I am so shocked by some of your replies. I agree that her attitude isn't the best for her or her child, but there's no need to be downright rude - calling soemone a douche, a ***, etc - how old are we? And we expect to teach our children better?? Honestly, I think she got the point three pages ago and at this point it's like watching someone get bullied in the schoolyard. We all have our hormonal days and crazy thoughts now and then, but I would never cast the first stone. The point of these boards is to provide SUPPORT to one another, not to ostracize people and think of every name in the book. Shame on you all who lack the decency and a grown-up vocabulary, you are no shining example of maturity.
I think you are being very ridiculous... i wasn't jealous when I found out my husbands ex-wife or my aunt was pregnant and due 2 weeks before me or my aunt due 2 weeks after me or when i lost the baby and they are all still pregnant. Honestly i think you need to grow up cause thats a little ridiculous...
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I am so shocked by some of your replies. I agree that her attitude isn't the best for her or her child, but there's no need to be downright rude - calling soemone a douche, a ***, etc - how old are we? And we expect to teach our children better?? Honestly, I think she got the point three pages ago and at this point it's like watching someone get bullied in the schoolyard. We all have our hormonal days and crazy thoughts now and then, but I would never cast the first stone. The point of these boards is to provide SUPPORT to one another, not to ostracize people and think of every name in the book. Shame on you all who lack the decency and a grown-up vocabulary, you are no shining example of maturity.
What grown-up vocabulary would you use? She asked peoples' opinions and there's no cap on how many people can reply. I see your reply if your first post on the bump....if this shocks you, you're not going to like most of the boards very much!
DS (7 years old) from FET in 2010 DD (5 years old) from IUI in 2012 TTC 3rd and final!: IUI #1 in progress!
I am so shocked by some of your replies. I agree that her attitude isn't the best for her or her child, but there's no need to be downright rude - calling soemone a douche, a ***, etc - how old are we? And we expect to teach our children better?? Honestly, I think she got the point three pages ago and at this point it's like watching someone get bullied in the schoolyard. We all have our hormonal days and crazy thoughts now and then, but I would never cast the first stone. The point of these boards is to provide SUPPORT to one another, not to ostracize people and think of every name in the book. Shame on you all who lack the decency and a grown-up vocabulary, you are no shining example of maturity.
Wrong. Not for support.
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I am due Feb 14th and found out one of my good friends is probably due Feb 21st (hasn't been to doctor to confim EDD yet). I am nothing but excited. I am so glad to have someone close going through the same things at the same times! And I am also glad that my child will have a friend right off the bat that is the same age.
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I am so shocked by some of your replies. I agree that her attitude isn't the best for her or her child, but there's no need to be downright rude - calling soemone a douche, a ***, etc - how old are we? And we expect to teach our children better?? Honestly, I think she got the point three pages ago and at this point it's like watching someone get bullied in the schoolyard. We all have our hormonal days and crazy thoughts now and then, but I would never cast the first stone. The point of these boards is to provide SUPPORT to one another, not to ostracize people and think of every name in the book. Shame on you all who lack the decency and a grown-up vocabulary, you are no shining example of maturity.
Sorry, mom!
I've said this before and I'll say it again ~ there is ALWAYS some newbie with less than 50 posts that comes along and sticks up for the OP. Always. You just have to wait for them. And it's this ones first post! Wow, congrats!
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I am so shocked by some of your replies. I agree that her attitude isn't the best for her or her child, but there's no need to be downright rude - calling soemone a douche, a ***, etc - how old are we? And we expect to teach our children better?? Honestly, I think she got the point three pages ago and at this point it's like watching someone get bullied in the schoolyard. We all have our hormonal days and crazy thoughts now and then, but I would never cast the first stone. The point of these boards is to provide SUPPORT to one another, not to ostracize people and think of every name in the book. Shame on you all who lack the decency and a grown-up vocabulary, you are no shining example of maturity.
With both of my pregnancies I shared the experience! It was awesome! The first was with my SIL and we were due 1 day apart! It was great to go throught it with someone (my first baby and her 3rd)! With my second pregnancy my BFF was due 3.5 weeks after me! Our girls love to see and play with eachother! I wouldn't have it any other way!
I will say at first when I found out my SIL was pregnant I was crushed because we had been trying for 1.5 years and her pregnancy was an accident and her 3rd child. We didn't know at the time that I was pregnant. We found out the next day!
