary.

 

LynnJones

Yes I hope someone would discipline my child if they saw her doing something that was wrong.  And yes if a child is in my care and I see them do something I will say something. 

But I will agree with the other poster, on occasion it has happened that someone says something to my dd about what she's doing when I think it's perfectly fine.

GracieWK

This has been on my mind a lot lately. I'm perfectly fine with other family members disciplining my kids - I expect it. But there have been times when I'm in the middle of trying to get Mitchell to do something (or not do something) and my parents will chime in also. It drives me crazy. If I'm trying to discipline my child, let me do it! He doesn't need 3 people telling him what to do all at once.

I haven't figured out how to address my parents about this issue yet, but it really drives me batty.

anna7602

It depends on the way the person does it. I have a friend who tends to get really shrilly and touchy when she disciplines her child and I literally cringe when she steps in to handle a situation with DD and her child. Where I might say to DD, "please give that toy back to him, I am going to count to five," this woman will just walk over and grab the toy out of DD's hand and say something like "it is NOT your turn!" I think it's kind of mean, personally, and I've made less play dates with her because of it.

ironmommy

I'm totally fine with it. I do have a friend who I think intervenes with our kids a little too quickly, and it always seems like my daughter is on the losing end -- as in, "Lily, give the toy to Sally," but never the other way around. Still, I don't really get too worked up about it. We're usually at her house so her rules. I'm easy.

LynnJones

anna7602:

It depends on the way the person does it. I have a friend who tends to get really shrilly and touchy when she disciplines her child and I literally cringe when she steps in to handle a situation with DD and her child. Where I might say to DD, "please give that toy back to him, I am going to count to five," this woman will just walk over and grab the toy out of DD's hand and say something like "it is NOT your turn!" I think it's kind of mean, personally, and I've made less play dates with her because of it.

Man we must have the same friend, lol.  Drives me bonkers.

EastCoastBride

DS needs to learn that they have to listen to and respect all adults.  Not just me!

momtoRaegan041008

I would expect my siblings and in-laws to discipline if I'm not readily available.  I do the same with their children.  I don't agree with spanking someone else's child though.  My Brother and SIL spank and we don't.  I would have a problem with that. 

kyfirewife

Since you said "if I don't happen to be there to see it happen", then I agree.

I don't mind someone else disciplining DD if I am not there or didn't see it happen.

If I am there, I expect to be the one to handle the situation, and not have other adults butt in.

Brewtowngrl

EastCoastBride:

DS needs to learn that they have to listen to and respect all adults.  Not just me!

My feelings also.  

Cytina

kyfirewife:

Since you said "if I don't happen to be there to see it happen", then I agree.

I don't mind someone else disciplining DD if I am not there or didn't see it happen.

If I am there, I expect to be the one to handle the situation, and not have other adults butt in.

I agree and would add another example if I'm otherwise occupied with the baby and can't get over to him to get his attention or take something away, etc.

shanatait2be

kyfirewife:

Since you said "if I don't happen to be there to see it happen", then I agree.

I don't mind someone else disciplining DD if I am not there or didn't see it happen.

If I am there, I expect to be the one to handle the situation, and not have other adults butt in.

Exactly! I posted about this a couple of weeks ago. If I am not handling it, as in I am not in the room or am not doing something about it, go for it. Please. But, BIL tends to try to handle it while DH or I are already handling it and it drives me crazy !PLus, he talks to his children in a completely different manner than we do ours, so that adds to it.