My son Ben just turned 2 in December, he's a sweet little guy but has a speech delay. He's been in speech therapy for 5 months now. He wasn't saying anything to begin with but now he has a list of a few words that he says. I'm not sure if it's been the therapy helping or if the words would have naturally occurred in those 5 months anyway, but I'm hopeful that the speech therapy is helping him. I'm a SAHM so I work really hard on his speech on a daily basis and have devoted all my time to it.I just feel like he should have progressed more by now....I think part of my disappointment is obviously my expectations and I need to adjust them but I can't help but feel like he should be saying more by now. The speech therapist says he's in the 14-16 month old range now, and he's 25 months, so he still has a delay and we're working on it. But lately Ben has just taken to screaming. It is beyond frustrating!!All he does is scream and scream all day. I know it's because he's upset that he can't tell me what he wants. But he knows sign language (which we've been working on for 5 months) and he has some words, but he chooses to scream instead of attempt to communicate. I'm on the verge of tears sometimes because I see how he's struggling and so upset he can't say the words, and I don't know what he wants and it's just such a difficult situation. I feel my patience slipping quicker than before when it comes to the screaming and I just feel like a bad mom.He follows directions very well, he has a very high receptive language, but his expressive is just so behind. He says "go", "mama", "home", "hi", "Uh-oh", "dada" and does most animal sounds and has very good pretend play with sound effects. All his vocalizations sound a little muffled so they're not the clearest except his "hi", "mama" and "dada" are clear. I'm scared something more is going on with him. I've seen three different speech therapist for evaluations, and the developmental specialist at his pediatrics office. They all seem to think he is NOT showing signs of Autism since his social skills are very good and strong, he's extremely cuddly and affectionate with all people, but the one thing about him is that he doesn't look at faces as much. It's harder to draw him up to faces and the speech therapist thinks it's keeping him from watching mouths and learning how to say words. So the whole autism thing is still always in the back of my mind. Why won't he look at faces as much? It's not like he doesn't look at faces at all, but I was a preschool teacher before and know that most kids look at faces more than he does. I'm just frustrated and feel like I'm doing all I can but it's not helping. I don't know what else to do to help him speak. I'm super patient with him and very supportive but the screaming is starting to get to me. I'm also 18 week pregnant, so it's been hard to juggle being more exhausted than usual and dealing with his frustrations.Anybody else have a non-speaking toddler? What are some strategies you think I could use with him?
Re: Non-verbal 2 year old and speech therapy frustrations and advice needed
My daughter is 21 months (next week) and has no words. I wouldn't necessarily compare my daughter because she is globally delayed with some other issues, but I wanted to recommend this program because I have heard great things about it. I just bought the book because the program was too difficult (and costly) for me to attend, but some districts offer it through Early Intervention. It's a parent education program and one of my friends attended it for both of her kids and both of their speech really took off after she took it. It's been recommended by a few other people on this board as well.
https://www.hanen.org/web/Home/HanenPrograms/ItTakesTwoToTalk/tabid/76/Default.aspx
We had DS#1 evaluated for speech through EI just before he turned 2 (like a month before). At that time he only said "ba" and "ma" and occassionally "da." He had no signs. DS was eventually diagnosed with verbal apraxia (we had him evaluated by 2 different SLP and a developmental pediatrician).
He is now 4yrs old and his speech is absolutely exploding. The last 2 years have been rough and we had moments where we never thought he would talk. However in the last 6 months this speech explosion has occurred and my child literally repeats any word you ask him to (or tries to repeat it). It's absolutely amazing. In fact, he just now started to say I love you (still brings tears to my eyes).
DS attends a pre k counts program which is an intergrated class of typical developing children as well as several who have an IEP. He still receives speech services through the IU once a week. However I've never been completely satisfied with the quality of services through the IU or through EI, so for the past 2 years he also sees a private SLP who is absolutely amazing. I credit her for a lot of the progress he has made.
You mention you are a SAHM, does your child have many opportunities to socialize? I found that for my son at least being around other children (even a little older) really seemed to have pushed him to want to talk more (or try to talk).
