I think the reality has really hit me. I can't stop crying.
Gma tried putting some rules with DH regarding DD and thankfully, DH did the right thing. She wanted to make sure that DD has her quiet time and to make sure I have the foods she like (which is almost none.) DH assured her that we would have the foods, but DD is DD and we can't make her be quiet all the time. We did decide that after 2 weeks, we are going to have DH's uncles come back to town and they will be the ones to place her in a home, but we will do the research.
It's only 2 weeks, it's only 2 weeks...
Re: DH's gma comes tomorrow and I am a mess
Gma tried putting some rules...
Woaaaahhhhh. Here's hoping the two weeks go by quickly.
Charlotte Ella 07.16.10
Emmeline Grace 03.27.13
I just don't comprehend this whole situation. How is this your responsibility?? Netither my parents nor my husbands would ever even consider putting us in this position. SHe has children, and they should be the ones to take this on. I don't them, and I don't want to be out of line...but they sound very, very selfish.
My money is on them all making sure that if something happens to her, they get everything and you and dh are SOL even after everything you've done. I am pissed off for you.
They live out of state. We are researching the places for her to go, but they are going to be the ones to put her in there. DH loves her and I love him, so I can do 2 weeks. I might be bitching on here a lot over the next 2 weeks.
time to drug her tea.
I'm kidding. mostly.
Two weeks is nothing...you can do that! But be careful, I have seen two weeks stretch out to be months. Of course your dh loves her, but it is still alot to ask of both of you.
My uncle lives out of state and left my mom to take care of my grandmother for many years. It was very, very hard on her. Mostly because as much as we loved her, she was not a very pleasant person to be around.
I agree with the others...almost anything is manageable for 2 weeks. you just need to do everything in your power to make sure it is ONLY 2 weeks!
I feel so badly for you. I am in a similar but much smaller scale position with the burden of certain family members falling on us b/c we are the only ones close. It's hard not to feel guilty (b/c really...helping family is a NICE thing to do...) but helping others shouldn't mean losing your happiness in the process. I really feel for you.
IT'S ONLY TWO WEEKS, IT'S ONLY 2 WEEKS.
You are in such a sensitive situation. I am praying for you that it's only two weeks, and that the time flies as quickly as possible.
Do you have to provide care for her while your DH is out (meaning that the burden of care is mostly on you - meals, meds, etc.)? Or is the health aide going to take care of most of that?
I feel for you. You CAN make it through two weeks. Vent away as much as you need to, and make sure that your DD knows that this situation is temporary too.
(((hugs)))
I'll do meals and make sure she eats. She can move around and get dressed on her own, but we will have a health aide come to do sponge baths and take her to any appts. that I can't do. They will also come and do therapy with her.
I really feel for you. My mom is stuck in a mess like this. My step-dad's mom is 86, she's a bit schizo and now has alzheimers. He also has a 56 year old sister with Cerebral Palsy that the mom has been caring for alone since the dad died 5 years ago.
Now, the mom is starting to forget so much and she's always sleeping, or feeding herself and the sister spoiled food, or hiding stuff because "people come at night and take things"....soooo my mom has had to start going over there a almost daily to make food and clean up and even bathe the sister. My poor mom is so depressed when she has to go there, its so hard on her and I feel so bad.
My stepdad's mom refuses to get an aid because she says they steal her stuff. Its awful getting to that point
((hugs))
If I was in the area, I would run over a two week supply of booze right now!
More importantly, can she use the bathroom by herself? That would definitely push the situation into the unbearable category for me, if not!
If her neighbor is trying so hard to get in her will, it sounds like she has sufficient assets to afford assisted living or a nursing home, though I know those do eat up a lot of cash. The cynic in me wonder if her kids are using you to try to avoid that expense and preserve their inheritance? Anyway, I just hope you're not being taken advantage of. Stand very firm on the two week timeline, and good luck surviving it!