Is this reasonable?

Brougham7-15-06

We are taking a trip to orlando next Sept and my mom is going as well.  We never formally invited her...she just kind of assumed she could go, but we have no issues with her going.  We are using my friend's time share and getting a pretty good deal in my opinion.  She is only asking us to pay $650 for 7 nights...2 bedrooms, kitchen, living room etc.  Is it unreasonable to ask my mom to pay for half of it?  We are driving down and she will be going with us, but I kind of felt like it was only fair that she pay half since she gets her own bedroom (the master bedroom) and the 4 of us in the other bedroom because it has 2 beds.

I feel kind of sh*tty asking considering the cost (even though I think as a whole a great deal), but I don't think it is fair that we pay to drive her there and the condo for a week.

Thoughts?

sprads

totally reasonable - at least 1/3. I mean, you could have LO in their own room and take advantage of the master if she weren't going.

 

sara401

I don't think 1/2 is reasonable.  She'll be there helping you, plus you were planning on paying it regardless of if she's going to be there or not.  I think she could contribute some, but I wouldn't expect or ask for half.

Lyons_in_2007

It depends.  How, if at all, will you benefit by her going? 

Brougham7-15-06

Lyons_in_2007:

It depends.  How, if at all, will you benefit by her going? 

I would say that we could possibly benefit by having extra hands at disney or that type of thing, but it isn't like we will be going out ourselves and leaving the kids back at the condo with her as a sitter.

RFKD82909

I would talk to her about splitting costs some way even if it isn't 50/50. Maybe she can pay for gas?

Lyons_in_2007

sara401:

I don't think 1/2 is reasonable.  She'll be there helping you, plus you were planning on paying it regardless of if she's going to be there or not.  I think she could contribute some, but I wouldn't expect or ask for half.

I agree with this, entirely.

mrs.george2be04

sara401:

I don't think 1/2 is reasonable.  She'll be there helping you, plus you were planning on paying it regardless of if she's going to be there or not.  I think she could contribute some, but I wouldn't expect or ask for half.

This.

Mrs.Babbsy

mrs.george2be04:

sara401:

I don't think 1/2 is reasonable.  She'll be there helping you, plus you were planning on paying it regardless of if she's going to be there or not.  I think she could contribute some, but I wouldn't expect or ask for half.

This.

double this..sorry

If it's anything like my mom going on vacation with us totally worth paying all of it. She helped a ton.

 

l.m.k.

Yes, totally reasonable.

stillwaiting12

I wouldn't ask for 1/2. When MIL was alive she went with us on a few vacations and we always split things 3 ways. Since you are getting such a good deal to begin with I would maybe say something to her about contributing whatever she can or something like that since you aren't spending anything extra for her to come along.

mrsgillian

I wouldn't feel comfortable asking my mom to split costs. Our family isn't a split down the middle costs - if I'm out shopping with my sis I might pick up the bill and vice versa. I just hate money stuff and we all just kind of take turns picking up the tab. My mom is more than generous with us though so I just would think it would hurt her feelings.

I guess it would depend on the type of relationship you ahve with your mom. I would be grateful to have an extra set of hands and probably be begging my mom to go LOL. 

l.m.k.

Ugh, I meant to quote Sara. I think maybe a third is better than half. 

warriormomerin

I'd ask her to pay 1/4 and ask her to sleep on the couch (unless she has some serious health issue or something). That way the kids could have their own room, which would be way worth the 3/4 cost IMO.

If you didn't technically invite her, than I don't think she should get her own room. Maybe I'm just being a beyotch though.

Meg41208

sara401:

I don't think 1/2 is reasonable.  She'll be there helping you, plus you were planning on paying it regardless of if she's going to be there or not.  I think she could contribute some, but I wouldn't expect or ask for half.

Ditto this.

Moesten

Guess I am in the minority here, I think half is reasonable particularly in light of the fact that mom will have the master to herself and that you will have your whole family of four in one bedroom. Sure you would have had to pay the entire amount yourselves had she not gone but you also would have had the entire place to yourselves. 

allobosc

I'd be uncomfortable asking her to pay.  My parents usually pitch in $$ for things when not asked anyways.

I don't get how she just "assumed" she'd be allowed to go.  That is what I'd be upset about.  I'm snarky when it comes to my vacay time though.

kel716

I don't think I'd ask for half.  You know your mom and what she will and won't do.  If it were my mom, she'd wind up paying for all of our food, babysitting, and buying (unnecessary) souvenirs.  And if she's anything like that, she'll pay way more than her fair share through that.  If she's not, then I might ask her for a small amount, but not much ($150?)

Have fun on your vacation!

curlypie1

Personally, first I would wait and see what she offered up before making any requests. If she never offers maybe tell her the room is on you and maybe she could buy a couple meals to help out. I'm only saying this because it sounds like you would have booked the same place regardless of who else was going.

KristenBtobe

If it were my parents, they wouldn't come along uninvited or without us planning the trip together to begin with so I don't really know how to come at this situation. I wouldn't ask her for money. We vacationed with my parents this summer and their help was invaluable. It was so great to have an extra pair of adults to help with the kids, I don't see us taking trips without grandparents for the next couple years. Plus the kids loved it and I know my parents did too.

I also don't understand why she's getting a room to herself, isn't there a pull out couch or something she could sleep on? The idea of a toddler, infant, and two adults sharing a room sounds awful to me, but that may be because Maggie is a light sleeper.

identicaltwins2be

KristenBtobe:

If it were my parents, they wouldn't come along uninvited or without us planning the trip together to begin with so I don't really know how to come at this situation. I wouldn't ask her for money. We vacationed with my parents this summer and their help was invaluable. It was so great to have an extra pair of adults to help with the kids, I don't see us taking trips without grandparents for the next couple years. Plus the kids loved it and I know my parents did too.

I also don't understand why she's getting a room to herself, isn't there a pull out couch or something she could sleep on? The idea of a toddler, infant, and two adults sharing a room sounds awful to me, but that may be because Maggie is a light sleeper.

Ditto Kristen