Best of luck,
Heather
Natural m/c 3/28/10 5w6d** Natural m/c 9/4/10 5w4d**
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First appt with RE 5/7. Testing complete. Dx: luteal phase defect
BFP 10/25/12. u/s on 11/16 confirms heartbeat
Thank you so much for your responds. I have been suspecting Apraxia of speech for about 4 months now. When we first started speech therapy I kept asking the therapist if she thinks it's Apraxia but she said there was no way to really know until he's closer to 3. I took him to the developmental specialist at the pediatricians office and again she said we can't tell until he's closer to 3 and says a few more words. Which is super frustrating because if he does have Apraxia he would need a whole different kind of speech therapy (according to my research..I think it's called PROMPT, but maybe they only do that kind of therapy when kids are 3 and older...I'm not sure)
He can't pronounce some words or sounds, only recently started repeating some words but I see him struggling to actually create the sound, he just doesn't know how. The developmental specialist recommended I enroll him in a part-time preschool to help with his speech and I've been to a couple open-houses to check them out and make a choice. I'm looking into 2 day or 3 day preschool from 9-1 and we are for sure enrolling him as soon as we can find the right fit. He has play-dates but I don't think the impact of those play-dates would be as significant as a preschool setting with kids and a teacher and most importantly, with me NOT there to decipher what he wants, he'd have to tell someone else and communicate with them!
He's currently seeing a SLP through the city (we live in Alexandria VA, and the program here is called PIE) but those services only go till he's 3, and when he's 3 he'll have to go through the school system and get an IEP. Since I'm interested in getting him into preschool, our PIE coordinator came over today to discuss the prospect of placing him in the school system now (I think it's an integrated classroom were some kids are typical and some have IEPs, they take children as young as 2) and it sounds like something we might be interested in. We would have to then pay for speech therapy on our own since you can only choose to do either PIE or the public preschool, and insurance coverage is such a joke, so it'll be pricey but I don't mind at all.
How old was your son when he got a confirmed Apraxia diagnosis? Did you place him in a typical preschool or a mixed classroom like the PIE program offers? TIA!
I feel like it's inevitable that somewhere along the line they're going to diagnose Ben with something, be it Autism, Apraxia or something else I don't know about. The Autism thing is always in the back of my mind because he won't look at faces as much, so I realize that the chance is always there. Being in this in-between stage where I don't know what's going on with him is frustrating. Everything could completely disappear and he could start talking (which I highly doubt but secretly pray and hope for) or they can diagnose him with something or the other...it's just a waiting game at this point. It's one of those trials of life that just make you realize how unpredictable life can be!
I'm pretty much in the same situation with Dory904.
I have a 4 year old who was dx at 2 with PDD NOS, he is very affectionate, loves attention and very social. His speech therapist thinks that he might have apraxia or motor planning issues. I'm also a SAHM. I have a 22 month old who is non verbal. He has no interest to talk. He has been receiving speech therapy for 6 months now and still no words. He does have sounds but no words. My little guy rather whine, cry, scream. I don't know what else to do myself. It is extremely frustrating. People say it takes time.
Sorry I can't offer any advice but you're not alone.
I also had a non-verbal two year old. After perfectly typical speech development he suddendly he stopped talking at 13 months and said absolutely nothing, tried nothing until 18 months when he would at least make some sounds. Between the time I first called EI at 22 months and when he started his first ST session he had 10 words. We did see his speech explode with therapy so we were fortunate in that case but I totally understand the screaming and wanting to go lock yourself in the bathroom.
Like a PP I was going to suggest pictures. Take all the typical things around the house that you'd like to make a bit easier for him and take pictures of them. Of course you can always print stuff off from clip art or random stuff online but personally I find actual household items that he sees to be more effective. Take pics of his favorite toys, for food I would start with something like his favorite thing or the fridge and then move on to a multitude of foods for him to pick through, a pic of his bed to tell you he's tired ect. You can take them all to kinko's and have them laminated and put on a ring so he can flip through it easily.
Also, the screaming, now I know that the mama guilt is hard and you feel horrible that he isn't able to just tell you, you feel awful that you can't understand him BUT you need to teach him that it's still not acceptable. I've been in your shoes on this one so I know it's HARD but what we did and I suggest it When DS would scream I would get down on my knees, tell him " I know you're angry and I'm sorry", I'd give him a hug and then I'd tell him " It is not ok to scream at mama, if you want to scream you can either go in your room or mama is going to walk away from you. When you are ready to stop screaming mama will do her best to help figure out what you need". And then you walk.
