Leaving a newborn overnight — The Bump
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Leaving a newborn overnight

Am I insane to think that I'm going to be able to leave my baby when s/he is just about or under a month old?  Since I don't have him/her yet, it doesn't seem too crazy to me.  We think it is important to celebrate our 1 year anniversary and want to stay somewhere overnight so we'll probably be spending about 24 hours away from the baby.  We plan to just go somewhere 1-2 hours away for an afternoon activity (spa maybe), a nice dinner and an overnight stay at a B&B or hotel, so we'll probably leave around 1:00 PM and return around the same time the next day.

I've narrowed my plans down to 3 places but haven't booked anything yet.  Will things really change so much that I'll end up just canceling this?

Keep in mind that I'm not BFing and my mom will be the one to stay with the baby.  (She is the one who will be providing child care when I return to work as well.)

Re: Leaving a newborn overnight

  • Honestly, I don't think I could have left Kellen for that long of a time period when he was that young.  A spa/dinner/overnight stay sound great, but I just don't think I could relax enough to enjoy it to the fullest.  Hell, I'm leaving Kellen tonight with Josh for a few hours to get my hair cut/highlighted and that makes me nervous!  LOL! 

    People feel differently about these types of things, so you might be fine.  Could you book the trip and then cancel within the given time frame if you decide you don't want to stay overnight once your LO is here?

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  • imageEleise96:

    Could you book the trip and then cancel within the given time frame if you decide you don't want to stay overnight once your LO is here?

    I'm leaning towards only booking a place if they give this option just in case.

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  • Rich and I attended my Christmas work party when Anderson was exactly 1 month old.  He stayed at my parents overnight.

    While it was difficult to actually leave him at their house, I had a great time (my first time drinking since giving birth) and it was nice.  

    On our way home we almost went to get him, but the roads were bad and we didn't want to bother him while he was sleeping.  At 6am (we were used to getting up to feed him) we wanted to go get him, just cause the house was not the same without him there.  But we waited until about 10.

    So I don't think it is out of the question.  It just depends how you are feeling at the time.

    BTW-I did not BF either, and it was 2 days before our 1 year anniversary so it was our night out.

  • I am leaving B overnight for the first time in about 3 weeks.  We will be leaving her for 3 nights.  I have to say I am super stressed out about it, and she will be 4 months old.  It doesn't help that she is currently not taking the bottle too well, and not sleeping well at night.  Also, my mom was originally going to keep her but now she will be out of town so I think it will be a combination of my dad and my mom's friend.  I would be a lot less stressed about it if it was going to be my mom.  The first time I ever left her, she was about 3 weeks old and I cried.  We were gone for 2-3 hours and I was very ready to get back to her.  If you can cancel your plans without penalty, though, it couldn't hurt to make then plans and then see how you feel.
  • I think that the baby will be fine and you may welcome a good night sleep at that point.  Just remember that it is only one night.
  • I can't imagine leaving her any time soon. But, I'd book it if there's not a penalty for canceling and then you can decide closer to the date. 
    Siggy Deleted Due to Internet Stalking. Mama to Q, born July 2010
  • I don't know how I will feel in a few weeks, but right now I couldn't imagine leaving him.  I let DH take him for 30 minutes to his friend's house the other day and I was a nervous wreck the entire time!
  • I would not have been able to leave G overnight at 1 month old....(and before I had her, I DID feel differently) but now that she is here, no way....We have gone out for a few hours here or there but nothing overnight yet. We celebrated our 2nd year anniversary with her and went out to lunch...just some of the sacrifices I guess...

    We will be leaving her at my Mom's for 2 nights in September when we go to the Keys, but she will be 4 months old at that time.... 

  • I am STILL nervous about leaving H with my mom ( the only person who watches her) for even 2 hours. There is just something about a mother's touch that can calm a baby. Everyone is different- but I have a hardtime imagining when I will be able to leave her overnight. (I think I would feel this way if I were BFing or not). Is it possible that you can celebrate before baby comes? Not to burst your bubble- but I also doubt that you will want to be romantic 4 wks post-partum. Sorry if that sounds harsh- just giving you my unbridled opinion since you asked!
  • Caroline is over a year old and I still haven't left her overnight. I think I would have had a really hard time doing it at one month, although a night away with a solid night's sleep probably would have done me wonders. I don't think I could have left her that early, but that's just me. I'm sure she would have been fine if I did.
  • Thanks for your input!

    Judy- I'm hoping that I feel like you and am able to do it.

    Carollyn- don't ever feel the need to apologize for giving your opinion when it's asked for!

    I've decided that I'm going to reserve a hotel room at the closest of the 3 locations which will also be the easiest to cancel.  (The B&Bs seem to be a little more of a PITA.)  That way we can leave a little later and get back a little earlier if we do end up going and it won't be a big deal if I change my mind and cancel in 2 weeks.

    It may seem silly to some people that I'm making such a big deal about needing to celebrate my 1st anny, but the thing that has me most nervous about Baby's arrival is what my relationship with DH will become.  I just think that by at least planning to make a big deal of it will make me feel like I'm putting in an effort to keep our relationship first right from the start.  (I know, I know, I'll be singing a different tune in 2 weeks!!  Smile )

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