facebook status

lauren.cus

I've been avoiding facebook at all costs the past couple days. My husband and I have posted all my u/s pictures and a lot of my status updates pertain to my pregnancy. I just haven't known how to handle it. I grew up as a military brat and moved around my entire life, so my facebook is filled with close friends and family that live far away. Many of them hadn't heard the news yet, so this morning I faced my biggest fear and wrote a facebook note to everyone. I know it's just a small step, but I feel like it was one of many small steps in the right direction. I feel like so much weight was lifted off my shoulders as soon as I hit publish. 

 How are you ladies doing today? Has anyone else taken a big step towards moving on? How did it make you feel? Hope you girls are doing better today. 

 

My Facebook Note:

For all of you that have reached out to us this past week, words cannot express our depth of gratitude. Alex and I have been so incredibly touched by just the outpouring of love and support we have received from our friends and family. Your words have been a comfort and warmed our hearts and meaningful gifts, bouquets of beautiful flowers, and homecooked meals have filled our home with such joy and love during this time. We cannot thank you enough. It's in the darkest times that you're able to witness what joy and comfort God provides through friends and family. For those of you that have not yet heard, Tuesday morning we said goodbye to our beautiful baby. God gave us 12 amazing weeks to fall in love and become forever parents and they were the most fulfilling 12 weeks of our lives. We know God can see the bigger picture and has a plan for everything that happens. It's with his strength and peace along with the love and support of all of you that well take those first steps forward. Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.

Alex & Lauren 

kgshuber

So sorry for your loss...but your FB status is beautiful!  I feel the same way, God has had His hand on me through this whole process and my faith (and love) is stronger because of it.  I am glad that the FB status has helped you feel better...hopefully it will help others as well.

npilcher506

Wow. That is amazing! It even made me feel better. Heres to a new year!!

lavril

I'm so proud of you!  That was a HUGE step forward.  Your message was beautiful and I hope it helps you feel better and move forward.  I haven't made any major strides, except boxing up the maternity clothes my sister gave me, and putting other baby related things into the tote as well (including the u/s picture, pregnancy journal, etc).  It was to hard to look at them everyday.  I hope this gets easier for us.  *hugs*

alexa08

npilcher506:

Wow. That is amazing! It even made me feel better. Heres to a new year!!

 I'll second that. Lovely.  Thank you for sharing.

fireflies0306

that is a wonderful status, and i'm so glad you made this huge step forward!

I struggle with fb too--and it took us a week, b/c we were public about the pregnancy on there too, to post about our little boy.  I am taking a fb hiatus right now though...i just can't handle the posts!  and if i continue hiding and unfriending i'll have no one left (and its all friends and family that aren't nearby, or that i don't seen or talk to often).  

but that is great that you are moving on--just one step at a time!!! 

lauren.cus

Thank you ladies!! It's amazing how much I've come to love you girls in just 3 days!:) I'm so happy to hear this made some of you feel a little better. Together, one step at a time, we'll all carefully close the door on 2010 and ring in the new more promising year! 

 

lavril:

 I haven't made any major strides, except boxing up the maternity clothes my sister gave me, and putting other baby related things into the tote as well (including the u/s picture, pregnancy journal, etc).

 This was an incredibly major stride! I'm so proud of you as well!! I haven't been able to face this one yet...I've just placed everything in the nursery to be, closed the door, and ran. Each day that we make these steps to protect and heal our heart we become closer and closer to becoming whole again. You've inspired me to open that door back up...or at least allow myself to walk by the room:)

 

fireflies0306:

I struggle with fb too--and it took us a week, b/c we were public about the pregnancy on there too, to post about our little boy.  I am taking a fb hiatus right now though...i just can't handle the posts!  and if i continue hiding and unfriending i'll have no one left (and its all friends and family that aren't nearby, or that i don't seen or talk to often).  

I am so sorry you've had to feel the FB fear. There is just something so vulnerable about it. It's like your entire life is just in black and white for everyone to open up whenever they please. I think taking a hiatus takes just as much strength! You're taking the time you need to heal. And don't you worry, I have unfriended so many people these past couple days that there may be no one even left to read my status. You can always add them back later:)

LDW80

Wow, what a beautiful note.  I am so glad that you were able to make that step.  I am not there yet.  I was a facebook junkie, mostly getting on 5-6 times a day to check other people's status', not so much me always putting stuff down, but anyway I have avoided FB like the plague.  I actually went on there the other day and hid all my fb friends that were pregnant so I didn't have to read their status' about what is going on in their pregnancy.  I didn't want to defriend them because that is not fair to them and I am just not like that but hiding them for now will help.  I haven't told anyone on there yet that I miscarried (I made my pregnancy announcement @ 9wks) and I don't plan to make an announcement either.  When people ask about how I am doing I will just private message them. 

But again I am very happy you feel better and feel a weight lifted off your shoulder.  That is a huge step.  Take Care of yourself!

ewilliams1127

npilcher506:

Wow. That is amazing! It even made me feel better. Heres to a new year!!

 

I second that!

WifeyWynn0626

That was a very huge step you made! I let my DH take over the FB detail because I couldn't do it on my own. This week was the first post I made on there since my loss and it was to thank everyone for their thoughts and support, since everyone flooded my FB after DH announced it. My biggest step was packing all the stuff away in a box, which took me two days because every time I started, I lost it. But, like a PP said, it's nice to not have all the reminders laying around.

clarks415

I did the same thing Lauren. I avoided FB like the plague for the first 4 days I was home. I did the same thing, posting a thank you of prayers and support to our family and friends. I knew it would be incredibly emotional for me to read the comments and messages from friends and family. But once I did it did feel like a weight was lifted from me. It felt good to get out some of the cries that I guess I'd been avoiding, or atleast prolonging to have. 

I have been slowly messaging back everyone who had sent me messages and comments. It has been theraputic in a way. To share me story with some, and thank others for sharing their experience. It also has brought on a lot of tears but I feel like it is helping me heal. I have been doing a few a day and hope to continue until I have gotten back to everyone.

 Today I have been having a jealousy phase. I have been hearing a lot of pregnancy announcements and pictures of new births. I am trying to remind myself that God has a plan for me, I hope I can see it soon. 

lavril

lauren.cus:

Thank you ladies!! It's amazing how much I've come to love you girls in just 3 days!:) I'm so happy to hear this made some of you feel a little better. Together, one step at a time, we'll all carefully close the door on 2010 and ring in the new more promising year! 

 

lavril:

 I haven't made any major strides, except boxing up the maternity clothes my sister gave me, and putting other baby related things into the tote as well (including the u/s picture, pregnancy journal, etc).

 This was an incredibly major stride! I'm so proud of you as well!! I haven't been able to face this one yet...I've just placed everything in the nursery to be, closed the door, and ran. Each day that we make these steps to protect and heal our heart we become closer and closer to becoming whole again. You've inspired me to open that door back up...or at least allow myself to walk by the room:)

Thank you!  I had my mom help me b/c I didn't think I could do it on my own.  The first thing I did was throw everything into one giant pile and shut the door.  Then a couple days later, I had my mom come in and help.  I handed her piles of things and she folded them neatly and put them into a new plastic tote.  Now that the tote is safely away in the closet, I opened the door back up.  I can walk by the room without crying.  Maybe someday I'll even go inside.  I agree that all these little steps are our way of protecting our heart.  As we continue to heal, we can continue to put the pieces back together.  Good luck with your healing journey!