Would you look different if you were divorced?

Jodi&Joe

I was just (randomly) thinking how I would look different if I was divorced.  I would chop my hair and add a lot of funk (color/style) to it.  I would get my nose pierced and likely get at least one more tattoo (if not more).

Those are just the things that stick out at me but I'm guessing there might be more.

So then I was thinking "Why don't I look this way while married too?"  I mean, am I stuck in a suburban level of conformity?  Do I owe it to my husband to not alter my looks to that level.  (He does NOT want me to get my nose pierced, to get another tattoo and the hair -- eh, he probably wouldn't care/would like it (and this one I may do anyway)).

Then I realized that I think people, in general, tend to look different when they get divorced.  Most (from what I have seen anyway) tend to lose weight (they say it's the stress).  That's one change.  But I have noticed that women tend to change their hair style, start dressing differently, etc.

So, would you look different if you got a divorce?  Would you change your style of clothing?

And if the answer is yes, why DON'T you do that now? 

hcmamm1

I would probably dress a little more sexy.  Right now I dress for comfort.  Also i would get a tattoo. My dh does not want me to get one.

Mominator

In my case, I DO look different

 Since my seperation, I have lost 80lbs, cut and colored my hair, started wearing make-up on a daily basis, I try to be put together every time I leave the house which includes buying myself new clothes and changing my overall style. Why did I not do this stuff before? Probably because I was so beat down emotionally and mentally that I just didn't give a rats a$$ what I looked like.

DevonPow

I would probably not look as good - right now being a SAHM allows me to go to the gym every day, plus my DH is a good guy with my clothes shopping budget the only thing I can think of would be a boob job- I would love one but DH is horrified by the thought.

r9stedt

Mominator:

In my case, I DO look different

 Since my seperation, I have lost 80lbs, cut and colored my hair, started wearing make-up on a daily basis, I try to be put together every time I leave the house which includes buying myself new clothes and changing my overall style. Why did I not do this stuff before? Probably because I was so beat down emotionally and mentally that I just didn't give a rats a$$ what I looked like.

This.  except 15 pounds, and i gained 10 of those back in the past year!!

exH would never allow me to buy new clothes, so I was stuck in a slump of frumpy clothes that didn't fit correctly.   Why put on make up when you are told you never look pretty?

mlm1128

I'm sure I would...but not for the better!  I would be the definition of stressed out single mother with no time for herself.

goodheartedmommy

I don't think so. I generally try to make myself look nice. I like looking sexy/attractive, and not just for my husband or to attract a man. I just feel better when I look nice.

lizard76

I don't think I'd change much.  I've made an effort to still dress nicely (85% of the time) and have gotten back in the habit of wearing make-up/looking good even on days I'm home and not at work.  My hair might get cut a bit shorter, but I keep it long b/c DH likes it that way.  I still might trim it a bit before the baby comes...he just doesn't like it super short.

Purrrfect433

Yes, I think I probably would, too. I've actually been thinking about this a lot lately because the woman I work for is a 35 year old single mom and she's pretty fabulous. Although I'm 6 years younger than her, I feel like I dress 6 years OLDER than her. She wears really sexy underwear, too, which I don't. I've been wearing granny panties since Ben was born. And shabby ones at that! I started buying myself fancy underwear lately and it makes a world of difference;)

KrisBriMcBunny

The only thing happen was I lost weight due to the stress of domestic violence.  Nothing else changed at least physically. I did get more outgoing.

cnybride2be

goodheartedmommy:

I don't think so. I generally try to make myself look nice. I like looking sexy/attractive, and not just for my husband or to attract a man. I just feel better when I look nice.

this. 

SumnerBride

I too would probably dress a little bit sexier.  Sad, but I don't do that for my husband.  I might cut my hair shorter-he likes it long.  I wouldn't color my hair, or pierce anything.  I might lose weight, but probably not.  I've worked really hard to get where I'm at, and that isn't skinny.

Glendi2.0

DevonPow:

I would probably not look as good - right now being a SAHM allows me to go to the gym every day, plus my DH is a good guy with my clothes shopping budget the only thing I can think of would be a boob job- I would love one but DH is horrified by the thought.

Ditto to the word.

Bellisimo

I'd probably look the same but would probably drop weigh due to stress, anxiety and general sadness.  Maybe I'd attempt to manage that stress and anxiety by supplementing in more exercise...then maybe I'd be more buff.  Or sick looking.  One or the other.  I'd dress the same, have the same hair, etc.

expectingnothing

I'm in that transition now.  I had intially lost some weight but just gained it back.  I did get a whole new wardrobe as I'm also transitioning from SAHM to entering back into the business world.  I'm basically reverting to what I looked like before I had kids actually.

cooker71

LOL...besides happier? No. I look pretty much the same.

expectingnothing

cooker71:

LOL...besides happier?

 

LOVE THIS!

Mrs Manners

I think I would be more fit. Right now, I work full time and dh works 3 jobs so he almost never sees ds and has zero time to help with anything other than work. So I'm basically the sole caretaker and have very little time to work out. Prior to him taking the third job, I worked out 4-6 days a week and was 8 lbs lighter and had more muscle tone. I'm going to make it a resolution to try to find time anyway, but if we were divorced and had shared custody, I'd have time to myself where I don't now.

I'd also buy better underwear (not sure why I don't now) and I'd get a mani/pedi regularly (I don't now just because I have no free time).

UGAbride

No, there isn't anything I'd really do differently if I wasn't married, I try with hair, makeup and wardrobe as best I know how already   I lost all the weight I needed to before this pregnancy, and plan to do it again after the baby comes with diet/exercise.  I like to do it for me, and for hubby to be proud of me as well.

kertybird

Nope, but I have to look professional for work and then I am in Jeans and a t-shirt on the weekends....I don't think I would ever change that.

KRISTA555

I can answer this very easily, because I have been divorced twice. (Yeah, yeah, you read that right)...  and both times I lost a ton of weight and looked pretty hot.

My problem is that I lose weight when I'm depressed (no appetite), and I gain weight when I'm happy (I blame my mom for always feeding me to celebrate happy occassions..lol!).

I must be really happy with my current (and final!) hubby, because I weigh the most now that I have ever weighed.

karen6784

No.  I am anti mom-hag by definition.  Most people would consider me a girly girl.  I have carried a purse everyday for as long as I can remember.  It is very rare for me to leave the house without makeup on. 

My philosophy is if you look good, you feel good.  No matter how busy a woman is, she can always take a few minutes to take care of herself.  

happ17

the only thing I'd think would be different would be my weight--I'd probably eat better and make time to exercise. Other than that, I do what I want anyway--I have a nice wardrobe, I already have the piercings I want (ears, nose, etc) and I get my hair done however I want to--DH doesn't care as long as I'm happy and it's not a pixie cut (which would look bad on me right now anyway).

I do slum around on weekends and when I'm off work--I have to dress up for work so I take advantage of it when I'm not working--but when we go out and stuff, I do make an effort to look nice. 

CleoKitty

No, probably not. I'm a very casual person who likes to look nice when it matters but comfort & practicality are always my first priority. I was this way when I was single in my 20s and I'm still the same way as a married 30-something.

To be honest, if I was to get divorced, I would have zero interest in any romantic relationships until my kids are older so I wouldn't be going over and above in the effort department just to impress/attract someone.