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My child will not eat---(not exaggeration) I'm worried...
I can't remember Monday...
Even the (new) daycare lady is stumped, worried, and frustrated.
Tuesday--> Breakfast - poptarts (don't judge)- ate
Whatever snack he had at preschool
Lunch- Mac and Cheese- refused to eat even one bite
Supper- Mac and cheese- refused, tried one bite, purposefully gagged self
Wednesday-->Breakfast- pop tarts
Lunch- Cheese burger, pasta with cheese, strawberry. Refused to eat until I went to daycare to have a "come to jesus" talk with him. Ate three bites. I left. Then he purposefully gagged himself.
Supper- Chicken strips, corn, grapes. Refused to even take a bite. He asked to go to bed, 45 minutes later he asked to come eat. Took a bit, and then he chose to go back to bed and fell alseep.
Today-- Breakfast poptarts (see a pattern??)
Snack-- graham crackers with frosting at preschool, and two mini chocolates for halloween party
lunch-- chili refused to eat.
Supper-- Pasta Noodles, grapes. Refused to eat, asked to go bed, asked to come eat ate to bites, gagged self, and then asked to go to bed.
Suggestions? he is becoming pickier and pickier and pickier. Last week he wouldn't even eat his go to's-grapes, string cheese, noodles, strawberries, etc.
He drinks milk with breakfast and at lunch, water the rest of the time. Juice for breakfast .
Don't flame the food choices. I almost always offer a vegetable, fruit, etc, but this has been a hell of a week.
I don't know what else to do. I don't know to punish, he asks to go to bed. He won't eat. He does wake up in the morning saying he is hungry.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: My child will not eat---(not exaggeration) I'm worried...
Could he have a sore throat? Or maybe he is having silent reflux (can they get it as preschoolers?) and he is associating eating with pain (or it actually hurts when he eats.
Sorry, that sounds so frustrating.
{Ava 5.16.06} {Ella 12.29.07} {Drew 2.9.10}
I think you are doing the right thing. He will eat when he is hungry. One of my ds eats like a bird and I practically have to withdraw ALL snacks so he will eat his supper. DS2 is my eater..will eat anything and everything.
I guess my questions are: How are his bowel movements/patterns? And is he maybe allergic to some foods? Have you had him tested?
I was going to ask about throat, stomach, poop issues, too. Anything along that line that make make it hard for him to eat right now? I can't remember how old he is--could he have a loose tooth? Or a cavity that's hurting him?
I wouldn't punish--food battles of will are some of the worst and it just makes the whole experience so much more unpleasant it makes him even less willing to eat than he already is.
I'm sorry! I know what it's like to have a picky eater. It's no fun!
My DD is going through the same thing. It is actually causing her to be pretty constipated. She has been refusing fruit and veggies and will only eat yogurt, PB&J, string cheese and pasta. She demands some sort of junk snack daily even though I don't even keep junk in the house.
I had to cut out dairy because the constipation was affecting her urinating. For the last 2 days we offer her fruit or veggies first. If she eats some, she gets some of her pasta or sandwich. Last night I snatched her pasta off her plate with my bare hand because she was trying to shove it all in her mouth.
Today went better. DH made her a salad while I was making dinner. She ate most of it waiting for me to finish and then we made her eat some green beans between bites of pasta.
For snacks she says she won't eat an apple. I cut it up for DS and she flips. I tell her that her brother is having an apple. She's welcome to have some, too. "If not, you can wait until dinner." She eats the apple.
Maybe the milk is filling him? I'm not sure how much milk they should get, but usually both of mine get about 10 ounces a day. The rest water.
ETA- although DD eats pasta, she has all of a sudden refused mac and cheese. She used to LOVE it. Not anymore. Just butter, red or white sauce now.
Well, his poop. Who knows. He is so irregular there because he holds it in because he doesn't want to poop his pants.
I thought about the tooth thing. I checked. Didn't see any thing that stood out. If this continues this week, I will be calling the dentist.
I hadn't thought about sore throat. Maybe I should call the doctor.
He would eat candy if I gave it to him. It is a battle of the wills right now. He *always* has at least one food that he would eat, and he won't even eat that. Because he is choosing to do it (he will eat candy) I don't know if I would give a negative correlation if I took away his trains.
Wouldn't that be alone the same lines of bribing him to eat (dessert)?
He probably only gets about 2 cups of milk a day. He is still drinking water.
I don't know what to do when he wakes up in the middle of the night. Do I give him a few crackers? Do I make him wait until breakfast?
Good idea. I will try that.
With most foods...such as Pop-tarts..they are healthier (somewhat) versions...When ds1 was having constipation issues, I gave him the Chocolate Fiber One Pop Tarts...and now the actual Poptart brand has some with added fiber!
The same thing with pasta (for the pp)...I buy the Ronzoni added fiber noodles. HTH!
Good idea. I will try that.
{Ava 5.16.06} {Ella 12.29.07} {Drew 2.9.10}
Pyloric Stenosis. Nope, once that is corrected, it can't happen again (supposedly). Kindof like an appendix.
We've had many weeks like that. DS will eat well for a week and then not eat much for a few weeks. No flames on what your DS is eating. Been there. I try to offer healthy snacks, but sometimes I feed him whatever for survival. Things that help during those non-eat weeks - yogurt, strawberries, toast, red pepper & hummus, tacos (the kid loves tacos). I try to stay away from cheese, just because he gets backed up easily and that makes his appetite worse - - but if that's all your DS will eat, well, just throw a little Miralax in with his drink. We have a frozen corn game too - hard to explain in type - but basically we throw frozen food at eachother.
