AP Questions

Rindesai

Hello, hopping over from second tri with some questions as I make my registry. I want to do Attachment Parenting, and I just wanna ask what I need.

I want to baby wear, so I was wondering what sort of carrier/sling you guys found best, and how early you were putting LOs in them.

I have been pondering co-sleeping, so I was wondering what sort of things became helpful in that, especially since my bf and I move a lot at night?

I'm definitely going to BF so then I was wondering what y'all did for cereal supplement ( a lot of formula moms put cereal in bottles) and how you introduced babyfood, or if you did? Also, I'm in college, so how harmful would it be to introduce pumped milk in bottle once baby gets to 5 months or so? Daddy would be the feeder, so it would give him some bonding time right?

I'm just looking for advice on having the best parenting experience and the best upbringing for my LO. Thanks in Advance.

mandyclaire579

We only used the hotsling and Moby at first....I didn't know much about babywearing then

DS slept with us but I am dead still at night. I would suggest an Arms Reach Co-sleeper, but others probably have better suggestions.

We didn't introduce cereal until after 6 months and only to thicken purees. If you BF, baby's iron levels will be fine until then. And we introduced pumped milk at 3 weeks because I was in school two nights a week. He was fine with it and I loved that! DH LOVED being able to feed him. I would think you would want to start introducing the bottle around a month so that he is used to it. I have no experience with waiting, but my friend waited until she went to work at 6 weeks and baby would not take the bottle. Luckily, she was able to SAH. We did a bottle every other night. I would pump and put it in the freezer.

GL and congrats on your baby! You're not "doing" AP, you're just doing what seems natural to you. Good for you!

am369

we used a ring sling from Sleeping Baby Productions. Very affordable and great quality.  I still love it, I can't wear it for long periods but a quick trip in the pharmacy or grocery store is great!

Now we use the Beco for longer periods of time and after a very long struggle to transition to a stroller I've given up.  I usually end up pushing the stroller and carrying DS.  Once I used it about 5 times it got really easy.  I leave the top adjusted and then just put it over my head, buckle around the waist, slip DS in, tighten and go!

MrsBeckO

I used a Moby Wrap the first 4 months and loved it. I started putting DD in it the first week. From there, once she got too heavy to comfortably wear the Moby, we started using a Mei Tai carrier. We still use it all. the. time. and we both love it.

As far as sleeping goes, we started out with an Arm's Reach Mini Co-Sleeper attached to our bed, but didn't end up using it much because she was in our bed most of the time. We made the switch to exclusive bedsharing around 3 months (ditched the AR co-sleeper), then around 8 months we set her crib up as a side-car to our bed. I wish we would have done that from the beginning!! I loved it, and when DD stayed in it, we all slept very comfortably and DD could still get her cuddles/nurse when she needed to. If you want to co-sleep (ie, baby in room but not in your bed), I really suggest either the Arm's Reach sleeper or using a crib set up as a side-car.  I don't know that I'd be comfortable full on bed-sharing if you acknowledge that you and your BF are both active sleepers. 

For feeding, there is no reason to give your baby cereal in a bottle unless directed by your pedi for severe reflux.  We waited until 6 months to introduce any solid foods, and followed a modified BLW (Baby Led Weaning) approach. We offered DD (mostly) homemade babyfood purees to rule out allergies (she was at a higher risk), then once we knew a particular food was safe, we offered it to her in table-food form. By about 8 months she was eating 80% table foods and we just filled in with purees if we felt like she needed a little extra on any given day. By 10 months, we ditched purees/baby food all together and she was eating what we were eating.

We had to start pumping the first week because of her jaundice, so we introduced a bottle of expressed milk very very early on. Had she not been so jaundiced, I would have exclusively nursed her til at least a month old before trying to pump/offer any bottles. It is not harmful to introduce pumped milk in a bottle, you'll just want to be careful not to use fast flow nipples. The slower flow nipples make them work for it a little more, so they won't get lazy when you have them at the breast. Our DD luckily never had a problem going back and forth from bottle to breast but I know some babies do. We had good luck with Playtex VentAire Wide bottles with slow nipples.  

kwinters87

Oooh there are lots of options for carriers, my favorite are woven wraps and you can start them in wovens from day one if you wanted too.  The moby is also great for newborns.

I just used a pnp when we co-slept.

I can't help you with bf-ing because it didn't work out well for me, but I hope it works for you because I really miss it!

Ruby_Soho

I just wanna ask what I need.

You need very very little, mainly an open mind and the strength to not let people's negative comments get to you or make you feel  like you should go against what your instinct is telling you.

I want to baby wear, so I was wondering what sort of carrier/sling you guys found best, and how early you were putting LOs in them.

I've only used a Moby so far but I love it. It's a bit draining to put on for short trips so I'm researching others to see if I can choose a second wrap. I've been wearing DS in the Moby since we got home from hospital at 10 days, he was 5lbs 12ozs.

I have been pondering co-sleeping, so I was wondering what sort of things became helpful in that, especially since my bf and I move a lot at night?

I really really want to have DS in our bed but I find it absolutely impossible to sleep so we have a hammock set up right beside the bed instead. DS *loves* it and sleeps brilliantly. I can put him down wide awake and he'll get himself off to sleep. https://www.naturessway.co.nz/Baby+Hammocks.html

 

I'm definitely going to BF so then I was wondering what y'all did for cereal supplement ( a lot of formula moms put cereal in bottles) and how you introduced babyfood, or if you did? Also, I'm in college, so how harmful would it be to introduce pumped milk in bottle once baby gets to 5 months or so? Daddy would be the feeder, so it would give him some bonding time right?

