Dr. office vent: WWYD? (Long)

lovelyTX

So, I love my Dr, but I have had some recent issues with my nurse (who I have to primarily work with in between visits). I am NOT the type to call about every little thing, but I have had a couple of small health matters come up and have had my confidence shaken by her consistently. Am I crazy or am I right to feel this way? What would you do about this?

1. In my genetic screening, nurse asks me what symptoms I've been having. I told her my PG has been really great so far, no nausea etc. just a little cramping, insomnia, and lower backache. She told me that there is no way I could be having lower backache this early related to pregnancy and it must be related to something else. I said, "Oh, really, well, I'd read that it was a symptom..." and she shot me down and kind of made me feel stupid for thinking I could be having a lower backache this early on, even though its onset was in the 5th or 6th week and was not something I'd dealt with before. I come home and of course confirm that it's in all the books, all over the Internet as a first trimester symptom!

2.  At our 12 wk visit, she couldn't find the HB with the doppler. I start to freak out a little bit, and she doesn't really reassure me, she just says, well, guess you're going to get your ultrasound after all! (I'd come in thinking we were doing one...but god of course all I cared about at that point was the HB!!). Of course, on the U/S baby looked great and had a nice, fast HB. But she had to have known that something like that would be very scary for us!

3. At the 12 week visit I'd explained to both the nurse and my Dr. that I'd had some PG-related gingivitis, and it was causing me excruciating pain when I ate/drank anything, and that I was going to the dentist the next day. Dr. said it's probably just the PG gingivitis (likely not a more serious dental issue) but good to get it checked out. Dentist says it's possibly sinus infection-related - the cavity caused some additional swelling on my already sensitive gums which is why it was extra painful - and that I could take amoxicillin in case there's an infection and anbesol for now if I'm in a lot of pain. I called my dr. just to run it by them. Nurse calls back and questions why I would need anbesol if it's sinus infection related? She doesn't understand the "linkage". I said...because any time I eat or drink it's shooting pain up into my eyeballs and giving me excruciating headaches and I'd love to numb it if it's safe...again, makes me feel stupid for asking to use it.

 4. I came down with full-blown stomach flu yesterday, not keeping down water, food, very very weak and ill. Called the nurse, even though I know these things just need to run their course, I needed to know what to look out for in case of severe dehydration, baby's safety etc. I still haven't heard back from her, 24 hours later!

What would you do? Ugh, sorry I know this was long. I don't really trust my dr.'s office anymore, even though I really love my Dr! I was positive that even if she did call me back about the stomach flu, she'd tell me it was just morning sickness (even though it was accompanied by diarrhea and I've not had a single bout of nausea the entire first trimester - I'm now 13 weeks). Should I tell my Dr? Am I overreacting? Thanks for your input!! 

 

DowagerCountessofNJ

Can you call and leave a message for your doctor to discuss your concerns with him directly?

I would definitely bring up my concerns regarding her behavior at your twelve week appointment.  If you don't like the way your doctor handles your concerns you may want to consider finding another practice.

kygirlintx321

Sgt M's Wife:

Can you call and leave a message for your doctor to discuss your concerns with him directly?

I would definitely bring up my concerns regarding her behavior at your twelve week appointment.  If you don't like the way your doctor handles your concerns you may want to consider finding another practice.

 

I would definitely address the concerns with the doctor.  If you leave a message it's most likely the nurse will respond to you, but I would definitely speak to the doctor at the next appointment or contact the office manager and ask her who you need to contact to make a complaint with someone in the nursing department.  The nurse may have a manager or the doctor may be her superior.  Either way the doctor should address your concerns and make you feel at ease with all of this.  They are providing a service to you and you should be happy with it.  

Pockety

I would definitely tell the doctor if I were you.  The doctor may not know how the nurse is behaving, and can't do anything about it if he doesn't know.

I'd actually print out your thread here, and take it with you when you see the doctor, as sometimes we have a tendency to back down and not really tell the whole ugly truth, and in this case, the nurse's behavior is completely unacceptable.

Depending on how the doctor reacts (upset at the nurse, or nonchalant), you'll know if you need to find a new practice or if the doctor intends to fix the current problems.   

gymnst1013

She sounds like a real biitch.  I would definitely talk directly to your doc about her.

susieandmarty

i would ask to speak directly to the doctor or ask to speak with the doctor privately at your next visit.I would address your concerns with the doctor and express that you dont believe that the nurse is compassionate or appropriate

CarlaAndJames

I agree. Talk to your dr, and if you don't get the answer you want, there are lots of practices out there.

Where in Tx are you? If you're in DFW and need a new dr, I can recommend mine or I'm sure there are several others here and the DFW board who can as well.

ccorso

I would tell the doctor everything!!!!

S&D_2005

I would tell your doctor, and if that doesn't do anything, then I would probably find a new practice. I'm sure you can find a better OB practice with more caring and professional nurses and doctors. A first pregnancy is scary and exciting all at the same time. You don't need someone to make you feel stupid whenever you ask a question. Honestly, I wouldn't even bother talking to the doctor, I'd just find a new practice. Then I would let the doctor know why you are leaving.

nowayamyrae

Yikes. Your pregnancy is going to be a long and scary road as it is, I would switch practices. I would try to speak to the DR about it, and if you don't see any relief in the coming appointments, I'd switch practices. 

lovelyTX

Thanks all for your feedback! It's reassuring to know I'm not being a crazy or overbearing mom-to-be...I am seriously pretty rational and calm about everything, but of course don't want to take anything without calling them, which has been my main point of interaction with her. The only thing I've felt good about with her was when I called about some early on spotting, and she followed up with me quickly and reassuringly.

I am in Austin, and definitely love my doctor and the practice, which is an all-women's group. The nurse isn't usually involved much at my appointments, there is actually another nurse who does the blood pressure, weight, etc. each time so I'm hopeful I can talk to my Dr. privately about my concerns and see if there is another way I can go about getting in touch in the future.

Syncronicity09

I agree with every poster. Tell your concerns to your doctor.

When my sister went into labor the nurse at the hospital was a nightmare. We even over heard her telling another nurse that she knew better than the doctor and that no one knew what they were doing like she did (if she meant making mothers in labor miserable she was definitely correct.) I think she was more caught up in herself and not so much in how her actions were affecting those around her. It would be good for your doctor to know she makes patients uncomfortable, I am sure you are not the only one.