DS has a Carnation Instant Breakfast every morning - doesn't look like much, but Pedi says it is good nutrition for a kid that doesn't eat.
We're doing a sticker/rewards chart right now. All I ask him to do is eat 1 bite of each thing and 3 bites of his favorite thing on his plate. I realize it's not much volume, but it's more than what he was eating a month ago. If he's still hungry after that, I'll cook up chicken nugget dinosaurs.
The kid loves breakfast, so I think I may start making scrambled eggs and pancakes for dinner. Our goal is to get him to 10%ile at his 4 yr well visit.
I try real hard not to get frustrated. I think we've tried everything at this point, so all I can say is our DS's will eat eventually. I think we'll be looking back at this time when they are teenagers, ravaging our fridges, and laughing at how stressed out we were.
David "BD" 2/8/07 Spencer 9/12/11Yes, but he won't even eat the noodles.
So if nothing is physically wrong, how would you treat it? I am really frustrated beyond words.
I know he's 3 and not 13, but do you think he could be not eating for emotional reasons? Just with the change in living and day care etc? Could he be just trying to control what he eats? (I'm not even sure if 3 year olds could react like this like teens can kwim? I'm just trying to help out with maybe why he is not eating.) Or he is 3 and just going through a phase! (Hopefully a short phase.)
And if he goes for a long time with out eating who cares if he is eating just pop tarts and string cheese. As long as you are offering him other choices at least he is eating something! Hang in there!
New daycare would only be the big change in the past 5 months.
We WILL be moving soon, but we haven't even started packing.
If nothing is physically wrong then treat it like a behavior issue which it is. No child will ever willingly starve to death. STOP making it an issue. Offer him foods you know he likes and he has to sit at the table with you and the battle stops there. DD has gone several days with only strawberries in her tummy. He will be fine, you are in a power struggle and no one will win. Back off offer good healthy foods and let it go.
Sorry I just re-read this and it sounds snarky, not my intention. I am a behavior therapist by trade and deal with thiis with my own kids.
DD2 recently had strep so it couldn't hurt to rule that out. She really didn't have any symptoms (until she got a persistent fever) except that she started to not eat--and wouldn't even take her chewable tylenol, which was REALLY out of the ordinary.
And if it isn't that, definitely ask the doctor for suggestions. They should be able to tell you how to deal with it, how long you can go on like this and when they think it might become a problem.
no flames on the what he's eating. when they are not eating much, i'm thrilled when they eat something. (been there)
and now i'm going to sound like a dang granny when i say is he regular honey? because mine also go on eating strikes when they are having trouble w/constipation. once we got through that (it was a whole potty training phase) the waning appetite stopped. not sure if it is at all a factor, but was in my exp.
gheez i just ased if your kid poos regularly.
Don't punish the poor guy! My son was and still is a very, very picky eater. I feel like he was ok until 3ish and then he stopped eating a lot of foods he ate previously. He really only had a handful of things he liked. Luckily, they included milk and fruit (and poptarts!).
I agree with the advice to not make a huge issue out of it. If it becomes a battle of wills, he will win. Offer things that are healthy or that you think he'll like and if he refuses, no big deal, just go on about your business. I think he's probably feeling pressure so he's trying to control the situation. If you ignore it, he might relax and begin to eat a bit more. Good luck!
give him some nice Carnation Instant Breakfast!! (not ideal, but I use it when I fear that my weirdoes are lacking nutrients from a food strike...)
many flavors! kids love it!
give it to him 3 times a day if you have to...
Really? You could not let it go? Of course I have heard of anorexia in fact I am more familar with it than most probably. It was obvious what i meant.
Claification-- right now I am NOT punishing him and NOT making it a big deal.
Just need some ideas to help me think outside of my frustration. He is the one asking to go to bed (I don't give him that option, but if he asks, I am not going to say no).
We are taking him to ToT at my work later and one of the nurses is going to look at his ears and throat. I'm also going to schedule a denist appointment for him.
I am offering him healthy foods. I was just giving this weeks worth of menu. He usually eats lots of fruits and yogurt. He won't even eat those right now. I'm stumped. And frustrated, and so broke that it is hard for me to continue to buy new foods for him to try to eat when he won't even eat his regulars which I have plenty of. (No, I don't receive food stamps, and yes I have internet
)
I really am offering him healthy foods. And, I am not punishing him, or yelling, or anything about this. I do encourage him to eat one more bite, but what parent doesn't?
I noticed that you said he holds in his poop. My daughter does this on a regular basis (she has encopresis) and there are days that she is so backed up that she has no appetite at all. Just keep in mind- doesn't sound like thats the cause for the whole eating thing, but can definitely affect you wanting to eat etc... as it makes her feel full, have stomach aches etc...
Good luck!
PS- I was just rereading and it sounds like some control issues too (like you said he would eat candy). My dd's withholding of her poop is a control issue (subconscious) that started our of fear after a painful BM and since working with her therapist (for the encopresis) we have seen other little control issues here and there- amazing how their little minds work!! And seeing how he holds his poop (to control not messing his pants) and then the food- I'd say there are def some control issues. Sometimes the control issues become so routine for them that they are not even aware that they are doing it.
If you have any ?s, you can find me on SP board