We don't supplement at all and don't plan to. Breastmilk on its own is fine for now. We'll introduce food Baby Led Weaning styles whenever he is ready, around 6 months or after.

DS has been having pumped milk since day 3. He was in NICU and tube fed for his first 8 days or so. Nothing wrong with pumping at all. I BF now but we have pumped milk left over from hospital so Dad does a feed every so often which is really nice for him. 

I'm just looking for advice on having the best parenting experience and the best upbringing for my LO. Thanks in Advance.

Just trust your gut and you'll be fine :-) FWIW I really like the Dr. Sears baby book. Good luck :-)

KateLouise

Firstly I want to say I don't think there is a "right" way to parent. I think as long as you are making informed choices, that your LO is loved and that you are making decisions that work for your family unit then you'll do just fine.

So I'll tell you what has worked for us and my thoughts and opinions, but they are just opinions.

Babywearing: I love my pouch sling for quick trips into shops when I wat to be hands free, but not mess around with a wrap or a pram. Lots of people here prefer a ring sling which you can adjust to suit yourself, but I've never tried one. A pouch sling, you need to get just the right fit for you.

I love my woven wrap for longer periods of wearing. It takes a bit of effort to learn, but now I find it super easy.

Ii haven't tried any other kinds of carriers.

Co-sleeping: we don't so this full-time just when LOs needed it.eg. LO being grizzly etc. and then we've bedshared. I find having LO in the bed makes me sleep very still., I am very aware of her.

We don't use anything special, but follow all the guidelines around bedding etc. 

I like that she sleeps well in her cot by herself and with us because I like having flexibility. I like her being able to nap by herself during the day. I like us being able to have a few drinks and not worry about LO being in the bed with us.

So I like the flexibility to bed-share when it suits us, but I don't have a philosophy around whether or not a baby "should" bed share/co-sleep or not. 

BF: I have EBF this whole time. When it came for solids (6mths) we did baby food, and now we're moving into finger foods.

I never used any kind of cereal supplement or formula and my LO slept just fine. Started STTN at around 12 weeks.  

I don't think there's any harm in having DH give a bottle, especially as it will provide you the opportunity to go to school, but apparently LOs need to have a bottle introduced around 6 -8 weeks so that they learn how to drink from it.

Just a head's up BF can hurt like hell when you're learning. It is SOOO worth pushing through the first couple of weeks but I can not recommend nipple cream enough to you. My Mum and sister also said to sunbathe topless whilst pregnant. I ignored them. I regret that.

Also mix a tablespoon of vinegar in 1/2 cup of boiled water. Keep it in the fridge. After feeding pour some in an egg cup/shot glass and dip your nipples in. Let nipples air dry. The cold and the healing vinegar are fabulous. Follow up with nipple cream.

good luck with the rest of your pregnancy, wishing you a wonderful birth. 

brideofaussie

For co-sleeping I loved our Arm's Reach Co-Sleeper.

I used no cereal supplements.  I introduced baby food at 5 mos (DS was more than ready) and started finger food at 6 mos. mixed with baby food.

Pumped milk in a bottle at any time is great.  The milk is the important part, the vehicle of delivery isn't as much.

As KL said, there is no one best way to parent except to do what is best by your child.  And no two children are exactly the same, so parenting (ideally) is slightly different for each kid.

One thing that raised alarm bells to me was this statement: I'm definitely going to BF.  No you're not.  You definitely intend to BF, but there is a possibility that it may not work out the way you thought it would.  And I'm not saying this to be a jerk.  I'm saying this b/c I thought the exact same thing; as if by sheer force of will I was going to BF.  And I did BF but it was difficult at first, and I supplemented w/ formula before DS was a week old, then after I went back to work my supply plummeted even though I pumped my arse off (weeks even before going back to work) and by 6 mos. DS was essentially a FF baby supplemented w/ BF. 

I hope you are able to BF as you wish, but just be prepared that it might not work out the way you thought it would.  And that is okay.

Kelly-renee

I used the moby and beco when DD was 4 days old, they were very handy since she wasn't happy if she wasn't touching another person.

Co sleeping and bedsharing are different, I didn't realize that for quite a while.  COsleeping is just room sharing, while with bedsharing you have your LO in your bed with you.  If you've already bought a crib the you should look into sidecarring it.  This was the most helpful thing we did with our nigttime situation.  You will be amazed at how aware you both become of your LO.  DH used to roll over on top of me all the time, he still does occasionally, he has never even set his arm on DD though.

 More power to you with BF.  That was my thought exactly, and it worked out quite well for us.  My best advice to you is to just assume every time your baby is crying that they are hungry for those first few weeks.  Sometimes they will have a wet diaper or just want to snuggle, but when you pick them up to feed them you can check all that.  Once DH and I decided this about DD we had a much happier baby on our hands, and the constant nipple stimulation helped increase my supply.  Your nipples will probably be sore, but if you can meet with a GOOD lactation consultant they can help show you holding techniques to improve your LO's latch.  You shouldn't give your LO cereal in a bottle, once you get near that stage you can research it more and see why people are for/against it.  Until your baby is 1 their main source of nutrition is breastmilk/formula.

There is absolutely no harm in Daddy giving baby pumped milk, but your LO may decide that they don't like this idea, and turn their nose up at the bottle.  My DD is currently on a bottle strike and only drank 1 oz of milk while I was at school for 8 hrs yesterday.  We started giving her a bottle at 6 weeks with no nipple confusion, she would occasionally get choked by the faster flow and her lack of control with a bottle nipple though,

Sorry about this book, I just got going, and I'm putting off some school reading.  Feel free to PM me if you have any questions about school with a breastfed baby.

Oh, also find your local La leche league they will know the best lactation consultants, and are usually a good source of breastfeeding knowledge in general