I have a Q and I need an A

EdithBouvierBeale

Since when is the term MARRIAGE religious?

I got my MARRIAGE license from the state of Nevada courthouse.

I didn't get anything cleared by a church.

it is a license to marry- not a license to unite civilly unless sanctioned by a church at which point said union may be referred to officially as a marriage.

Im curious why the religious people think they have anything to do with the term?

 

EdithBouvierBeale

really? NOBODY can explain to me what hand religion has in the term marriage?

not graceantheo, not praline? you two know everything- you're the ones saying we need to let the religious zealots have that term to snuggle and cuddle and love for their very own, and refer henceforth to our unions as simply civil (fine by me- I want NO affiliation to be made between myself and a church.)

But, I do see a problem in placating the zealots who think they deserve a say in legislation because of what ideals their faith of choice subscribes to.

it's NO DIFFERENT than the water fountains for black people. it's shameful! Would it be ok to call a black/ white marriage something other than a marriage?

no.

not ok.

 

 

expectingnothing

Beats me.  I'm not religious and I was/am married.  He was more religious than me and cheated, so there goes that!

EdithBouvierBeale

Im sorry to hear that! I am sure the gays had something to do with it. (just kidding. I figured you might enjoy it if I made jokes about something that happened to you that was horrible.)

omg. I am inappropriate.

but seriously? I am sorry he did that to you and your family. I hope you're happy and moving on to a new and deservedly good life. You will find someone who will give you the respect you deserve- I promise!

expectingnothing

Thanks!  (I was expecting0207, but I'm not pregnant and I no longer look ahead and 'expect' anything in life!)

 We are good - we are moving forward in a positive direction surrounded by the love of my family and an incredibly awesome group of friends.  Oh, and the c/s and alimony for life (regardless of if I remarry) helps too!  Doesn't sting as much that I helped put him through med school and residency since I'll have a piece of the pie every year until he turns 65

Kapalua

that's what I was saying!  why is everyone so hung up on what we call it?  wtf cares. 

EdithBouvierBeale

expectingnothing:

Thanks!  (I was expecting0207, but I'm not pregnant and I no longer look ahead and 'expect' anything in life!)

 We are good - we are moving forward in a positive direction surrounded by the love of my family and an incredibly awesome group of friends.  Oh, and the c/s and alimony for life (regardless of if I remarry) helps too!  Doesn't sting as much that I helped put him through med school and residency since I'll have a piece of the pie every year until he turns 65

DUDE- I am THRILLED to hear that!! I feel like it's pretty good compensation for what he did, no? I mean, you get to keep the money, but lose the disrespectful jerk! even if you remarry?! BONUS!

I remember you as expecting 0207, actually.

I was brideofranken. but It was time for a change.

expectingnothing

Oh definitely!  My friends who have been through this told me 'strike while the iron is hot' when he is feeling super guilty.  He signed the agreement 13 days after he admitted everything, and less than 5 months AFTER we sold our house and moved 500 miles for his job.  So I am sad to lose my family and I grieve the loss of having a husband, at least my girls and I are financially secure... and the better he does financially as a trauma surgeon, the better off the girls and I will be  

AND if he ends up with OW, I will always be getting anywhere from 20-35% of his income until he retires.  So they will never financially achieve all that he could have had... and that is a legal contract, not a court order, so a judge cannot change it   All my ducks are nicely in a row. 

EdithBouvierBeale

I want to drink to this.

you have a great attitude.  ( I think I would too, in that situation, once I got used to the idea!)

hooray for you~

Jermysgirl

That was my point below...if marriage is a religious thing, why let athiests like me and agnostics like DH get married?  For that matter, which religion gets the use of "marriage"?  Because we all know that all religions except yours are wrong, so why should those heathen Hindus be allowed to use the term? 

Come the fvck on, people.  Marriage is not religious just because your bible says so.  If you want something different because you love whatever lord you love, YOU pick something different and leave the rest of us out of it.  Call it Flubdergen and we'll all stand back and let you have it.

EdithBouvierBeale

Hi Jerm!!

maybe they'd feel good if they got to refer to THEIR marriages as SUPER marriages.

or SUPER UNIONS!

we and the gays can have unions, but god only recognizes super unions!

 

Jermysgirl

EdithBouvierBeale:

Hi Jerm!!

maybe they'd feel good if they got to refer to THEIR marriages as SUPER marriages.

or SUPER UNIONS!

we and the gays can have unions, but god only recognizes super unions!

Hi Edie dahlink!

I would completely go for that.  If only we ruled the world...

gracendantho26

Sorry I was out at a delicious Indian Restaurant stuffing my face with basamati rice and paneer. It was goooood!

Anyway, before I left I did some google research because I was personally unclear about the origins of the word marriage. Given that Christians have latched onto it I assumed that it traced back to biblical times and had trasnformed over the years into what it is now. From what I found it is a covenant between a man and a woman and God. Well clearly that is not my view of it and I know that there are churches that will marry gay couples so you can be a Christian, married, gay couple. I guess it may not be recognized by all Christians but that might be the case even with my marriage considering I was not a virgin. Who knows! I am interested to go read others replies.

gracendantho26

gracendantho26:

Sorry I was out at a delicious indian restaurant stuffing my face with basamati rice and paneer. It was goooood!

Anyway, before I left I did some google research because I was personally unclear about the origins of the word marriage. Given that Christians have latched onto it I assumed that it traced back to biblical times and had trasnformed over the years into what it is now. From what I found it is a covenant between a man and a woman and God. Well clearly that is not my view of it and I know that there are churches that will marry gay couples so you can be a Christian, married, gay couple. I guess it may not be recognized by all Christians but that might be the case even with my marriage considering I was not a virgin. Who knows! I am interested to go read others replies. And FWIW I am happy to be considered in a union with DH versus a marriage. My relationship with God is not dependent on DH and I'm not sure the whole premise isn't entirely outdated.

 

ETA Something went kooky here...I meant to just add to what I had written and I accidently quoted and added.

femmegem

I have Ts and I need some A, Edith. Care to help me out?

gracendantho26

And just to be clear since it seems like people might be getting the wrong impression...I am PRO gay marriage. I thought I made that pretty darn clear but maybe not.

gracendantho26

You got a reply...where did you go?