You'll get over it! Be glad you get to share the experience and stories of pregnancy. It's also nice to have someone to talk to who is going through the same things asd you. Your DH will get sick of hearing about the same stuff over and over!
I think you are being very ridiculous... i wasn't jealous when I found out my husbands ex-wife or my aunt was pregnant and due 2 weeks before me or my aunt due 2 weeks after me or when i lost the baby and they are all still pregnant. Honestly i think you need to grow up cause thats a little ridiculous...
Why would anyone care about their husband's ex-wife... unless it's your husbands baby?
I think you are absolutely nuts. How about the joy of your kids can also be friends? Or you won't have to worry about losing a friend like a lot of people do when one person starts having kids before the other and everything changes? It's not about a competition, but sharing these joys together.
I actually had to laugh at this......I have a girlfriend who is exactly the same way. Its kind of ridiculous. I am pregnant and due in Feb. My girlfriend is actually mad that my babys birthday will be really close to her babys that was born this past Feb. Its stupid and childish................
I am so shocked by some of your replies. I agree that her attitude isn't the best for her or her child, but there's no need to be downright rude - calling soemone a douche, a ***, etc - how old are we? And we expect to teach our children better?? Honestly, I think she got the point three pages ago and at this point it's like watching someone get bullied in the schoolyard. We all have our hormonal days and crazy thoughts now and then, but I would never cast the first stone. The point of these boards is to provide SUPPORT to one another, not to ostracize people and think of every name in the book. Shame on you all who lack the decency and a grown-up vocabulary, you are no shining example of maturity.
Sorry, mom!
I've said this before and I'll say it again ~ there is ALWAYS some newbie with less than 50 posts that comes along and sticks up for the OP. Always. You just have to wait for them. And it's this ones first post! Wow, congrats!
I'm confused...So you all want the right to speak to someone in any matter that you choose and be able to respond to topics openly and freely, yet this poster was just giving her honest opinion on what was going on and just because she's new she isn't entitled to the same rights as the rest of you because you've all "been here longer". I'm sorry but this is immature behavior on everyone's part and yes I am new here and I honestly don't give a crap what ANY of you have to say about what I post here. Jesus, I thought when I signed up for this site that I would find like-minded people who were trying to support each other through an emotional and exciting time, instead I have mostly encountered bitter and judgemental women who have nothing better to do with their lives than sit around a computer screen and pick on people who view life differently than they do. If all of you have such a HUGE problem with new people than go create a private message board where noone is invited except the people in your little cliche, than you will never have to deal with any of us "newbies" again. I don't agree with the OP and her statement but believe it or not when I don't like something I choose NOT to comment, and for those of you who are saying "oh she hasn't been back to defend her comments" Well OF COURSE she hasn't, she probably feels so incredibly unwelcome and judged that she's afraid to post anything for the fear that anything she says will be ripped apart by a bunch of hungry sharks. Get over yourselves and think about how YOU would want to be treated if you asked a question that in your opinion was legitimate and everyone else decided to jump down your throat.
I'm confused...So you all want the right to speak to someone in any matter that you choose and be able to respond to topics openly and freely, yet this poster was just giving her honest opinion on what was going on and just because she's new she isn't entitled to the same rights as the rest of you because you've all "been here longer". I'm sorry but this is immature behavior on everyone's part and yes I am new here and I honestly don't give a crap what ANY of you have to say about what I post here. Jesus, I thought when I signed up for this site that I would find like-minded people who were trying to support each other through an emotional and exciting time, instead I have mostly encountered bitter and judgemental women who have nothing better to do with their lives than sit around a computer screen and pick on people who view life differently than they do. If all of you have such a HUGE problem with new people than go create a private message board where noone is invited except the people in your little cliche, than you will never have to deal with any of us "newbies" again. I don't agree with the OP and her statement but believe it or not when I don't like something I choose NOT to comment, and for those of you who are saying "oh she hasn't been back to defend her comments" Well OF COURSE she hasn't, she probably feels so incredibly unwelcome and judged that she's afraid to post anything for the fear that anything she says will be ripped apart by a bunch of hungry sharks. Get over yourselves and think about how YOU would want to be treated if you asked a question that in your opinion was legitimate and everyone else decided to jump down your throat.
