I've lost control of my life.....

Crystal318

Are these feelings normal? Do I have PPD?  My baby is almost 12 weeks old and I have definately done my share of crying since he was born. He had severe complications at birth and was in the NICU for 17 days and then we got him home and my fiance was not a great help at all (he is 100% better now) not to mention he was struggling with some addiction issues which stresses me out to no end. Just when I started feeling somewhat "normal" I fell down the stairs and broke my foot two days before Christmas. I feel completely out of control. I want to be able to work out and feel good about myself again, I want to be able to drive my car, to walk up my stairs, clean my house, take care of my baby by myself, I feel like my bills are piling up, my body is no where near where it used to be, my relationship with my fiance is suffering, I dont fit in with my friends, I just feel so overwhelmed. I feel so selfish and I feel like I should just be thankful for what I have and thankful that my baby is ok and I feel petty to be worrying about all this other crap. Dont get me wrong, I am more than thankful that my baby is ok and I feel like the luckiest mom in the world but as far as the rest of my life goes....I just dont feel like ME anymore.

Hanginginthere2010

Doesn't sound like PPD to me, but hey I'm no expert.  Just sounds like you're dealing with a lot of stressors at the moment.  I have gone through 2 surgeries since my LO was born so I completely understand the feeling of just wanting to be able to take care of your baby.  Its very frustrating!  And hon, my body is no where near where it used to be and yes that does take a toll on self esteem but we gotta remember that it took 9 months to get that away so we should give ourselves some slack and patience.  We'll get to where we need to be in time.  Took my sister a year to get back to where she was before her baby so I'm not really stressing about myself. 

You got back to feeling normal and then, boom!  You broke your foot.  Just remember everything is going to be fine, in time.  I was miserable after my surgeries and its so frustrating that you can't just take care of your baby like you want, but time will heal and you'll be the mom you want to be.  Sucks for now but you will heal and be better.  I got through my surgeries, hated it for awhile after each, and now I've recovered.  You will too  

totallyshocked

I agree. Im not an expert either but you seem like you maybe are a little depressed or experiencing baby blues. With post pardum nothing seems the same, u feel unattached to your baby, you can or cant sleep, cant eat and have a lot of bad thoughts( not always intense like hurting ur baby or you, but worries and fears). To be safe I would go talk to someone tho. Good luck