questions for MoMs with older child(ren)

amcam24

1. When were you able to leave the house with the kids by yourself?  I feel like I'll never get there.  My twins eat every two hours sometimes, so I'm afraid to go too far from home with my older DS and the babies by myself. 

2. Did your older LOs have a hard time adjusting?  I never imagined it would be this much of an adjustment for DS.  He is 3.5 so he was an only for a while.  He is used to much more attention than I can give him.  I didn't prepare myself well for this part.

 

3.  How in the hell do I find the time to shower?  LOL!

MrsAmyB

1. Do you have a good double stroller?  I get out at least once a week.  Sometimes to the park and often to play dates.  I try to not go alone, but meet friends somewhere so if more than 1 needs attention I have another set of hands.  My stroller is KEY to my sanity!

2. My DD is doing well.  She is the same age as your DS.  I plan playdates and art projects for her so she gets 'fun time'.  DH and DD have projects to keep her busy (garden, etc).

3.   NEVER!  I can only shower when DH is home to watch them all.  And even then, DD has to shower with me.  I absolutely love getting an alone shower, but they are few and far between.

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DS1 was 2y2mo when the twins were born - so still stroller bound - which made it easy to get out with all 3 by myself early on - i have the valcdo trimode twin + toddler seat.  At 3.5 I don't imagine your son will sit in a stroller for long (i know Griffin doesn't as much now)... do you have a hitch hiker board?

I have a big clip (one of those carabeaner mommy clips) on the side of the stroller that Griffin calls his "special handle" - he knows he needs to hold it when we are walking - unless i tell him he can let go... he's really good about it.

my boys were always on a 3 hour schedule- so i'd leave the house RIGHT after feeding them- and have a good hour that i could be out at the store, etc, before i might need to feed - but always took what i needed along in case they needed to eat, too.  Just try it- the more you do it the better you get- and it's not so scary.  I felt like wonder woman those first few times! Now it's my normal. We leave the house almost every day that i have them alone with me.

3.5 would probably be harder to deal with the transition compared to 2y2mo ... your DS remembers his "old life" better than mine did- so it will require a lot of attention on your part - and getting him involved.  Griffin was awesome at burping the babies and loved doing it. Now that the twins are older they can all play and it's a lot easier.

remember- the babies can be put down and will be fine - they can watch you play with DS1, etc.... make sure every minute they don't NEED you that you are giving your DS1 lots of attention.  I try to make the time the babies nap in the am a special time for DS1 and I to read together, etc.

I put the twins in their cribs and Griffin watches TV in my room while i shower... when the twins were infants they were often sleeping in their bouncy seats while i showered and griffin watching TV... now the twins watch TV in their room (we have the portable DVD player with baby einstein while i shower.

MamaCrystal

1.  At first I was only leaving the house by myself with all 4 to take our oldest to preschool.  I would make sure that the girls had full bellies before we left and we were only gone for 20-45 minutes depending on if I grabbed lunch afterward for the boys. 

When the girls were about 5 months old I started taking all 4 to the park with some other families from our church.  The toughest part about that is chasing after our adventurous toddler ; )  (In that respect, it's a good thing that your DS is already 3.5 and is a little more independent.)

2. The biggest problem our guys have had in adjusting is having to be patient when they need things and I can't get them immediately.  It would help if you have easily accessible drinks, snacks, activities, etc. so that your DS can help himself to those things when needed.

3.  I remember the day that I finally got all 4 kids down for nap at the same time and could actually shower!  I only do that once in a while... usually I shower at night while DH is home (and after working out now that I'm finally doing that pretty regularly!)

amcam24

Thanks for all the advice!  I have the valco trimode twin for the babies, I was on the fence about the hitch hiker board, but maybe I should just get it.

 

I guess the plus side to not leaving the house is that no one knows I haven't showered.

schoolsoutbride

I'm scared....