Just my "newbie" two cents worth!
LOL... and it's 'clique'.
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I am so shocked by some of your replies. I agree that her attitude isn't the best for her or her child, but there's no need to be downright rude - calling soemone a douche, a ***, etc - how old are we? And we expect to teach our children better?? Honestly, I think she got the point three pages ago and at this point it's like watching someone get bullied in the schoolyard. We all have our hormonal days and crazy thoughts now and then, but I would never cast the first stone. The point of these boards is to provide SUPPORT to one another, not to ostracize people and think of every name in the book. Shame on you all who lack the decency and a grown-up vocabulary, you are no shining example of maturity.
Sorry, mom!
I've said this before and I'll say it again ~ there is ALWAYS some newbie with less than 50 posts that comes along and sticks up for the OP. Always. You just have to wait for them. And it's this ones first post! Wow, congrats!
I'm confused...So you all want the right to speak to someone in any matter that you choose and be able to respond to topics openly and freely, yet this poster was just giving her honest opinion on what was going on and just because she's new she isn't entitled to the same rights as the rest of you because you've all "been here longer". I'm sorry but this is immature behavior on everyone's part and yes I am new here and I honestly don't give a crap what ANY of you have to say about what I post here. Jesus, I thought when I signed up for this site that I would find like-minded people who were trying to support each other through an emotional and exciting time, instead I have mostly encountered bitter and judgemental women who have nothing better to do with their lives than sit around a computer screen and pick on people who view life differently than they do. If all of you have such a HUGE problem with new people than go create a private message board where noone is invited except the people in your little cliche, than you will never have to deal with any of us "newbies" again. I don't agree with the OP and her statement but believe it or not when I don't like something I choose NOT to comment, and for those of you who are saying "oh she hasn't been back to defend her comments" Well OF COURSE she hasn't, she probably feels so incredibly unwelcome and judged that she's afraid to post anything for the fear that anything she says will be ripped apart by a bunch of hungry sharks. Get over yourselves and think about how YOU would want to be treated if you asked a question that in your opinion was legitimate and everyone else decided to jump down your throat.
Just my "newbie" two cents worth!
I'm actually confused, too. OP asked if she was crazy, so no one should have responded unless they "liked" her post and thought she was not crazy? Only people who were going to reassure her that she wasn't a crazy, jealous person should have responded?
I don't think anyone has a "HUGE problem" with new people, and nobody said anything that would imply that. However, we do have a right to be amused when they start going off about how mean we all are.
Simply because most of us shared the opinion that yes, she is crazy and jealous, does not make us a clique, does not mean we need to get over ourselves, that we have "nothing better to do" or anything else you made up in your little rant - it means we all had the same opinion and shared it - plain and simple. I think you might be the one who needs to get off your soapbox and "get over yourself."
And I'm not even considered one of the snarky ones, so if you don't like what I have to say, you won't like the boards much more than the OP.
DS (7 years old) from FET in 2010 DD (5 years old) from IUI in 2012 TTC 3rd and final!: IUI #1 in progress!
I think people on this site are being very mean to you. You can't help how you feel. My pregnancy was unexpected and took some getting used to. Once I had gotten excited about it, my best friend told me that she was pregnant too. I was very hurt that I didn't even know she wanted to start a family yet. And, I too, felt a little upset at first. I don't think I would call it jealousy. I was worried that it would be made into a competition, which I admit is ridiculous. People have babies everyday! It is not something new. I think I was just more hurt that I had no idea at first. I think it takes time to adjust to the news. I am thrilled that we are going through this together. BUT, I do think that the way people are talking to you on this board is ridiculous!
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So you may not have read this far due to all of the berating and name calling, but I do have a different opinion. (And for all you sharks out there, I am a newbie who posts randomly and never bothers to come back and read up on people's responses to me...I'm not that self-centered)
However, I just found out my mom is pg, and though it's her 9th child, I was super excited to find out...but a day or so later, I was a little bummed. Your hormones are definitely pushing the "bummed" envelope, and I think you will end up enjoying yourself. I just am being a little selfish too, and don't really want to share my pregnancy with her since she's "had her turn" in my book, and I keep hoping no one decides to throw us a joint shower. I would be a little more excited to have another first-timer on board with me, just don't let this get between you two. I am sure your feelings will change, and probably very soon. I've definitely gone back and forth.
