I would like to have it natural

chouli77

I have several reasons for wanting a natural birth. I'm a biology teacher and have always believed in natural physiology and allowing your body to do its own thing. I enjoy seeing processes and changes and so forth. I know the woman's body was meant to do this and has done it since the begining. Also, no other women in my family have had epidurals. So I guess its kind of a tradition.

My husband wants me to get pain relief when I need it, but would support me in my belief. My fear is that I chicken out when the pain comes. I have no experience with this kind of pain. I think the most pain I've felt was gall stones. Will I be tough enough  or lack the courage of my convictions?

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jennya1113

I was dead set on a natural birth and I can tell you I was BEGGING for drugs.  Luckily my DH, midwife and the nurses were very supportive and just kept suggesting other things to alleviate the pain.  I ended up going all natural and I'm so glad I did it- it was the most amazing experience in the world.

I think it's important to remember why you're doing it and keep the end in sight- but nothing is more important than a supportive DH/midwife/etc because you will not be yourself in those moments and it's easy to be talked into drugs when you're in horrible pain!  You can do it- and it will be amazing!!

PlainandTall

I think you can do it... and that your reasons are well grounded... and the more you learn about it- the stronger your convictions will be.

I have had 3 VBACs with no pain meds and I never asked for drugs during labor nor did I feel they were calling to me... I just did my thing.  The first time I hit transition- my emotional feeling was... "OMG- I don't know how much of this I can take!" (thinking I was in for about 3 more hours of THAT...) I didn't know that what I was feeling was the very end and my baby would be born within 5 minutes.  In subsequent births- when that feeling hit- it was super intense- but I didn't have quite the same sense of despair because now I understood how my body did it. 

Also (and I'd love to hear carabiner's opinion/observations on this)  all my babies were born with minimal pushing- that for me- when that baby drops down and the transition is there- the baby is really ready to come out and I am really ready to get it out- Eva was born with two pushes during one contraction... the previous baby the same... and the one before that I labored down without pushing for 3 ctx- and then pushed her out in 2 pushes in one ctx.  I'm tall, I assume my pelvis bones may be larger than the average sized woman- it's possible that makes it easier for me (my babies are also big though) ... but it seems when I read birth stories with epidurals- the part that upsets me- is the idea that these women are pushing without feeling... that other people are telling them when they are ready and how to do it- and they have a harder (all be it painfree) time getting the baby out because they are not getting the sensory feedback they need.

I know that there are women who do labor naturally who wind up pushing for an extended time- but I wonder how it compares with epidural births.

 

gnomely

Well, take this from someone who has *not* given birth yet. But these are my preliminary thoughts and advice.

First, your reasoning is sound. It is a fascinating process. I know for me that it is one that I want to fully experience, physiologically to emotionally.

The pain part used to really scare me until I worked through it on a psychological level. I came to terms with my responses to fear, pain and expectation. Again, I don't know how this will all work when it happens but I feel mentally and emotionally ready to deal with it and take it as it comes. 

My best friend gave birth last year and she talked with me about labor yesterday. She gave me advice that I've heard before but it really helped hearing it from someone who eventually had to get pitocin and an epidural (she never progressed passed 5 cm). She said that normal labor is productive and instructive pain, especially if you have the mindset to accept it that way. That perspective really helps me.

Plus, you have time to prepare yourself to deal with the pain or comfort part of it. There are numerous programs such as Bradley, Hypnobabies, yoga, meditation, visualization, art therapy, journaling...

Hope all that helps! 

 ETA: Also, make sure your care is supportive. Your DH/MW/OB should all be on board with what you want. Look into hiring a doula for support. 

Leperfish2

As a woman who had her DD with no pain meds, and then had gallstones, and subsequently had her gallbladder removed, I can tell you this:

Giving birth was way the hell less painful than the gallstones!!

Fun2Dream

My best advice is to study - read up on what birth is like, read about different types of labor management, educate yourself on what epidurals entail - it's more than just pain relief.  If there's one in your area, I highly recommend taking a Bradley method class.  If there isn't, you can still read the books and get a lot out of them.  I love Ina May Gaskin's book Ina May's Guide to Childbirth, and my library has it.  That's where I'd start.  For me, the more I educated myself, the more dead set I was on having an intervention-free birth for the sake of my health, my baby's health, and because it was what I wanted most.

 

ETA: There was never a point in my labor when I felt like "I MUST HAVE DRUGS!"  I thought once, fleetingly, that some relief might be nice.  I think it has to do with your attitude and your labor.  Also, you mention your own pain scale.  I talked with my doula about this, and said I didn't know if I had a high pain tolerance or not.  She said it doesn't matter - labor is so different from anything you'll ever experience in life that you can't compare it.  And I agree 100%. 

chouli77

Leperfish2:

As a woman who had her DD with no pain meds, and then had gallstones, and subsequently had her gallbladder removed, I can tell you this:

Giving birth was way the hell less painful than the gallstones!!

