Today I feel sad.

synchrosally

I've been seeing a psychologist monthly just to "keep an eye on things" since I have a history of depression and SAD.  Today I admitted that I was starting to wear out.  The weather is changing, my son is more difficult to get to nap/sleep, and I'm getting less help now that DS has a new job.  My psychologist insisted (as he has since I first started seeing him) that I need to have time to myself.  This has been very hard since I am a SAHM and EBF.  I'm exhausted.  DS STTN but for some reason I can't.  I need a break.  I got home from the appointment today, fed DS, played with him, but he wasn't happy, so we danced and swayed, but he was screaming and I couldn't do anything to make him happy.  He cried, and then I cried, and then he stopped crying, but I didn't.  He eventually fell asleep and I put him down.  I hope today was just an off day, but I'm afraid it's going to be a long winter.  Just wanted to write all this down and introduce myself because I have a feeling I'll be here a little more often.

mommajenb

I understand.  My daughter is a preemie and I cry when she screams for no reason.  A lot of the times I am not sure what she wants and that is so depressing to me.  My husband is always encouraging me to take time to myself, but I feel guilty if I do that because there are always a million things to get done around the house.

Aerochyck

That's the one thing that I was always grateful for with my kids, for some reason when I cried they stopped but thinking back that wasn't until they were 4 or 5 months old.

Cry if you need to cry but do try to take time for yourself, even if it is just to take a nice long shower or bath.  If you are anything like me I needed to get out of the house otherwise I would obsess so I started going grocery shopping.  Even with DH's shifts I would find that I could go out at 10 at night and have at least one hour (door to door) of peace while still getting something productive done (but I hate sitting still).

Hang in there.  My oldest is now 3 and while some days I think about what a little pain he is, I wouldn't trade him for the world when he wraps his arms around me, gives me a big kiss on the cheek and tells me what a great mom I am.  It makes all of those difficulties with him as a baby melt away and reminds me that DD will be there one day too.

Aerochyck

Hey I just noticed you are a fellow Canuck.  Where are you located?

synchrosally

Aerochyck:

Hey I just noticed you are a fellow Canuck.  Where are you located?

Near TO.  You? 

Aerochyck

Same.  I am in Mississauga

txbootsy

I felt sad today too and the weather is not helping at all.

Hang in there. We just have to take it day by day.