It's hard to keep in check sometimes, but you will save yourself a lot of grief if you just keep trucking how you were, and be sweet. "Fake it till you make it!"
My best friend gave birth to her first in April, and we didn't find out about our pregnancy until March. It's been great to have her support since she's recently been through it all, but we've recently talked about how we wished we would have had closer due dates, so we could go through things together. I don't think it's a bad thing at all. We are hoping our kids are close!
AimeeL85- Actually SEVERAL posters made reference to the fact that the only reason she asked this question was because she was a "newbie" and accused her of making it up, also the very FIRST person to defend her and say that some of the posters were being rude assholes ALSO got flamed because SHE was new, so YES I do believe that some of the people on this message board have a problem with new people. In my opinion it seems like everyone gets along just fine when the newbies are quiet and agreeing with everything that the other posters say, but as soon as they ask a question that one of the "senior" posters doesn't like or thinks is stupid they jump down their throat and tell them how crazy they are, or how they are MUD (which is the stupidest term I've ever heard of in the first place) or makes fun of them.
It is insane that a bunch of grown women are acting this way, it is one thing to voice your opinion and I am sure that the majority of the women on this board are well educated, intelligent women who KNOW how to constructively criticize someone without sounding like a bunch of teenagers on a school bus. You are right, if they didnt like what she was saying they shouldn't have replied with their negative comments, but EVEN if you don't agree with her there is a way to get a point across without sounding like a ***.
I am also pretty sure I said that it was MOST of the women on here but I didn't say it was ALL of them, some are very nice and even when they don't agree with you they still have a polite way of saying it.. I have found by lurking on other boards that sadly this a huge problem here on thebump which I really don't understand because I'm pretty sure that the very FIRST community rule talks about NOT ostracizing people and that if you are found to be acting in that way you will be removed..yet I have read some posts that would make my former Navy Seal father blush....My DH read all of the posts and wondered why ANYONE felt the need to be rude when the OP said it was possible she was just being "hormonal" ; If a man can figure that part out I would think that 101 other pregnant women would be able to do the same.
Re: Am I crazy to be jelous?
What grown-up vocabulary would you use? She asked peoples' opinions and there's no cap on how many people can reply. I see your reply if your first post on the bump....if this shocks you, you're not going to like most of the boards very much!
DD (5 years old) from IUI in 2012
TTC 3rd and final!: IUI #1 in progress!
Wrong. Not for support.
Sorry, mom!
I've said this before and I'll say it again ~ there is ALWAYS some newbie with less than 50 posts that comes along and sticks up for the OP. Always. You just have to wait for them. And it's this ones first post! Wow, congrats!
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaand we have a winner!
You're an asshat....
My BFF and I had our babies 3 weeks apart and it was the best thing to happen to us. Our babies are perfect playmates for eachother.
You need to grow up and be a better friend.
With both of my pregnancies I shared the experience! It was awesome! The first was with my SIL and we were due 1 day apart! It was great to go throught it with someone (my first baby and her 3rd)! With my second pregnancy my BFF was due 3.5 weeks after me! Our girls love to see and play with eachother! I wouldn't have it any other way!
I will say at first when I found out my SIL was pregnant I was crushed because we had been trying for 1.5 years and her pregnancy was an accident and her 3rd child. We didn't know at the time that I was pregnant. We found out the next day!
You'll get over it! Be glad you get to share the experience and stories of pregnancy. It's also nice to have someone to talk to who is going through the same things asd you. Your DH will get sick of hearing about the same stuff over and over!
Why would anyone care about their husband's ex-wife... unless it's your husbands baby?
My Chart My Nest Bio
I actually had to laugh at this......I have a girlfriend who is exactly the same way. Its kind of ridiculous. I am pregnant and due in Feb. My girlfriend is actually mad that my babys birthday will be really close to her babys that was born this past Feb. Its stupid and childish................
