***Clerk9***

babes12

Are you going to test today?  GL if you do!!!!

my dumb ass tested and of course BFN.  i just felt like i needed to test even though i knew it would be a BFN. 

Clerk9

I'm sorry for the BFN!    

If my temp is still up tomorrow, I'm going to buy a test & test on Saturday.  My LP is 12-14 days, so tomorrow is going to be the big day of reckoning for temps!

I go back & forth between thinking that if I act like a total FH & buy tests at the beginning of my cycle, it should give me a better chance of a BFP, right?    Then I get really upset about spending money on tests when I could just be a little patient & wait until AF is actually due.  So I'm taking the second approach this time around.    

This cycle has been really, REALLY hard for me.  It's my last chance for a BFP before our 1 year m/c anniversary, & my last chance to have a baby before I turn 34.  Every little temp dip has made me upset (like this morning--hoping it's not the start of the downward trajectory before AF).  But I'm trying hard to relax & just wait it out.  My new insurance kicks in in January, so the next few cycles will be au naturel no matter what, so I'm trying to relax & go with the flow.  Some days are easier than others.  And I'm worried I'm setting up for a meltdown if this cycle is a bust...

Wow.  You just asked a simple, innocuous question.  Sorry for the ramble...guess I've had a lot on my mind!  

I'm really hoping that your visit next week gives you the answers you need.  And thank you for asking about me.     

babes12

oh boy, i know it's so difficult waiting these 2wks.  ugh.  i'm really hoping your temp stays up for tomorrow!  i'm sorry this is going to be such a tough cycle for you.  i understand your concerns completely.  i don't know why TTC has to be so darn difficult. 

have you ever bought the IC tests?   then maybe you won't feel so bad testing since they are cheap. 

and don't worry about opening up that's what we're here for.    sometimes it's better to chat here than blab to the DH's.  lol  (((HUGS))) and Best of luck!!!!  i'll be looking for your chart tomorrow.

Clerk9

Babes, thank you SO much for "listening".    You've been a wonderful friend throughout all of this TTC baloney.  I really think that if it wasn't for this board, I'd feel like I was totally crazy & would've had that breakdown eons ago.

If this cycle doesn't work out, I just may invest in some ICs!    I'm also planning on doing the OTC CD3 FSH test (enough acronyms there?!?).   And I'm really going to have to get serious about getting a new job...have been dragging my feet because I'm SO scared that I'll stop ovulating again once I go back to work.  Bleh.  At least it's a plan.  

By the way, do you mind if I ask where you live in PA?  My family is in central/western NJ (where I was raised) & might be nearby!  

Thank you, again, for your support & concern.  It is very greatly appreciated & needed right now.     

babes12

it's so nice to have a place for women like us to go to in times like these.  I'm glad i can be there for you and listen whenever you need it.  And thanks for always being there for me too. 

i was definitely thinking of doing one of those tests too but i'm going to see what my ob suggests for testing next week. 

i think looking for a new job may be a nice/needed distraction from all this TTC stuff.  the month i decided to potty train my DS was the month i got my BFP.  it was really nice although not pleasant to have something else occupy my time and mind.  LOL

I live in Bucks County area it's in the suburbs of philadelphia.

Clerk9

Bucks County is BEAUTIFUL!!!  My family's in Mercer County (Princeton, Trenton area) right over the bridge.    I sure miss it up there this time of year...please enjoy the fall weather & foliage for me!!!  

babes12

oh ok, they are nearby then.  )  the foliage is definitely nice around here.

DH's mom and aunt and uncle live in Ocala, FL.  is that by you?  i'm not too familiar w/ FL. 

Clerk9

Not near too much where we are right now!  

We're on the panhandle, about an hour north of Panama City & not too terribly far from Alabama (hence DH's sexy southern drawl).  

babes12

ahhh. i see.