NBR

scarlett29

Here's a little back story -- I have known my bestfriend since the day she was born, our dads grew up together and we have been insepertable ever since, spent every vacation together, spent the whole summer together as kids going back and forth from my house to hers, we went on every vacation together and grew up together. She is like my sister.in early july (about) she moved into my apartment because her mom was moving away to a different state to get married and she wanted to stay here. She moved in with my and BF ( me and BF have been together for over 6 1/2 years and have lived together for like 4 1/2) well she moved into our small apartment with us, and at first everything was going great, we were hanging out together all the time and hung out by the pool all afternoon ect. everything was normal.

Then i found out i was pregnant, just a few short weeks later. things were still good, but we didn't hang out as much mostly just at night if we were just home together, we never like made plans. and partically i feel like its because i can't drink and i guess that makes me un-fun now. And then it just got horriable. It was horriably ackward and my hormones were haywire and i was upset all the time. We barley even speak to eachother now and now she is moving out, and it is so werid. Shes moving like this week she should be all out by thursday. I was pissed about somethings, but now, today i just feel so incrediably sad. I feel like im losing my bestfriend, I feel like once she really leaves we wont speak to eachother anymore and it really hurts and i feel like all of this came along because im pregnant. Iv tryed to talk to her about it and how i want to stay friends and she just says We will, but i just know we wont, she barely even looks at me. Its gotten to the point where i dont want to be home when she is because i just feel uncomfortable and sad. 

I just feel horriable, i guess i'm a little depressed over it. And it sucks because i feel like i don't see anyone else anymore now that im pregnant and that I have no more friends. Please, do not get me wrong, im not depressed that i am pregnant or having a baby, im really happy i am and i actually can't wait until he comes out and we can start our life as a family, im just say about all of these side effects with my friends and more importantley my bestfriend. Everyone warns you about what is going to happen to your body and in labor and how babys are as new borns but no one tells you want happeneds to you relationships and your family and how your whole life gets flipped upside down. I just feel like she should be here for me, never once has she asked me how i am feeling or anything baby related.. 

I guess im just venting and looking for some uplifting advice or words out here on the bump. dont hate me for all the spelling mistakes either pleaseeee 

jarobinson21

By best friend moved in with DH and I a couple years ago. She lived with us for about a year. It was good for a little while, but quickly became unbearable. I ended up asking her to move out. For a little while we didn't talk much, but now we are friends again. We don't spend as much time together as we did before. Partly because of me being pregnant and not hanging out with anyone really. And also because she moved an hour away for Grad school. 

Living with a friend can be straining on the relationship, but as long as you have been friends I doubt that short period will permanently damage your friendship. Just give it some cooling off, and I sure she will be more than happy to come see your little one. 

shaysmom05

Sometimes friends just need a break from each other. I had my best friend stay with me for a couple weeks and we wanted to kill each other by the end of it.

Unfortunately, some friendships will fade after you have kids. That's one that I had to learn the hard way. I say give her some time and just try to communicate every so often. If the bad feelings last and she doesn't want to be friends, then call it as that. It's hard to deal with, but these are some of the changes that come with starting a family.

I really hope that isn't the case and things do work out for you. GL!

heathert323

I know exactly how you feel. My best friend since practically birth and I have just parted ways. We had radically different lifestyles that really came to the surface after I found out I was pregnant. I'm sure your friend will come around. You don't seem to have too much of a lifestyle difference, and she could also be feeling like she is interfering with your growing family. I'm sure once she moves out and gets settled, things will get better. She, as well as you, need to take time to adjust. It'll all work out.

heylee

I think you should tell her how you feel. Don't let a few arguments ruin your friendship. I think it's good she's moving out though, it's time.

LynsiBHM

isn't it awful that you have to ask people not to tear you down for grammatical mistakes? Unless your post is completely moronic, who cares??

Anyway, I'm really sorry you're going through this.  I feel the same way sometimes. Most of my work friends are young (newly graduated, single, living in the city, etc.) and I'm in a house in the burbs, married for 3 yrs, and prego.  I don't go out with them for drinks after work and miss out on all the fun stories that they are all talking about the next day... 

That being said, I still have my best friend(s), even though our relationships have changed a bit.  I obviously don't go out drinking/ dancing and things that we used to do, but we make a point to do dinner, movies, shopping, etc. instead.  Your friend should support you and be there for you!

I'm sure it's different living together. I personally have a hard time living with most people. Is there more to the story? Have you been fighting or anything, or did you just start to grow apart?  It sounds like she is practically family- in which case i'd hope that you two can get through this.  Maybe she is jealous of your life.. starting a family, etc.  Maybe she resents you for offering to be roomies, then getting pregnant and getting lame (no offense... i'm just saying maybe she sees it that way?) Or maybe she has other things going on in her life and just feels that you are more into your growing family than your friendship (as well you should, right now.)

I think you need to have an open converstaion with her. You feel like you're losing her and you're sad, but she likely feels the same way. Her mom just moved away from her, and now you're moving on with your life in a way too.  Just talk to her and let her know that you still value your friendship. Things may change, but that's life.

Good luck!!

 

scarlett29

thanks for all your words guys very much apperciated..,

we havent really been fighting, its more like the silent treament which i think is worse that a full blown fight.. Its just werid, it almost feels like theres a elephant in the room when we are both together..

I guess i will just let it go and see what happeneds.. thanks tho everyone!! 

scarlett29

cruelsound:

LynsiBHM:

isn't it awful that you have to ask people not to tear you down for grammatical mistakes? Unless your post is completely moronic, who cares??

So, do you want to be the one to tell her how to spell horrible or do you want me to do it?

Considering this board has a spell check, it's a bit lazy to not use it.

 

 

uhmmm no google crome does not have spell check but don't worry ill be sure to judge you on all of your spelling and punctuation in the future .. thanks!