etiquette q re shower gifts

SanHawaii08

We have a baby registry on both amazon and babies r us.  The shower is in 2 weeks, and we've started having a lot of Amazon boxes show up!  Funny thing is, a lot of them are from people who live in our city, and are attending the shower.  So...do I open them now and send thank you notes right away?  I saw one of my friends last week, and she asked if we had gotten the gift (b/c i hadn't sent a thank you yet ) - so I feel like I should go ahead and open and send thank yous.  On the other hand, maybe I should leave all the boxes and open them during the shower - is that weird?

what's the right thing to do?  there are out of town folks coming to the shower, so I could understand them not wanting to lug a gift on the plane.  but the outside of the box doesn't say who it's from either, so some of the gifts could be from out-of-towners who aren't coming...

I stopped opening the boxes and thought I'd check with you ladies!

redshoegirl

I would keep opening them, because as you said, you don't know if the gifts are from people who are attending the shower or not.

As far as thank you notes go...hmm. Maybe when you get something from someone who is attending the shower you can dash off a quick email to say thank you, and then give them the "official" thank you notes ("Thank you again for the wonderful ABC! It will really come in handy when we XYZ.") during or after the shower?

inamra

Hm...I attended a shower where this happened and the girl kept all the boxes that were mailed to her unopened until the day of the shower. But for me, we only got one thing mailed to our apt before the shower and it was a crib mattress and since my shower wasn't at our apt, I wasn't gonna lug the mattress in the original box to the shower just to open it up for everyone to see =P So given that ppl don't necessarily have their shower at their own house, I don't really think there's really an etiquette to follow so you can either open it or not depending on what you'd like to do, but that's just my opinion...

MrsNJSwimmer

I'm pretty sure I opened mine as they came, although I didn't get any from people who were coming to the shower, unless they were bigger gifts that they didn't want us to have to lug home (my shower was 3 horus away) - like the carseat and stroller. 

I would just send a quick email if it's someone coming to the shower - "your gift came in the mail today - thank you so much! See you at the shower!" or something like that.

SanHawaii08

okay, I'm still tempted to open during the shower (especially since there seems to be precedence), but i feel bad not acknowledging the gift earlier. i think i'll follow your suggestions and open and send a quick note, with formal thank yous after the shower for ppl who are coming.  i don't like all the boxes sitting around - we have enough unpacked boxes from our move as it is!

the shower will be at our place, btw.  i was just surprised b/c i've gotten probably 6 or 7 gifts so far from ppl who live here, who will be coming!  and while one is a pnp, the others are books, sheets, etc - definitely not huge items!  i've always sent the gift to myself, opened it, and brought the wrapped gift to the shower. 

MrsNJSwimmer

SanHawaii08:

i've always sent the gift to myself, opened it, and brought the wrapped gift to the shower. 

I have too.  I was thinking though, if they bought from your registry, the default address is to you, so if they didn't change it, it will go to you.  Maybe they just didn't reailze it until after they made the transaction?

lola808

If the shower's at your place, it seems pretty easy to open them there. (But if they're not wrapped, do you literally take the PnP out of the box to show it, or do you just say "and thanks to so-and-so for this awesome gift"?) It seems like it'd be more for show, but maybe it's a nice way to publicly acknowledge everyone's generosity.

I only opened gifts that were physically given to me at the showers and sent thank yous to everyone later (in combination with the birth announcement). I did verbally thank friends whose gifts arrived beforehand, though.

myday1708

That's weird that your friend asked if you got the gift. I always thought you were supposed to wait and open everything at the shower... That's what I did!

eacerna

My shower is this Sunday. I have received a few gifts in the mail mostly from those who wouldn't be able to come. I sent them TY notes (paperlesspost.com) as I received them. For those that will come to the shower, I may do the same and then send a formal birth announcement/ty note in the mail later.