New to The Bump
carrie478
member
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Newbie
carrie478
member
I posted this on a another board, but I think I may have been in the wrong place... Hi everyone!I am new here. And I am here because I have baby fever!! I feel like everyone around me either has kids or is pregnant. My husband and I are waiting until he is at a certain point in his schooling, when he can work part time, before we start trying. My problem...I just turned 30. And I can't shake the feeling that my fertility has dropped. I always wanted to be a young mom. Obviously that's not happening. I'm feeling impatient. I've been waiting to be a mom forever. I am tired of waiting. I feel overwhelmed with the people who are parents/parents to be right now. I just want to be there too. We have another year and a half before we are where we want to be. (This is more my husband than me. Personally if it were up to me we would be trying now) I worry that when we do start trying, it will take a long time. And what if we try for a year and then nothing? And then we have to do all that testing? What if the treatments are too expensive? Is that stuff covered by insurance? Or what if we are able to afford the treatments and that still takes us too long? What if I can't get pregnant? It takes a long time to determine that. But if we do come to that conclusion, then it's on to adoption. Besides the fact that I am not sure how long I will need to "mourn" not being able to get pregnant before I can accept adoption, the adoption process itself takes forever too. So by the time we actually get to be parents, I'm in my mid to late 30's and my husband is late 30's to early 40's!!!! These are the things that go through my head. Can anyone make sense of it and give me any advice? It would be much appreciated.
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Re: Newbie
Breathe! I think many of us have been there, including me. It often feels like everyone around me is either pregnant or has a new baby- there was actually a joke at work not to drink from the water cooler unless you want to be pregnant. Facebook makes it worse! Everyday someone is posting ultrasounds or baby pics. Just remember that you want to do it right, and sometimes that means waiting just a little bit longer.
There are definitely ways to fill the time though, and feel like you are being productive. Read books about fertility and get on prenatal vitamins. Get into the best physical shape of your life- call it your "pre-baby hot body!" Get off birth control pills, if you're on them, and switch to a non-hormonal contraceptive so your body can get back into its natural rhythms. Start charting and get to know your body and your cycles. Make the needed changes in your diet and lifestyle, so that when you do start trying, you've done everything you can to eliminate some of the simple roadblocks that could get in your way! And in the meantime, do the things you want to do before you become a mom- travel and have fun!
You'll get there! And in the meantime, it is absolutely your right to wish and dream and be impatient- just try not to let it take over your life! Good luck!