Am I being overly sensitive?

sophiet496

DH is driving me a bit nuts lately....I'll be the first to admit that my mom can be very annoying!  She drives me nuts often enough.  But DH complains about some aspect of her pretty much every other day to me.  She had been watching L 2-3 times a week since March when I went back to teaching (for free), so she has been at our house way more than normal, and that is hard.  But it's always something negative...she left water in the tea kettle, she leaves her newspaper on the cofee table, she leaves latex gloves for bottle washing in our junk drawer, the guest bedroom smells weird....

 It's like what am I supposed to say?  She also watches our son free of charge, gave us the funds to close on our house last August, enabled me to take an extra 5 weeks of maternity leave, and just generally tries to be really kind to us.  I know she can also be overbearing and overly quiet etc...but maybe if he slipped a nice word in once in awhile instead of just venting all the negative.  I don't know...am I being too sensitive?

vmm0016

I don't think you are being too sensitive.  I would tell your mom what he finds annoying though because she probably doesn't even know she is doing it.

sgrl

Gosh, those are such tiny things. It sounds like he's being really petty to me. My MIL has the capacity to drive me nuts, but when she watched Sadie 3 days/week when I first went back to work, I made an effort to appreciate the huge favor she was doing for us and not nitpick about the parts of her personality that grind my gears - especially not to my husband. That's not even fair. She's your MOM, you know? It just puts you in an awkward position when he complains.

LovingLife!

Not at all! I am the opposite, I know I can get this way about my MIL and try really hard not to. Even though she is annoying, and drives DH crazy too, she still is DH's mother.

I would have a heart to heart with DH and let him know how it makes you feel. When DH did this with me, I had no idea it hurt him so much when I jumped on the put-down-MIL train. 

GL! 

SamsMom91

I'd probably be tempted to tell him to spend the money on daycare and you'll really see what annoying is--watching numbers go down on your bank account!

sgrl

LovingLife!:

Not at all! I am the opposite, I know I can get this way about my MIL and try really hard not to. Even though she is annoying, and drives DH crazy too, she still is DH's mother.

I would have a heart to heart with DH and let him know how it makes you feel. When DH did this with me, I had no idea it hurt him so much when I jumped on the put-down-MIL train. 

GL! 

This - sorry to reply again, but it can be just unbelievably toxic to a marriage when one or both spouses is constantly tearing down the other's family. We were both guilty of this at one point and it is very damaging!

daisy_dueller

I don't think you're being too sensitive at all! Those are such petty, little annoyances. I would have a chat with him about it, because maybe he has no idea he's being such a negative nancy.