I know walking away seems so hard but in the long run it will better for both of you. The stress of the prolonged screaming is hard on both of you, both physically and emotionally. We know how hard it is on ourselves but we so often forget how hard it is on our kiddos too.
Another thing that helped my kid, and it seems so rediculous, was TV. We were a no TV until 2 household and I swear that there was something about listening to someone else that seemed to really help him. He wanted to share with me what is was that he was seeing, hearing. It came him more motivation it seemed. If you're not cool with TV there are tons of YouTube videos that are kid friendly and pretty educational. We really loved AlphabetFarm at that age.
My 2 1/2 year old is about in the same place speech wise as your LO- we use a lot of techniques that kids with apraxia use therapy wise with our speech therapist. For the frustration, we use a voice output device that he can use to tell us certain things like I want some yogurt, Look Mom, and so on. It has a grid on it with 16 different things you can record it to say - our speech therapist had her 3 year old record all the sayings so he really likes that it sounds like a little boy. We call people on the phone and he can use the device to talk to people and he smiles all over himself.
We also use the ipad and apps like icommunicate, tap to talk, and tapspeak. They do about the same as the assistive device. These devices and sign language have helped a lot because its really really kept the frustration down. You can program a lot of his favorite things in there so he always has a choice.
Your hard work will pay off! Don't get frustrated - its just hard and lord knows when your pregnant everything is hard!!!! I like to think all of this sucks right now but we'll blink and our LO's will be saying "I love you" like septmom posted about!
The waiting game is the worst part Same here, I have no idea what to expect or where we will be in a few years. I think a lot of us can totally relate to what you are going through!
Motor planning issues were mentioned from the EIs working with Ben a while back, partly because of some of his other issues too I guess with OT? I don't fully understand this either (what's new, right?) or how you work with them different if this is a problem??
Of course I scrutinize my 25 month old when it comes to speech too- he has words and seems to pick up new ones here and there, but still doesn't put words together and I guess I'm afraid we are going down the same path, even though he is soooo different from Ben and I think once he is in school he will do better (or I am hoping). Do you ever find yourself just hoping that one day you can have a conversation with at least one of your kids?? I know I feel like I deserve it It's so hard. All the other quirky stuff I can really deal with but I really really wish Ben could tell me what he is thinking.
My son was diagnosed with dyspraxia of speech just before he turned 2 (controversial, I know, but the SLP is still sticking with that diagnosis over a year later). His progress has been extremely slow, which is so frustrating. Just in the last couple of weeks has he been trying more to talk, though it is a lot of imcomprehensible babble. But at least he is trying. His private SLP uses PROMPT, using tactile cues to help him form sounds (for example, for the "da" sound, she'll touch under his chin because that is where the sound is formed). She tells me that with dyspraxia, repitition is key, and that the recommendation is for 2 hours of therapy a week (Zach gets 1 hour in school and one hour privately). I hear that kids with this condition typically don't speak until much later -- 4-5 years old.
We've had a lot of success using "Signing Time" videos to teach him sign language. He absolutely loves them, and his sign language vocabulary (which he actually uses to communicate) is quite substantial.
I explain dyspraxia to people as a neurological glitch, where the neurons don't talk to the muscles in the right way to get them to move to form sounds. This glitch extends further for Zach, such that he has motor planning issues for fine motor skills -- trouble using scissors, squeezing things, holding a craylon correctly, turning things. He knows what he wants to do, but can't make his hands do it.
We don't have a diagnosis beyond dyspraxia -- today I'm OK with that, but that can change from day to day.
I feel like I'm missing out on so much with my kids. I want to know what they're thinking, feeling, what happened at school, etc. It's so hard. My oldest repeats himself when we don't understand him and he gets frustrated and walks away..it just breaks my heart.
People tell me all the time that they will talk. Well I have one that wants to talk and its hard to understand him and the other who has no interest to talk. I don't understand why I have 2 kids with speech problems. They say is very common with boys too.
I know it will happen and it will take time.
I have a hard time going to family events because they don't understand what I'm going through, I would rather avoid the whole thing and get hurt because my cousins kids are all typically normal.
Just plain sucks.
Sorry I am so late in responding.
