Time Off Work Before Birth/EDD - How to Decide?

GrayGhost13

Hey ladies,

I'm curious, for those of you who are taking time off before your baby arrives, how did you decide whether to stop working early and when?

I had always thought I'd want to work until the baby arrives, but now that I'm getting down to the last few weeks, part of me is wanting to change my mind. I'm exhausted every day, I'm starting to feel very uncomfortable after sitting at a desk for 9 or 10 hours straight, the longer I'm here, the more new assignments I keep getting put on my plate (haven't really been able to down-shift my responsibilities yet), and--my biggest issue--I'm so tired from work that I haven't been doing much to get ready at home (nursery is still unfinished, hospital back not packed yet, car seat not installed, lamaze video not watched yet). On the flip-side, the new employee who's going to cover for me has only been here a week, and I know my boss wants me to stay as long as possible and come back as soon as possible. I feel a lot of guilt pulling me in both directions (a taste of what motherhood will be like, I suppose).

Anyhow, I have enough PTO accrued that I could afford to take an extra week or two before my 12-week mat leave if I want. (Very lucky, I know!) I'm just trying to decide what feels like the "right" thing to do.

Any advice?

melissa4252008

My due date is 12/29 and I was going to be going out no matter what on the 23rd, because the college closes for break that day. But I decided to have my last day be the 17th. I also have enough PTO saved up to take the 20 - 23rd off without it affecting my ability to get paid my entire maternity leave, so I figured what the hell. The driving factor for my decision is that I don't want to commute to Boston the week before I am due.

[Deleted User]

Can you shorten your weeks?  Maybe work 3 days for a little bit then the last full week off before your DD? 

It will feel better to get things done at home, but too much time off & you might be bored.  It really depends on your personality.

lilmgirl

When I start time off was basically determined by another co-workers schedule.  She had requested to take this week of PTO and because it's fiscal month-end for my company, I knew I couldn't (or really shouldn't) be gone either.  So I have a week off from when I stop working until my EDD and I talked to my boss just taking that week (or however long) unpaid. 

As far as the comfort thing, fortunately I'm able to work from home.  I've turned into a real crab-ass lately and shouldn't be allowed to talk to anyone.  Plus, I really don't have any clothes that fit so when I do go into work, I've been wearing yoga pants and H's sweatshirts.  Not exactly professional.

jnicolen

i am not taking any time off before baby comes either (unless my doctor instructs me to do so).

for me it came down to money.  i wont be going back to work after baby comes, and my husband is finishing up school.  basically, i want to earn as much money as i can...up until i stop for good.

 if i were going back to work, id probably take some time off now.  same as you, i am very uncomfortable, and havent had time do prepare much for baby.

BabyS2008

I'm not. I'm working up until the day before my c/s. It's not worth it for me. I have to use my sick days and I'd rather use up and get paid AFTER the baby is born rather then before. What am I going to do at home?? Sit on the couch? We have everything ready for the baby already so I don't have to do that. My DS will be in school anyway because I don't want to ruin his routine...so I'd just sit there and watch TV and eat. Not worth it to me when I can take the extra week AFTER she's here to spend with her.

However, my days are not as long as everyone elses because I'm a teacher and get out at 3:30. If I had a regular office job, it may be different, I don't know.

Angeldcf

I've been blessed with an easy pg.  I worked up until 38 weeks, but my job was retail cashier so I was on my feet the whole time.

Honestly, I was hurting last week.  This week, I'm having more cramps, & it actually hurts (not just discomfort) when LO rolls.  I'm very glad to have staretd leave this week though I could still be working a desk job.

curlydoglover

I think if you can afford to do it, do it.  At the very least, start talking to people about your workload.  It's not smart of them to keep giving you new projects when they KNOW you're going to be gone for 3 months and you could conceivably go into labor at any point now.

I know how you feel though. We're ramping up this major (like, six-figure, coming out of capital budget) project that I'm co-lead on and I'm at the point with work where I really wish I could just say "Know what? This is my last day/week." and be done with it with a clean, set break rather than living with this "I have no idea when I'll be gone so I have to treat every day like it's my last day."  But I only have enough vacation to pay for 8 weeks of leave and I'd rather save it for when he's here....

rsmith1175

I had wanted to work until the first week in December but things haven't turned out that way.  I am going in for a scheduled induction on the 20th of Dec.  Over the last two weeks that I worked I noticed how much I was feeling like I just wanted to be done.  I bartend/waitress and was really feeling miserable being on my feet.  I know the shifts weren't that long but it was tough being polite and nice when what I really wanted to say was "Your all cut off!!!  I don't care if you want another drink, get it yourself." 

