How did you agree on a name?

PiscesFish

I am 32 weeks pregnant, and we can't shake the feeling the baby is coming sooner than that. And we cannot decide on a name.  At all. 

I am so frustrated because I HAD a list of names at the start that I loved, and DH hated them all.  So that leaves us looking for second best, and after 6 freaking months... we're turning up unsuccessful.

 I need to pick your brains - where did you get your names?  Having had all mine shot down, I'm looking at baby name books, online lists (looking for a good site that generates random names or mashes two together), and still nothing.  It's becoming a source of heated arguments, in our marriage and with our extended families as well.  My freaking 14 year old sister would have a name for baby if she got PG tomorrow! 

 Since we both have "Emma-and-Aiden" type names, we're set on the idea of a nontraditional name.  That does not get our son's azz kicked and/or does not limit his professional choices to drag queen and tattoo artist.

Help me out, name gurus. 

HannahO28

does your husband suggest names? Sometimes guys shoot down a ton of names, but don't have any suggestions themselves. If that's the case, you should make him throw some names out. 

I would suggest looking in areas of your life for names. My husband and I love movies so a lot of names on our list have come from our favorite actors or movie characters. We're also relgious, so some of our names come from the Bible. What are things you have in common with your husband that you can draw names from? Like... Do you both love nature? A particular author? A city? A family member? are you into history? 

Here's my boy's list:

Elias

Vincent

Clive

Gideon

Gabriel

Phillip

Jude

James

Xavier

Also, if you list some names on here that you love and names that your husbands love, the regulars on this board are really good about throwing out suggestions that match both styles.  

EwokofEndor

We just started TTC, so I haven't been in your shoes yet but it sounds like there might be too many opinions going around. If your extended family is constantly weighing in on each name, there is always going to be one person that isn't happy with a certain name. Maybe try keeping the discussion between you and DH?

 

Also, I agree with pp, have your DH come up with some names of his own, instead of always turning them down.

MichelleL1118

Uh, we have ~3 weeks until our LO arrives, and he doesn't have a name yet, although we're working on it.  DH didn't have suggestions, and wasn't really willing to go through baby name books, websites, etc.  So I made a list of names I was willing to consider - some of my top choices were on it (even ones he'd previously vetoed) along with the one or two decent names DH actually suggested and several others that were "OK" that I came across in the books, online, etc.  Ended up with 18 names.

Now, we're in the process of narrowing it down.  We both have total veto power on the list, and can cross names off at will... three have been eliminated so far (one that DH suggested, two of my favorites due to DH's students and a friend who just named her baby one of them).  By the weekend, I'm hoping to have the list down to 10, and by Christmas down to 5 (or less... or even have a name chosen). 

Becky262

I got fed up with fighting over names too, so I put DS's name to a vote

I had DH come up with a list of names, combined his with my list of names.  We individually scored each name 1-5, the name with the highest combined score was the winner

Not very romantic but it was a name we both agreed on and could live with

cearleyjay

i was so sick of fighting over emails. we had a named picked before he left and that went down the drain.  so we fought back and forth for months.  it was about to weeks until my induction and i finally said thats it!  i switched up everything. i threw out the middle name we were going to use and chose to use his grandpas name instead of my dads name.  james and michael are kinda one in the same. overly popular, but work for a middle name.  i know my dad is kinda bummed but he thinks my DS is name after stone wall jackson. so he got excited either way.

my suggestion  

Gavin

i really like PP with Elias (spelling?)

 

 

completelyundefinable

DH was the first one to start throwing out ideas. There were only 3 girl names that he really liked. Thankfully I loved all of them so that made it a little easier.

I don't know what we'll do if we ever have a boy because we could not agree on anything.

pms1

With my girls my H and I had an agreement he would pick a first name, and I would pick a middle, and w/ the second one he got to pick the middle name, and I got to pick the first name. He likes the more traditional names, and I like the more unique. If you haven't already looked at it babywizard.com is a good name website.

PiscesFish

EwokofEndor:

We just started TTC, so I haven't been in your shoes yet but it sounds like there might be too many opinions going around. If your extended family is constantly weighing in on each name, there is always going to be one person that isn't happy with a certain name. Maybe try keeping the discussion between you and DH?

 

Also, I agree with pp, have your DH come up with some names of his own, instead of always turning them down.

We are keeping the discussion and name vetting between us (source of contention #1) .  Our relatives keep suggesting stuff and getting p!ssy when we don't get excited and commit to that name on the spot. People are also getting angry that we haven't chosen a name yet, which makes me angry because I don't feel like they have a right to get angry with me for how/when I make a decision about MY child.

Nanna

My Dh would never make suggestions, just shoot mine down.  So I got him a baby name book and put it in the bathroom with a piece of paper and a pen (captive audience!!).  Over the course of a week or so he started making up a list of names he came across that he liked.  I did the same.  Then we went through each other's lists.  If either of us had a name that the other didn't completely hate, it went on the list.  We actually called it our "I don't hate it list"!  We got a list of about 10-15 contenders narrowed down and that was good enough for us.  At the hospital, after we had a chance to meet and get to know our sons, we then chose their final names, and it was easy because the one that fit them best was clear.

LIAngel

DH shot down all my suggestions for girls names.   Except for one.   When I said "Well how about Ava? (silently praying he'd agree since I love the name so much)".   He said "Hmmmm like Ava Gardner.  I like it".   So for all DH knows, we are honoring an old time actress and I get to name my DD my 1st choice name. 

ohfour

I would go here: https://www.ssa.gov/OACT/babynames/

Pull up the top 1000 names and make him go through and highlight anything that sounds nice to him. Maybe see if you like any of the ones he highlights as well?

NicoleWright8

My first choice was Aaron. I like the biblical names and knew a couple Aarons who were really smart and well-mannered. DH vetoed it since we already know an Aaron. So I suggested using it for a middle name and he agreed. Then we just had to decide on a first name to go with it, which was no easy task. He vetoed my favorites and every name he suggested I hated. I finally threw Nicolas out there and he said he kind of liked it. I wasn't 100% on it because I didn't like it spelled with an h (my name is Nicole and I always hated when people would spell it with an h) and I didn't like Nick for short. So we decided to go with it and spell it Nicolas and call him Nico for short. It wasn't at the top of either of our lists, but it works.