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TTC after 35
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**JoesSweetpea**
I just read your post in the check in. I just wanted to comment that I am in exactly the same place that you are with TTC. I am not doing anything other than continuing my vitamins, spending time with DH, and hoping we can do it on our own. It is kind of liberating to be free from all the gadgets, worry, scheduling, and so on. But frightening at the same time. It has helped my mood immensely over the past few months to not worry myself sick over it. There may not be any IF treatments in my future because insurance won't help at all, and I don't want to spend the potential adoption fund we have put away.
Your post below pretty much sums up where I am right now too, but you said it much better than I could have. I just wanted to wish you luck!
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Re: **JoesSweetpea**
Hav2run, Thanks for the nod! And good luck to you as well.
I think LIBERATING is an excellent descriptor. I vowed that I never wanted trying to conceive a baby to become a 2nd job, and as it verged on becoming a chore to check off each month, we decided to pull back. In the beginning of our adventure, it was exciting and energizing to think that "maybe this was the month". But I realized something was not right when sex became a job.... when I actually heard myself say to DH, "don't worry about my needs". I don't think that sex has to be romantic or all-consuming all the time, but I want to be present 100%, and I found that I wasn't.
Now, we are back to our typical selves and just love being with each other. On that very note, it is that time of the month, so I have romancing to do when hubs gets home later!!!
To all of the ladies that read this, just be true to yourselves. Everyone's path is going to be different. and challenging. and frustrating. and memorable. and of course, EXCITING!!!
I completely agree with everything you said. The same thoughts were what made me abandon everything I was doing, and it has done wonders for my relationship with DH. I think we have more sex now than we did when we scheduled it in. It just feels better to be free of the obsessive thoughts I had when overanalyzing everything. I really felt like I was beginning to not want another baby because I was so stressed and let down every month. Now, I see the goal again. I know this is not the perfect remedy, and it will probably not last long for me, but I am enjoying it. I can get back to charting some other month. It's just nice to feel like me again.
Good luck to you and to anyone who is reading along. Everyone has their own way, and finds something that brings them peace on this nutty journey we are all on. If you find something that works for you, and helps you along the way, run with it.