Community› The Bump Message Boards› School-Aged Children
School-Aged Children
New Discussion

XP: disciplining re: issues at school

taagenttaagent member
in School-Aged Children

SD got into trouble at school on Friday and it made me start to think about discipline in general.  Last year she would get into trouble (quite often) for talking during class and she would end up with silent lunch.  Unless she had silent lunch more than once in a week that would basically be the extent of her punishment at home.  She is now 10 and after having that conversation and warning her HUNDREDS of times over the last 3+ years that I can actually remember DH and I both feel that we need to have a punishment at home because obviously she isn't learning her lesson...mind you she does get a warning before the silent lunch.  So, I was curious as to what other's punishments would be in their households or if you wouldn't punish at all.

 Also, SD's issue this week had nothing to do talking in class.  The teacher was reading something to the kids as part of her lesson and SD thought it was uninteresting so she picked up the Harry Potter book on her desk (that she has read twice already) and began to read that instead of listening to the teacher.  I was floored she had the nerve to do this because she absolutely KNEW it was wrong but did it anyway.  She was punished by DH and we are hoping she learned her lesson.  I was just interested also in hearing what your punishment would have been for this...she received silent lunch for this behavior in school.

Report Reply to Post

Re: XP: disciplining re: issues at school

  • mickey1330mickey1330 member

    Our philosophy is that if you get punished at school, you get punished ay home.  Right now, we take away whatever his favorite thing is (right now, it's Wii).  Only for that night though.  However, if it were to progress, and he gets in trouble more than once, then we extend it from there by taking away more things.

    Luckily, he hasn't gotten in trouble at school this year, but right after the baby was born he had a rough patch (obvious jealousy) that caused him to not listen at school.  Poor kid didn't play his wii for months!

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
    Report Reply
  • Loading the player...
  • taagenttaagent member
    When she got into trouble on Friday (because of the seriousness of her infraction) DH took away all technological items for the weekend so she had no tv, no computer, no nintendo DS, WII, playstation, stereo, MP3/recorder.  By the end of the weekend she was SO bored. 
    Report Reply
  • DandelionMomDandelionMom

    I'd have her write an apology letter to the teacher.  That way she really has to think about what happened and how it can affect the class and how she can fix the problem.

    .
    Report Reply
  • madeleines_mommymadeleines_mommy member
    imagemickey1330:

    Our philosophy is that if you get punished at school, you get punished ay home.  Right now, we take away whatever his favorite thing is (right now, it's Wii).  Only for that night though.  However, if it were to progress, and he gets in trouble more than once, then we extend it from there by taking away more things.

    Luckily, he hasn't gotten in trouble at school this year, but right after the baby was born he had a rough patch (obvious jealousy) that caused him to not listen at school.  Poor kid didn't play his wii for months!

    This is us too.  I take away the things she likes to do at home and no playing with friends outside.

    Report Reply
  • taagenttaagent member

    I highly doubt she is ADHD.  We are definitely having defiance issues at home.  I have asked her not to do something and two seconds later she does it anyway.  Or I ask her to put her book away and get ready for bed and she argues with me, I finally tell her STOP and she gets up goes to her room and insead of getting ready for bed will open up her book again and continue to read thinking she wont get caught.  Or it is little, I ask her to stop reading so she can do something else she is supposed to do and she will continue to read anyway.  I usually let her get to a stopping place but then it is 3,4, 5 minutes later and she is still reading.

    ETA: I just assumed it was a pre-teen issue.  She has two older brothers and at her mother's house her mother's exboyfriend's daughter had some serious issues with defiance (possibly bipolar). I assumed this was either par for the age course or as a result of the influence of this other girl.

    How do we deal with defiance issues?

    Report Reply
  • Swoop1Swoop1 member

    Can I start by saying that not every behavior issue is ADHD.

     Is it possible that she is bored? Maybe her classwork and lessons are not challenging enough for her? I got into the most trouble for similar situations right before they moved me into the gifted program. And it's the same story you will hear from other gifted kids and parents of gifted kids too. You will hear about kids failing or falling below average in class until they are met with a challenge and then you see their grades sky rocket. 

    If it's a possibility could you work with her teacher to provide her with work that might keep her more interested? 

    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"