Can PPD get worse?

#1_BadgeBunny

I have suffered from some form of depression or anxiety since i was a teenager.  After a few years of therapy i was able to deal with most of it w/o drugs.  After having the LOs i recognized the feeling and went to my OB and got put on Zoloft (lowest does) The LOs are alomst 9 mo and i feel like things arent getting better... if anything worse?  I am so angry alllll o the time.  DH and i are always fighting and today i have had to resist the urge to just crawl in bed and cry! I am the fattest i have ever been.  I am exhausted and overwhelmed.  Is this still PPD or just depression?  I told DH today i was going back on BC and getting more meds bc im starting to slip into the unmotivated old me.  Any thoughts?

Sunrise6

It sounds like it is definitely still PPD and that a dose increase would help you out tremendously.  I, too, am on Zoloft and when I started I was on 50mg.  I felt great for about a month and then I started feeling more like I was before starting the med.  I wasn't as bad as I was before starting it, but it was close.  I asked my OB to increase my dose to 100mg and since then I've felt a LOT better.  Its now been 2 months on the higher dose and I do have off days, but they are few and far between.  I'd ask about a dose increase and see if that helps before trying another med/getting on more.  I hope you feel better soon!  Talk to your Dr. and keep us posted

#1_BadgeBunny

Thanks! I am going to call my OB tomorrow sometign has to give!

 I have spent the last hour or so crying bc i just screamed at DS.  The poor guy is only 8 months old and i screamed at him.  The LOs are going through seperation anxiety or something and are always clinging to me.  when they arent crawling on me or having me entertain them they are crying!!! I lost it at bedtime.  DS just cried and cried and cried bc i wouldnt hold him while i was dressing DD... so i yelled at him.  Poor guy got so scared and just balled up and let big dragon tears flow. WELL... i lost it and started crying big tears myself.  Both LOs stopped crying and looked up at me with this concerned look on thier faces! 

I never want to do that to them again! they shouldnt have to worry why mommy is crying at 8 months old! I shouldnt ever scream at my LO bc he is sad! i feel like an awful mother that i did that and i want to run away but the "sane" hahah side of me knows these things can happen and i need to get better control of it.  I will keep ya posted!

Sunrise6

I know exactly how you feel - I have gotten mad at DD because she was crying and I've set her in her crib and went across the house and screamed   I came back crying and she had the same concerned look on her face.  Then I kept saying "I'm SO sorry!  I love you so very much" and she then smiled and that made me smile and cry even more. I've yelled at her once before and did the same exact thing as you did.  DD is also going through the separation anxiety phase, and she cries every time I leave the room - even if I'm not in her sight she will cry.  I cannot go to the bathroom alone - her exersaucer is in our bathroom so she can be there too. 

Don't beat yourself up over it  - that doesn't help at all.  When I start to get frustrated I have to remind myself that she needs me and I'm the one that HAS to take care of her and protect her.  I can't get mad at her for NEEDING something, whether it be food, changed, or hugs and cuddles.  I'm very thankful that she WANTS ME to comfort her!  I also remember how I felt and how she reacted and I don't want that to happen again either.  

 

I'm really glad you're going to talk to your OB.  I hope you can get in soon.  When I called I talked to the nurse and asked if she could call in a rx for the higher dose, and then I went for a follow-up a month later.  I feel SO much better with the higher dose and I hope you do too!  Thanks for keeping us posted