As for the apraxia diagnosis, one therapist said she was suspecting it around 2.5 (this was the therapist through EI). Our private SLP suggested it closer to 3. We saw a developmental pediatrician at 3yrs 3 months who said yes it was apraxia. She evaluated him across all domains and said that he scored on target or higher in the all the other areas except speech (at that time I think he was at 22 month level). She also recommended some type of a preschool setting. We tried the EI preschool program however it was not a good fit for my son. In this setting there were about 6 kids and he was the most verbal child based upon my observations (this was a special needs preschool). We also had a few other issues with the program that didn't sit well with me (they wouldn't let you in the classroom, they had a closed door policy, minimal communication about his day, etc). We pulled him out after 3-4 weeks in the program. This September (2 weeks before he turned 4) he started a pre k counts program which is 5 days a week for 2.5 hours per day. This is by far the best place for him. It is held in a day care setting and is integrated with typical kids and those with IEPs (for various things). He gets speech therapy there 1 time per week with another child.
As for private speech therapy, you might want to consider looking into your health insurance. My health insurance covers the cost of speech therapy so I have no out of pocket expenses. Also because of the apraxia diagnosis and receiving EI services in the past, DS qualifies for medicaid through the state (despite my income) which covers the speech therapy after my health insurance limits are exceeded (they only cover so many visits per year).
As for types of therapy, yes PROMPT is highly recommended for apraxia however finding therapists trained in it is extremely rare. Most recommendations are frequent and intense speech therapy. For a year, my son received speech therapy 3 times per week (once the IU and twice privately). This continued until he started the pre k program (because of pure logistics it wouldn't be feasible to continue it so often). So right now he receives speech therapy twice per week formally plus the school works with him on a daily basis.
We've tried a picture system (recommended by 2 different therapists) however it didn't work for my son. I've heard great sucess stories about it however as my private SLP says my son wants to talk and communicate like everyone else so he refuses to use a picture book.
HTH
Heather
Natural m/c 3/28/10 5w6d** Natural m/c 9/4/10 5w4d**
BFP: 2/27/12. u/s showed blighted ovum at 9wks Natural m/c started 4/11, cytotec 4/13/12 (at 12 wks). **
First appt with RE 5/7. Testing complete. Dx: luteal phase defect
BFP 10/25/12. u/s on 11/16 confirms heartbeat
Kiddo just turned two and only says "up," "da," and "yes and no" (which just happened in the last week; before that it was uh-uh). He's been in ST through EI since 19 months or so (twice a week). Both the SLP who evaluated him and his current SLP think apraxia is a possibility (especially since his receptive is above his age level and he doesn't repeat or attempt to repeat sounds). Of course, it will be a while before that can be made official.
We've been pretty lucky thus far that he's a pretty laid back kid - I was expecting much more in terms of tantrums by this point. I think it helps to remember that while a speech delay can certainly contribute to frustration, it's 100% normal toddler behavior to deal with tantrums and screaming. Kiddo has been having "2 moments" more in the last few weeks. Mostly I try to stay calm, help him verbalize what he's feeling (like "I know you are mad because..."), and try to give him choices that can "fix" the situation (like "we can't do X now but you can do Y or Z"). I found the book Playful Parenting helpful in thinking about how to approach toddler "issues." So far, it's worked well for us.
We had our 2 year check up this week. I was more than a little irritated because when I asked about the next steps in getting a diagnosis for his speech issues, the only thing the guy brought up (our regular pedi is out on maternity leave) was getting screened for Autism. Not that I think it's bad to get screened, but no one who has worked with him thus far feels that it's likely he's on the spectrum. So...yeah...some frustration there. As for the faces thing, obviously I'm no expert but there are lots of reasons he might not look at faces - one being two year olds aren't particularly attentive! I'm one of those people who has "wandering eyes" when I talk to people - yet I was an early talker and I'm not autistic - just trying to say that doesn't necessarily mean anything one way or the other.
Anyway, all that is to say I understand the frustration (and our kiddo's frustrations!). I find it helpful to focus on all the things he does, instead of the talking he doesn't do. He's really good at communicating in other ways (and that's really without even using official sign language) so we focus on that. And I treat him just like I'd treat him if he were 2 and using tons of words. If kiddo has one of those "I'm just going to scream" moments, I just keep talking to him (sort of narrating the situation for him) and generally that gets him refocused on trying to communicate what it is that he wants.
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