I am done working!!!  I made it to a month before the induction date and I am happy I don't have to go to work.  I don't have leave time or any income right now but I don't care.  I don't think I would have made it much longer without snapping at a customer or co-worker.  It's nice to go to bed at a normal time and be able to be here at night with the kids and hubby. 

I just listened to my body!!!

GrayGhost13

Thanks, ladies! You've given me lots of good food for thought.

I think the idea of a "clean break" is kind of appealing to me. With the uncertainty of not knowing if I'll be here three more weeks or three more days, it's hard to get anything turned over to anyone else. Plus the 10-hour days are kicking my butt. I think some of my cws are in denial that I'm actually going to be gone for three months. LOL

Hmm... well, I have the long weekend to think about it and decide what's next. Thanks again!

reddroses

BabyS2008:

I'm not. I'm working up until the day before my c/s. It's not worth it for me. I have to use my sick days and I'd rather use up and get paid AFTER the baby is born rather then before. What am I going to do at home?? Sit on the couch? We have everything ready for the baby already so I don't have to do that. My DS will be in school anyway because I don't want to ruin his routine...so I'd just sit there and watch TV and eat. Not worth it to me when I can take the extra week AFTER she's here to spend with her.

However, my days are not as long as everyone elses because I'm a teacher and get out at 3:30. If I had a regular office job, it may be different, I don't know.

reddroses

BabyS2008:

I'm not. I'm working up until the day before my c/s. It's not worth it for me. I have to use my sick days and I'd rather use up and get paid AFTER the baby is born rather then before. What am I going to do at home?? Sit on the couch? We have everything ready for the baby already so I don't have to do that. My DS will be in school anyway because I don't want to ruin his routine...so I'd just sit there and watch TV and eat. Not worth it to me when I can take the extra week AFTER she's here to spend with her.

However, my days are not as long as everyone elses because I'm a teacher and get out at 3:30. If I had a regular office job, it may be different, I don't know.

reddroses

BabyS2008:

I'm not. I'm working up until the day before my c/s. It's not worth it for me. I have to use my sick days and I'd rather use up and get paid AFTER the baby is born rather then before. What am I going to do at home?? Sit on the couch? We have everything ready for the baby already so I don't have to do that. My DS will be in school anyway because I don't want to ruin his routine...so I'd just sit there and watch TV and eat. Not worth it to me when I can take the extra week AFTER she's here to spend with her.

However, my days are not as long as everyone elses because I'm a teacher and get out at 3:30. If I had a regular office job, it may be different, I don't know.

This. I plan to work up until Christmas break (unless he decides to come sooner) since I'd rather be active at work, then at home not doing much. I also leave work around 3:20p and at 2:30pm on Mon. & Fri., so my workday isnt that long.

slwprincess

I've pretty much decided to stop going in to the office.  Haven't gone since last Thursday and I was really only doing half days all week last week too.  I'm lucky that I can telework but even that is wearing me out right now.  I managed to work up until the day before DS was born and was sure I could do it again this time but there is really no way.  I am very sore and uncomfortable and moving so slow.  Plus I am really biotchy and I figured I should probably spare my coworkers from my wrath.  But what really made up my mind was the fact that my OB thought I would have this baby this week if I kept up my normal routine.  I really want her to stay in through Thanksgiving so that kind of made my mind up for me.  I knew I needed to stay home and take it easy.

LovesMM

The school schedule pretty much determined when my last working day would be. I'm a substitute teacher and the kids are on Thanksgiving Break for the week. Next week is my due date. Lots of teachers won't be taking off next week because they really don't have a lot of time to get grades in before the end of the nine weeks and in three weeks they have Christmas Break. It was just easier to leave at the break.

Kohler2009

I'm due on the 14th (a Tuesday) so I decided my last day will be the 10th (a Friday).  Unless, of course, the baby decides to come earlier.  My STD has a 5 day waiting period, so I'll be using PTO from the 13-17 and then have STD kick in.