Awkward situation

rumpunch21

One of my co workers just asked how I was feeling. I thought she was being nice and asking how I was feeling after the m/c, so I gave my standard "hangin' in there" response. Apparently she is the only one in the office that had not heard about the miscarriage. She followed up with "Any morning sickness?" At which point I had to say, in front of about 5 other people "You didn't hear? I lost the baby...about 2 weeks ago...when I was out for a few days..."

Ugh. I don't know who felt worse..her or me. Then, because I don't want other people to feel uncomfortable, I had to make a lame joke "Yeah.. so the answer would be no! No morning sickness... anymore..." as I hurried back to my desk to try and compose myself.

asltrouble94

I had the same kind of encounter at work yesterday.  She came up and said "So I hear you're having a baby, how exciting', I just said not anymore and fought back tears.  Then I think she was trying to make me feel better by saying well you can always try again (it didn't help).  I actually had buffer people that went around and told my office before I got there so we wouldn't have those awkward encounters but 2 people never got the memo.  I think these also happen on days you think you're having a good day and then the rest of the day goes downhill from there.

danie330

That sucks!  But it really sounds like you handled it well. 

jertie

Oh that's terrible!  I'm so sorry you had to go through that.  It sounds like you handled it beautifully, but it's one of those things where you're back at work, dealing with everyday stuff - then whamo - you get blindsided.  It can make a day really turn sucky fast.

I had this happen to me a week ago.  The really bad news is that this particular guy at work is deaf and wears a hearing aid.  So when he was asking me how many months I had to go and I told him "the baby died" he  didn't hear me, so I had to say it again, except louder.  He turned positively grey and I started to cry (not sob - just tears falling).  It was awful.  I would just like to have a sign over my head sometimes saying "This woman's baby just died.  Please cut her some slack, be kind to her and pregnant woman or people with babies find somewhere else to be.  Thank you."

Laurakat81

That sucks. I'm sorry you had to go through that.

I went through something similar last week when I co worker pat my stomach and said "Oh you're barely showing!"

I started to just walk away but then she kept talking so I finally turned to her with tears and said "I lost the baby."

And just like you, I don't know who felt worse at that exact moment.

I wish people would just mind their own business anyways, I'd never even told anyone at work I was pregnant for that exact reason but they figured it out.

danamh83

I had the same situation with my supervisor.  Apparantly the msg from the HR director didn't make it down to her.

spincat9

Wow, you handled that so well - much better than I would have.