At what age

melmax

would you feel comfortable leaving your DC at a well known friends home for an hour or two?  I just started doing this with Ava once she turned 4.  I know the parent/s very well, I trust them, she is friends and goes to school with them, and it's for a max of 2 hours. She loves it and has a blast. I think it's great for her to have time with her frends without her mom and baby sister around. I believe it encourages independence and allows them to work out problems like sharing, etc (if any arise) on their own.

I ask, b/c a good friend of mine told me a few days ago that she wanted to be totally honest and stop beating around the bush. Several times I've asked her to drop her DD off at our house (for an hour) when Ava would ask for her friend to come over. She said that her and her DH don't allow her to be dropped off alone yet. I was just a little caught off guard b/c we spend a lot of time together (mainly the girls and the kids) and have known each other (and families) for over 15 years. 

What age did you/will you start doing drop off's like this?

joy143dh

DS goes over his friends house a lot.  They play in the yard or playroom while the parents listen in or watch at times.  He has friends over often too.   We've been doing going to and having friends over since he was 2ish.  Before that, he would go over our neighbors house for a few hours and play with their little girl (3) supervised by the mom and vice versa.

ETA: Wait... do you mean without any parents being home?

melmax

joy143dh:

DS goes over his friends house a lot.  They play in the yard or playroom while the parents listen in or watch at times.  He has friends over often too.   We've been doing going to and having friends over since he was 2ish.  Before that, he would go over our neighbors house for a few hours and play with their little girl (3) supervised by the mom and vice versa.

ETA: Wait... do you mean without any parents being home?

lol. NO.  I mean, at what age would you drop off your DC to a well known friend's house with their mom home, and you leave.

ali-1411

I'm not sure what you mean...MY friend's house or my child's friends house?

With my friends...definitely before 4 years old!  DD went to daycare at 9 weeks old, kwim?  I've dropped her off with friends to babysit for me and she's only 2 years old.  DS was spending weekends with my sister when was only a baby.

DS started going to friends house to play - his friends, not mine - when he was in kindergarten.  That's when he started making his own friends and not just being friends with the kids of my friends (does that make any sense?)

Basically, yes I think your friend is being weird.

melmax

ali-1411:

I'm not sure what you mean...MY friend's house or my child's friends house?

With my friends...definitely before 4 years old!  DD went to daycare at 9 weeks old, kwim?  I've dropped her off with friends to babysit for me and she's only 2 years old.  DS was spending weekends with my sister when was only a baby.

DS started going to friends house to play - his friends, not mine - when he was in kindergarten.  That's when he started making his own friends and not just being friends with the kids of my friends (does that make any sense?)

Basically, yes I think your friend is being weird.

Yea, I guess my thought was that they were being a little too over-the-top protective. 

And to answer your question- in my situation, Ava's 2 best friends' mothers have become my friends b/c of all the activities we do together with all our kids. But I'm curious re: the age you drop your child off at THEIR friends home.

joy143dh

OK, phew. 

Neighbor's house - since he was 1 wk old. A girl has to get her nails done, ya know?   

Preschool friend's house - since he was PT (so 3).  As long as the mom is normal, and knows about his allergies and his poopy dance, I'm fine with dropping him off.

AggieCouple

Hm.  We have a couple of really good friends who have babysat for us since ML was a wee baby.  Does that count?  If they had kids our kids' ages now to play with, we'd drop them off all the time! I trust my friends the way I trust my sibs.

Ciarrai

Well, I can remember dropping DD#1 off at a friend's house when I had OB appt when I was PG with DD#2, so she was just over 1 year old.  We've been friends with them since DD#1 was 6 months old and they have a DS 2 weeks older than DD#1. I don't count those as "real playdates" since we've been friends so long and it's almost like family.  It's more like friends doing each other favors.  We have a few friends where we trade off taking each other's kids whenever one of us needs it.  There's three of us who are close like that around here and we've done it often since the kids were about a year or year and a half.

DD#1 had her first "real playdate" where she was dropped at a friend's house with parents who weren't close friends of ours this summer.  It was at her BFF from preschool's house.  The girls were in class together for two years and I knew the parents fairly well, though we weren't what I would call close friends.  They have a pool so that added some concerns to the whole day.  Still, she loved it.  Loved being the "baby of the house" (BFF has an 11 yo sister and 13 yo brother).  They adore their baby sister and DD#1.  DD#1 loved the time "by herself" and had a blast.  And yes, they even went swimming (with BFF's dad supervising, of course).  Since then, she's come over here for a few playdates and DD#1's been back over there.  They love it!  My only problem is DD#2 gets upset and misses DD#1 a ton.  They're so close in age and play so well together that when BFF is here, both girls play with her and the three of them have a blast.  DD#2 feels left out when DD#1 is gone, but I try to give her special time especially while DS is sleeping.

Littlejen22

I have only done it once when DD dislocated her shoulder and needed to go to the hospital so I dropped 3yo DS at my friend that I have known for over 20 years and he played with his friends but cried for about 10 minutes.  My DS is NOT into being anywhere alone so that plays a big part.  But if he would like it I would drop him off at my two closest friend's houses to play with their kids but not someone from preschool, I just do not know them well enough.

lsufan

How is that any different than asking someone to babysit for a couple of hours?  Or has that mom never left her child for any period of time?  That is way crazy, unless the kid has developmental issues like auntie suggested.

I dropped my 17 month old off at a friend's house the other day while I co-oped at preschool, and I've dropped both my 2 and 4 year olds off at a friend's house for a short playdate.  With my 2 year old, I actually left him with his friend's au pair.