Moms with DS and DD

Littlejen22

Be honest, does gender come into play in your house with the kids toys?  My DS is still very into girls toys.  He likes his blocks and doctor kits but he also likes girl dress up shoes and dolls.  We got him twin baby dolls last year b/c DD was getting one and we knew he would want one too, he is not attached to it but he will baby it sometimes especially if DD is playing with hers although it does not matter if it is his or one of her million dolls.  When we were on vacation there was a playroom and he loved the kitchen (we already have one) and the dollhouse. 

We just went through the Toys R Us catalog and he was looking for ideas for his Christmas list and when he saw the dollhouses he said, "I wish I had one of those".  On the next page with all the baby dolls and accessories he asked me, "would Santa get me girl stuff or no?"  I told him that Mommy and Daddy do not separate toys into boy and girl toys and he can play with whatever makes him happy.

We have never worried about if something was girl or boy and most of DS' toys that he plays with are gender neutral or girlish (toys given as hand-me-downs to DD for when she is older have been claimed by him.)  But I know that he is getting to the age where kids notice and my friend's almost 5yo has already made comments, he is very aware b/c he has a sister.  Part of me worries that DS is going to get picked on for it soon but at the same time it is just who he is and what he likes.  Unless DS comes up with a big gift that he wants to ask Santa to get him then we will give the dollhouse as a joint gift. 

So my question is, would you buy a dollhouse as a joint gift or give it to your DD?  And we are talking the typical Kid Kraft-type dollhouse.  And be honest, I know that lots of people will say, "oh you should get them whatever they would play with" when they would never actually do it themselves. 

Mominator

Honestly, I don't think my kids know the difference between girl and boy toys. They play together really well and sometimes it's trucks and sometimes it's barbies and sometimes it is something gender neutral like Lincoln Logs. Honestly, I have no problem with DD playing with "boy" stuff or DS playing with "girl" stuff. It just so happens that right now all the dress up stuff I have is girly, and DS loves walking around in heels carrying a purse. I see nothing wrong with it and as long as I can keep from assigning a gender to their toys I will.

UGAbride

My boys like that kind of girly stuff...my DH is a little "eh" on it, so I just try to get around it so we can all be happy.  Like I got the boys a 3 story Kid Kraft firestation last year, it's basically a dollhouse for boys with all the furniture, firefighter people, etc.  And they love kitchens, so my mom is getting them the BBQ version instead.  My boys are fine with stuffed animals instead of actual baby dolls for now...but if we are having a girl with this one, I'll have no qualms going ahead and buying girly stuff I know they'd like and letting them play with it till she's old enough

jettagurl

DS assigns toys to specific genders.....like he'll say, "that's a girl toy - you should get that for Natalie."  I don't know where it came from, I don't believe it came from me....maybe daycare?  Maybe it did - as if if buy two of something  (like the Tag system) I get one color for DS and one for DD. 

That said, I never interfere with how they play.  More often than not, Natalie is roped into playing trains or Cars, but he'll still play kitchen and push a stroller around with a doll inside.  They like to play 'family' (and include the twins, lol)....sometimes they pretend to be the same-gender parent and sometimes they switch.  

Often they'll mix things....like Nat will play with her Barbies and Ben will have his Buzz/Toy Story stuff, and have them all interacting.  

I think you should just follow his lead.

 

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skippy2310

DS also claims that certain things are "girl toys" or things are "for boys." I'm not sure where he got it from either, but I've never said anything about it to him. He'll occasionally play with DD's dolls or stroller, but more often than not, he gets DD to play trucks, firemen, etc with him. I'm thinking DD will get a dollhouse either this year or next and I'm sure DS will play with it some and that's fine. If I knew he'd play with it now, I'd get it for her and let them both play with it.

 

Purrrfect433

  I feel like you. I don't like to put gender-specific labels on toys and I've always let my son play with whatever he likes, however he likes. That being said, he somehow turned out really macho and claims to HATE all things "Girl". He does play with his sister's toys but in such a comically different way. He definitely puts a male-spin on the toys! Like, last week, he played with this baby doll that laughs when you press it's tummy.  That poor baby. Laughin' Baby(as it's called) slept in a paint-pan and had to use a dried-out swiffer as a blanket. It got run over by his bike(to make him laugh!) many times. He was thrown into the air to see if hitting the ceiling would make him laugh. Yes he was playing with a baby doll. But in a very boyish way. I'd get the doll house as a joint gift and make sure you get plenty of boy dolls to go with it. Ben uses his Batman figures, dinosaurs, etc. when he plays with his sister's doll house.

skippy2310

Purrrfect433:

  I feel like you. I don't like to put gender-specific labels on toys and I've always let my son play with whatever he likes, however he likes. That being said, he somehow turned out really macho and claims to HATE all things "Girl". He does play with his sister's toys but in such a comically different way. He definitely puts a male-spin on the toys! Like, last week, he played with this baby doll that laughs when you press it's tummy.  That poor baby. Laughin' Baby(as it's called) slept in a paint-pan and had to use a dried-out swiffer as a blanket. It got run over by his bike(to make him laugh!) many times. He was thrown into the air to see if hitting the ceiling would make him laugh. Yes he was playing with a baby doll. But in a very boyish way. I'd get the doll house as a joint gift and make sure you get plenty of boy dolls to go with it. Ben uses his Batman figures, dinosaurs, etc. when he plays with his sister's doll house.

 Ben and Owen would get along fabulously . This sounds about how Owen plays with C's toys.

shopgirl78

My DS1 loved playing with girl stuff.  He still does to an extent but he is just now labeling things as boy and girl.  While he loves cars, trucks, etc, he dresses up in DDs princess clothes and will play with her dollhouse.  I think mostly because he just wants to play with someone and he is closest to his sister.  He adores her.   I think Jake will grow up completely different have a older brother as a role model.  

I bought the dollhouse specifically for DD but I think it would fly as a joint gift.

shouldbworkin

It's all fair game in our house.  DS loves doll houses, how could you not at that age?  It's all about pretend play, not really playing with dolls.  DS isn't as into dolls as DD is.  He likes legos and cars still.  But, they like a lot of the same things too.  If it was me, I would be buying DS toys that he'll grow into.  The lego craze will probably be taking over your house sooner rather than later.