I really can't win with DH.

lindsay.lou

He always accuses me of being too negative about the ttcal process (latest example from last night. He asked me what I was eating and I replied, "pineapple core that probably won't help anything at all"). He accuses me of being mopey and miserable.

But then when I try to be more positive he tells me not to get my hopes up. (Latest example from last night, he got annoyed when I said that this cycles due date of May 5th would be perfect for me as a teacher). 

I think this is his way of saying STFU and he doesn't want to hear the positive or the negative. I feel so bad b/c he HATES talking about ttc. I know he really wants to just have fun and have lots of sex and be surprised with a BFP. That ship sailed a long time ago and he's obviously having a really hard time accepting it. 

Aubs13

I'm sorry....it can be so frustrating not being able to talk to the person next to you, I know.  My DH is the naive optimistic one, and sometimes it just hurts to listen to it.

Sending {{hugs}} your way...

AppleRidge

Hugs...I hope you guys can have a frank discussion about this. 

DoingItRight

{{{{{{BIG HUGS}}}}}}

serendipity

(((((((smooshy hugs)))))))

ColindaP

Barf. My H is the eternal optimist type - it's going to work because it just has to! I'm more the realist type - no, it does not have to, and all signs point to no, it won't. But at least he understands that woohoo sex, BFP, baby ship sailed away long ago.

KristysRedBarn

I'm sorry.  Just like we miss the naiveness of ttc, I think our Dh's do too.  At least mine does. 

lindsay.lou

BBHME:

Hugs...I hope you guys can have a frank discussion about this. 

 This, combined with your siggy pic, made me think of Frank from Always Sunny. And that made me laugh. So thank you. 

Olive44

I'm sorry, hon.  My DH is the exact. same. way.  We were arguing last night because I was trying to come up with a plan, and he said we just need to have sex for fun, blah, blah, blah.  But then every 2ww when I get excited thinking this is our month, he pretty much talks me down saying he doesn't think it's our month.  It's a no-win situation. 

EntropicEpona

Ugh. It can be so damn hard. With us, it's usually someone being positive and someone being negative...we're very seldom on the same page. And as brilliant of a guy he is, he has this weird disconnect about TTC. He just does...not...get...it...

Hopefully you and DH will manage to figure it out.

dondraandluis

Ugh, I know how frustrating that can be (((hugs)))

butterfly843

Sending hugs, it use to bug me how optimistic dh was. But after this last loss he has become as bitter as I am and now I sometimes miss that optimism because I suck at it.

maceymay1816

Wouldn't it be great if we could all just have sex and get a surprise BFP?  But then nothing is a surprise when you are as committed to the process of procreating as we all are.  My DH has watched his family and friends all get their surprise BFP's and until after the visit to the doc this week I think he was pretty optomistic.  After this visit and knowing we have another surgery to go through and may possibly be starting on the IVF journey, I think he's finally come to my understanding. 

My neighbor put it so wisely the other night as I was venting about the process, she explained to DH that woman have three things that truly make them feel like a woman...1.  their lucy  2.  their boobs and 3.  making babies.  We had a great talk about how this whole process has made me feel less of a woman and I think my DH finally is understanding why I am such a bitter evil ***.

 I wish you guys the best of luck and I think being open about your feelings with one another is incredibly important.