I'm confused...So you all want the right to speak to someone in any matter that you choose and be able to respond to topics openly and freely, yet this poster was just giving her honest opinion on what was going on and just because she's new she isn't entitled to the same rights as the rest of you because you've all "been here longer". I'm sorry but this is immature behavior on everyone's part and yes I am new here and I honestly don't give a crap what ANY of you have to say about what I post here. Jesus, I thought when I signed up for this site that I would find like-minded people who were trying to support each other through an emotional and exciting time, instead I have mostly encountered bitter and judgemental women who have nothing better to do with their lives than sit around a computer screen and pick on people who view life differently than they do. If all of you have such a HUGE problem with new people than go create a private message board where noone is invited except the people in your little cliche, than you will never have to deal with any of us "newbies" again. I don't agree with the OP and her statement but believe it or not when I don't like something I choose NOT to comment, and for those of you who are saying "oh she hasn't been back to defend her comments" Well OF COURSE she hasn't, she probably feels so incredibly unwelcome and judged that she's afraid to post anything for the fear that anything she says will be ripped apart by a bunch of hungry sharks. Get over yourselves and think about how YOU would want to be treated if you asked a question that in your opinion was legitimate and everyone else decided to jump down your throat.
Just my "newbie" two cents worth!
LOL... and it's 'clique'.
I'm actually confused, too. OP asked if she was crazy, so no one should have responded unless they "liked" her post and thought she was not crazy? Only people who were going to reassure her that she wasn't a crazy, jealous person should have responded?
I don't think anyone has a "HUGE problem" with new people, and nobody said anything that would imply that. However, we do have a right to be amused when they start going off about how mean we all are.
Simply because most of us shared the opinion that yes, she is crazy and jealous, does not make us a clique, does not mean we need to get over ourselves, that we have "nothing better to do" or anything else you made up in your little rant - it means we all had the same opinion and shared it - plain and simple. I think you might be the one who needs to get off your soapbox and "get over yourself."
And I'm not even considered one of the snarky ones, so if you don't like what I have to say, you won't like the boards much more than the OP.
DD (5 years old) from IUI in 2012
TTC 3rd and final!: IUI #1 in progress!
So you may not have read this far due to all of the berating and name calling, but I do have a different opinion. (And for all you sharks out there, I am a newbie who posts randomly and never bothers to come back and read up on people's responses to me...I'm not that self-centered)
However, I just found out my mom is pg, and though it's her 9th child, I was super excited to find out...but a day or so later, I was a little bummed. Your hormones are definitely pushing the "bummed" envelope, and I think you will end up enjoying yourself. I just am being a little selfish too, and don't really want to share my pregnancy with her since she's "had her turn" in my book, and I keep hoping no one decides to throw us a joint shower. I would be a little more excited to have another first-timer on board with me, just don't let this get between you two. I am sure your feelings will change, and probably very soon. I've definitely gone back and forth.
It's hard to keep in check sometimes, but you will save yourself a lot of grief if you just keep trucking how you were, and be sweet. "Fake it till you make it!"
You don't see a "slight" difference in these two situations? At all?
AimeeL85- Actually SEVERAL posters made reference to the fact that the only reason she asked this question was because she was a "newbie" and accused her of making it up, also the very FIRST person to defend her and say that some of the posters were being rude assholes ALSO got flamed because SHE was new, so YES I do believe that some of the people on this message board have a problem with new people. In my opinion it seems like everyone gets along just fine when the newbies are quiet and agreeing with everything that the other posters say, but as soon as they ask a question that one of the "senior" posters doesn't like or thinks is stupid they jump down their throat and tell them how crazy they are, or how they are MUD (which is the stupidest term I've ever heard of in the first place) or makes fun of them.
It is insane that a bunch of grown women are acting this way, it is one thing to voice your opinion and I am sure that the majority of the women on this board are well educated, intelligent women who KNOW how to constructively criticize someone without sounding like a bunch of teenagers on a school bus. You are right, if they didnt like what she was saying they shouldn't have replied with their negative comments, but EVEN if you don't agree with her there is a way to get a point across without sounding like a ***.
I am also pretty sure I said that it was MOST of the women on here but I didn't say it was ALL of them, some are very nice and even when they don't agree with you they still have a polite way of saying it.. I have found by lurking on other boards that sadly this a huge problem here on thebump which I really don't understand because I'm pretty sure that the very FIRST community rule talks about NOT ostracizing people and that if you are found to be acting in that way you will be removed..yet I have read some posts that would make my former Navy Seal father blush....My DH read all of the posts and wondered why ANYONE felt the need to be rude when the OP said it was possible she was just being "hormonal" ; If a man can figure that part out I would think that 101 other pregnant women would be able to do the same.