New here, not sure what to do.
preciousmetal
member
After two children, I am not feeling like myself. I don't feel like going anywhere ever. I spend every weekend sitting on the couch, watching tv, or cleaning our house which can never be clean enough for me. The smallest things set me off these days. I can go from totally fine to totally sobbing or screaming pissed so fast that it surprises even me. My sex drive is completely in the toilet and all my husband does is pester me about it.
I can't help it - I can't turn off this part of me.
I worry every second of the day that my kids are going to be hurt, or even die. I get up out of bed several times a night just to be sure that they are still breathing. I even have these horrible thoughts....not that I would ever hurt my kids, but the thoughts are there...and I can't help but think that I must be crazy for allowing my brain to even manufacture such an image.
After a little research, I feel that I need to speak to my doctor about PPA/PPD. I tearfully brought this up to my husband on Friday night. His response was, "What is a doctor going to do for you?"
Is all of what I am feeling normal, or should I see a doctor?
Re: New here, not sure what to do.
A doctor can do a lot for you. That's just totally unsupportive and I'm sorry he responded that way. It takes a lot of courage to come to that realization and admit it to someone else. He needs to grow up.
Your feelings aren't "normal" but they don't make you crazy either. You are not alone. I could have typed a lot of those same words. I have felt those exact same things.I totally understand not being able to control the images that come into your head, loss of interest in everyday things, serious mood swings. Please do see a doctor. I promise you it gets better but you have to ask for help. :::hugs:::
Owen Matthew 11/1/2009 4lbs 10oz 16.5in
Born 5 weeks early by C/S | Severe Pre-Eclampsia
BFP #2 5/1/2011 | M/C @ 7 weeks | D&C 5/25/2011
TTC #2 | HSG Clear | SA 2% Morph otherwise great
3 failed Femara/TI cycles moving on to IUI
I felt the same as you for many months. I had ups and downs so much that it was confusing on what was really going on. Then I realized it was probably PPD. I was in denial for a few months but then realized it was hurting me and my family greatly. It took a lot of courage for me to go to my doctor and admit this. But her reaction was so validating, supportive, and with great understanding. She explained that "I was not crazy", this happens to many moms. My doctor sat and listened to me for 45 minutes. I was so greatful that I went in and talked to her. She put me on Celaxa two weeks ago. Immediately I felt different! I didn't feel like I was going to crawl out of my skin anymore! I had more patients and less anxiety. It improves everyday. In January I am going to see a counselor just to have a person to vent to who is non-judegemental.
Good luck with your journey and do what your gut is telling you! HUGS!!