 

I'm relieved to see this. I was 15 w/ the g-stones and had mine removed too.  I remember exactly how bad it was but I got through it. If I can stick to that mindset, I can do this.

roundtheworldgirl

The best way to safeguard against this is to prepare, prepare, prepare.  We took a Bradley class for 12 weeks, and while it didn't stop me from getting to the "I can't do this anymore" point, I still recommend it.  It helped DH get fully on board with our homebirth, and he built his own resolve to help me go natural.  So when I said to him "I can't do this anymore," and he said "Yes, you can," I believed him.  If he had said "OK, let's go to the hospital," I would have done it.

Which brings me to my next point ... staying away from the temptation in the first place.  I do not think I would have been strong enough to refuse the epi, had I been somewhere one was available.  There was no option for an epi at my house, and that's part of the reason I chose a homebirth.  I wanted to remove the temptation.  A freestanding birth center will provide the same security.

I am simply in awe of women who have natural births in hospitals.  I think that is way more difficult than doing it at home or in a birth center.  (And this is coming from a woman who had 21 hours of active back labor).

Kerianne1176

You can totally do it! If you had gall stones....I know I had kidney stones in my 22nd week. Labor pain was nothing in comparison and it was a purposeful pain that did not indicate that there was something wrong.  I actually don't even classify it as pain. It felt more like pressure to me.

I did what I now know is a form of self hypnosis in labor.  I found that I wanted to be alone a lot...I went into the bathroom and paced and breathed and vocalized through the contractions that allowed me to really consentrate and get on top of the discomfort.  I hummed a tune I knew from a movie that was only two notes but focused on keeping them in key.

If you really want to try and are in a hospital setting with a husband who might have a hard time seeing you in pain and medical professionals that you fear might dangle the carrot... I would recommend a doula who could help support you and your husband to lessen the temptation and help you to use techniques that will relieve some of the discomfort naturally. GL!!!

SageBeginnings

Oh Chouli - you can sooo do this!

As a Biology Teacher, I am sure you can appreciate this: birth is not inherently painful. As such, there are many options for you to consider. Many women, if they can take out the fear from the fear, tension, pain cycle, they can alleviate most of the discomfort of labor - this can take the form of education, hypnosis, or intrinsic/instinctual/innate preparation.

Education - If you were going to go with formal CBE classes, I would recommend either Hypnobabies or Bradley, because of your biology background. Hypnobabies reteaches your brain to understand this concept of labor as working muscles, not pain. This has allowed many women that I have worked with to have pain-free births. It teaches a conditioned response to hypnoanethesia cues. Very good outcomes. Bradley, OTOH, teaches the biological and physiological signposts and stages of labor and birth as well as multiple relaxation and massage techniques to work through each of these stages. 

Research - There are two major schools of thought on the pregnancy/birth camps: research of the clinical/medical options and research of the holistic/intrinsic. If you work things through in your head more than your heart, you may be in the first camp. I recommend taking one of the routes, though, so that you can be a proactive consumer in your healthcare. If you follow the first camp, I recommend reading Dr. Sear's The Birth Book, reading Henci Goer's Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth, and renting the Business of Being Born (and have your dh watch it - men find it entertaining and usually it helps them get on board). If you are following the second camp, I recommend reading Ina May's Guide to Childbirth as well as Birthing from Within and watching Gentle Birth Choices.  

Support - Building your birth team, I believe, is one of the most important things. Consider hiring a doula. They will provide the books and videos above (most likely) and be able to teach you much of what you would learn in a formal CBE class. If a doula is not in your budget, make DARNED sure your partner and birth team are on board with you. There comes a point in almost every woman's labor where she wants to give up (usually this means asking for medication).

This is a physiological/emotional stage of labor that is designed to get a woman out of her head and into her body so that she can transition from labor to birth - a triggering of hormones that require her to be out of her head and totally given over to the labor. As this is the MOST vulnerable part of labor, making sure your partner will back you 100% in your desire for a natural birth and won't cave and give in to you is very important. Making sure your birth team will encourage you and help guide you/love on you through this stage is of the utmost importance.

 

I know you can do this! Good luck and congrats!

chouli77

I want to extend a heartfelt thank you to all of you ladies. I will take your advice and trust my instincts. I'm sad to say Bradley classes are not offered in my area, but my OB has a midwife in her practice, and I will definitely look into hiring a doula. I love my husband and he's a staunch supporter, but I don't think he's going to handle seeing me like that for however many hours it takes. He has the white-knight syndrome bad!

SageBeginings, thank you for the book recommendations. I fall somewhere between a head and heart person so I will follow through on that. I believe in the power of guided meditation, imagery, music therapy, but also on postures, gravity, and mind over matter.